Comment by Elvenstar32 on 05/08/2017 at 13:25 UTC

19696 upvotes, 23 direct replies (showing 23)

View submission: TIFU by cumming into a coconut

I get that your horny brain made you think that fucking a coconut was a good idea, that's not even what surprises me.

But your brain is supposed to return to normal after you blow your load so why did your normal brain tell you "it's fine to leave an open coconut in a warm room with semen and butter in it" and most importantly how were you not disgusted at the idea of fapping by using your several days old semen as lubricant ?!

Replies

Comment by majorbhalu at 05/08/2017 at 14:03 UTC

5972 upvotes, 2 direct replies

You said it bro.

Comment by yeeval at 05/08/2017 at 21:41 UTC

2322 upvotes, 3 direct replies

Yeah that semen lube grossed me out more than anything (well besides the maggots in my urethra part). How would any one think that's a good idea

Comment by ElViejoHG at 05/08/2017 at 20:05 UTC

1185 upvotes, 6 direct replies

He really loved that coco man

Comment by [deleted] at 05/08/2017 at 21:19 UTC

147 upvotes, 3 direct replies

A fucked up individual by the sounds of it. Also, now I'll never be able to see a coconut without that damn sick story coming to mind. (No, don't even say it)

Comment by somanyroads at 06/08/2017 at 01:51 UTC

14 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Lol...there's so much malfunction here, it's safe to say OP hasn't made a full recovery yet. More news at 10 :-0

Comment by BreezyWrigley at 07/08/2017 at 19:39 UTC

10 upvotes, 0 direct replies

because OP is apparently a degenerate savage

Comment by [deleted] at 06/08/2017 at 04:21 UTC

10 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Normal brain never has full control. Fucked up brain is always lurking and making small decisions that normal brain wouldn't even think of. Like saving a self carved fetid coconut flesh light.

Comment by [deleted] at 06/08/2017 at 02:56 UTC

17 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Dude he's in Mozambique. Do you think he got proper nutrition as a child? Probably a water head.

Comment by kayzingzingy at 07/08/2017 at 13:06 UTC

8 upvotes, 0 direct replies

This is the reason evolution has made men feel ashamed after masturbating

Comment by Muthafuxajones at 08/08/2017 at 00:11 UTC

3 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Probably the same mentality that the cumbox guy had.

Comment by MintChocolateEnema at 10/08/2017 at 21:37 UTC

3 upvotes, 0 direct replies

The heart wants what it wants.

Comment by Rockcroc2000 at 24/08/2017 at 09:30 UTC

3 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Lmao exactly like I can blow my load to some strange things but afterwards I feel a little sick and ask myself how the fuck I did it. This dude is always horny apparently.

Comment by Soldier_0f_4tune at 07/10/2017 at 05:59 UTC

3 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Cuz he went loco after a coco

Comment by Kignak at 08/08/2017 at 06:01 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

It's the same type of thinking that made the cumbox.

Comment by bullschmit17 at 08/08/2017 at 13:28 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

https://youtu.be/TErySTMbFlk

Comment by 3Types at 06/01/2018 at 21:08 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

He about as sick and confused as the tifu with the dude shoving the comb with soap on it up his ass... Reddit has some weird people...

Comment by Zorrostrian at 09/11/2021 at 14:14 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Because he was also a teenager.

Comment by TristianH at 15/02/2022 at 23:35 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

He’s African bro

Comment by thuanjinkee at 22/02/2022 at 01:47 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Brudder bought a coconut, he bought it for a dime

His sister had anudder one, she paid it for de lime

She put de lime in de coconut, she drank 'em bot' up

She put de lime in de coconut, she drank 'em bot' up

She put de lime in de coconut, she drank 'em bot' up

She put de lime in de coconut, she called de doctor, woke 'im up

And said "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"

I said "Doctor, to relieve this bellyache?"

I said "Doctor, ain't there nothin' I can take?"

I said "Doctor, to relieve this bellyache?"

Comment by Shortbus-Thug at 10/04/2022 at 02:06 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

I know I’m a little late, but teenage boys are fuckin dumb

Comment by Shootthemoon4 at 13/07/2022 at 05:14 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Some people find used semen sexy, but they don’t find maggots very sexy.

Comment by Beginning-Fall-5734 at 26/10/2022 at 16:12 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

he's masturbating to begin with, obviously he isn't thinking clearly............. i don't know if you know this but masturbation releases semen.... which is for procreation.... your hand doesn't procreate... understand?

Comment by Elkanterax at 06/11/2022 at 00:13 UTC

1 upvotes, 0 direct replies

Yeah, that part makes me want to cringe up into a ball of extremely high density, but not enough to make me turn into a blackhole, I don't want to consequentially suck up this guys rotting coconut. Or what's left of it anyways.