6 upvotes, 3 direct replies (showing 3)
View submission: Do non-binary identities reenforce gender stereotypes?
Hi there! I'm a trans woman who actually disagrees pretty strongly with Butler, especially her idea that to deconstruct gender, we need to splinter gender into 1000 subgenders. We definitely agree about that.
But I have a few differences as well.
Despite gender being constructed and performative, that doesn't mean that participating in it is a choice. Gender is a social phenomenon. This means that regardless of what we do, we will activately be participating, whether we're thinking about it or not.
Likewise, the "labelling frenzy" exists for the same reason we have a name for every hue of color. Like they say, a rose is a rose by any other name -- as long as there have been the contemporary gender roles, there have been infinite reactions between the individual and those social roles. Likewise, there are pretty much infinite ways to express gender. Going back to the color analogy, there have been studies that show that the better your color vocabulary is, the better you are at identifying different cues -- meaning your mind can more accurately differentiate the signals being sent by the eyes. Likewise, all of the labels can help those who are interested in better understanding their internal world and its relationship to the constructed social world around us.
So for a non-binary person, they more or less can't find any traditional gender role that suits their internal world well, stuck in negative internal reactions. If they don't behave in a way that's socially deemed "rebellion," they end up feeling like they're betraying themselves (which can actually be frustrating -- most people don't wanna be 'rebels,' they just want to live right with themselves.) so in some ways, sure it's a choice -- live in a way that internal friction, or live in a way that creates social friction. You're right that most people prefer to not think about it, but that's not a luxury that everybody gets
Quick E: you're also right that the current categories we have definitely shape the particular way that people express their gender and conceptualize themselves. Unfortunately, the only way to escape that is to not live in a society with shared meanings and concepts
Comment by fitz_newru at 12/01/2025 at 17:10 UTC
3 upvotes, 0 direct replies
This is the best response I've seen so far. Thanks for that.
Comment by mcove97 at 13/01/2025 at 16:35 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
* live in a way that internal friction, or live in a way that creates social friction.
Hey that's actually a really great answer. Second that it's the best explanation in this thread so far I've read down. Also I can relate as someone who behaves in a "socially rebellious way" to be true myself. I don't care if society views it as rebellious though, even if it makes it more difficult for me. I want to show people that yes, you can be a gender non conforming person, and not conform to gendered norms or expectations and still identify with the sex you were born with.
It really makes me want to be even more so resistant to the gendered pressures the more I am pressured to conform, because having traditional gender expectations pushed on me really pisses me off lol.
It's not the path of least resistance that's true, but I do think in the long run it is the path forward to where we one day live in a society where we can be who we are, without changing how we look or act or identify to conform to other people's ideas of gender or societal gender expectations in general.
Also, I want to be an inspiration to people, that they too can see someone be who they are, without trying to conform.
Comment by Mu5hroomHead at 14/01/2025 at 00:42 UTC
2 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Wouldn’t it be better to break down these gender stereotypes so women and men everywhere can have more freedom to express themselves? Instead of creating a new gender and leaving women and men behind in their evermore constricting boxes?
By choosing to identify as non-binary; you’re spreading the message that you can’t be a woman who has short hair, or a man who wears a dress. If you don’t fit in these gender stereotypes, you must be non-binary. This is not progress, it reenforces gender stereotypes.
Rebels challenge social norms, not create new labels to hide behind.