4 upvotes, 2 direct replies (showing 2)
View submission: Weekly Free Talk Friday Thread!
A couple things real quick. I know that you're using this term for yourself, manlet, but it's rude to yourself. It's demeaning to you as a person and I think we talk about ourself matters.
I'm 5'6. And I think you should ditch the lifts.
Like, I get it. Being short is it's own barrier but lifts don't actually address the lingering insecurity that can haunt us. Try to find a way to own your height because otherwise we'll be short *and* insecure. Any person in a meaningful relationship with us is going to notice 4" platforms.
It becomes like, Greyfox never goes swimming, plays pickleball, for a hike, wears shorts or all kinds of normal things because we have to upkeep this illusion that we're 5'8.
So what it does is it creates a barrier between how you want to appear as 5'8 and who you are as 5'4 without the lifts. That can create tension in a LOT of ways we may not always understand in the moment.
I also want to introduce the idea that it may not just be the lifts that explains the difference in how people see you. I think people often adopt how we see ourselves. Height plays a part sure, I get that. But I think confidence plays a bigger part. Are people seeing you different because you're taller or just more confident while wearing lifts? Can we build up that confidence without lifts that might damage your gait?
The truth is that I think the lifts feed our insecurities more than they help. And a deep insecurity about our own body is so much more likely to be a barrier to healthy relationships than 4".
Edit: You deserve to feel good about yourself. Feel that.
Comment by ShrineToOne at 15/02/2025 at 00:31 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
This, this is the answer.
I will admit I am 6'2 but the most successful guy I know is like 5'6.
Even at 6'2 you'd be surprised by how small you can seem if you don't have confidence. I have been talked down to by people much shorter than me.
Developing confidence and feeling good about yourself will make up for a lot. That means ditch the lifts and the platforms and own your height. Otherwise you'll be left always thinking being slightly taller will solve all problems.
Comment by Ecstatic-Frame6066 at 14/02/2025 at 23:28 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Thank you Greyfox. I especially love the way you wrote your comment with the use of "we" and "our" :')
I might ditch them but my god I feel almost afraid at the prospect of being outside without them