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Update : We talked last night, and agreed that stepping back, and her getting into therapy is needed. I will be there for her, as much as I can, but will not be with her, or a romantic partner. She is scared that she is more broken than she realizes, and that therapy will be hard and opening it all up will be overwhelming. I told her that it will be hard, but you can't keep slicing open the same wound, and expect it to heal. She told me she had spent the each night the last 7-10 nights crying her eyes out over the few things she had told me she knew she needed to work on, as she knew it wasn't healthy, and wasn't good for either of us. She said she wants to be healthy, and find herself, for her. When I mentioned to her that being self sacrificing isn't healthy in this relationship, she responded with "But love is sacrificing..." and I had to stop her, and explain that yes, to a degree, but not to self harm. She actually scheduled her first therapy appt last night, and I'm beyond happy that she took me seriously and is seeking the help she needs to heal, and find herself, her voice, and her place in the world, again.*
There's nothing here!