6 upvotes, 1 direct replies (showing 1)
I found this very helpful for both choosing partners and navigating relationships.
I think one of the things that really stuck out to me was Gottman saying, when you choose your relationships you choose your fights. Basically whatever conflicts or issues you have at the start, you will continue to have all the way through. It's a matter of how you "fight", ie how you communicate together and work through issues. He basically learned after researching couples for decades, it's the ones that "fight well" that are happy. So choosing someone compatible and navigating conflict well.
Basically if you choose someone who doesn't meet your needs, or you wish would change to meet your needs in some way, you're choosing to endure that for the duration of the entire relationship. You date on potential, this is the outcome.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AKTyPgwfPgg
Comment by Midas_Ag at 14/01/2025 at 04:03 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
Thank you for sharing that. A lot to think about.