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View submission: 37F dating after separation, partner with low libido again....
I can't say for others, I can only tell you my experience. I was extremely attracted to my ex-wife all the way we were together. Our relationship started out bumpy, but sex was good, and the first few years were good even with highs and lows. She was "in love" with her fantasy about me and gradually became repelled and disgusted of the person I actually was. I've seen the contempt and judgement on her face all the time and that basically killed my desire to have sex with her. Everytime I looked at her, I got a boner, she was very sexy to me, but I was not able to touch her even.
Another instance: I had a girlfriend who was not really my type, but she was definitely sexy. We started out her telling me she was asexual but then suddenly very high sex drive. Turned out she had trauma from her ex-bf being abusive with her, and well I was nice to her... but then after a few times she kept bringing up the "let's brake up talk" right after sex, or even during sex. That completely messed my head up and we went into having sex maybe once a week, then even less.
Also happened that I was in a relationship but still not over my ex, and I had very vivid dreams of my ex but waking up next to someone else... that fucked me up bad, and my partner at the time felt like she was not attractive enough for me.
Personally, I need emotional safety to be able to have sex with my partner. If I have to worry about the relationship all the time, that kills sex for me, and I'd run into pornography then porn addiction. So to me it's mostly mental / emotional. They might also have a blockage like this related or unrelated to you.
There's nothing here!