3 upvotes, 2 direct replies (showing 2)
View submission: What's something you never understood about the opposite gender?
There's a great episode of Malcom in the Middle that addresses this. Towards the end of the episode, Lois lists a bunch of things she wants her husband and sons to do so she feels appreciated. They agree, and she says something along the lines of, if it's so easy, why do I have to ask? Can't you figure it out? Hal's response is:
Oh, geez, honey, that's never going to happen. We're not smart enough to do that. Look who you're talking to. You might as well ask us all to be a foot taller. Sweetie, you're always going to have to tell us what to do. I mean, look at this half-baked celebration. I mean, we're at the top of our game here. Honey, the only thing that we're ever going to be able to offer you is our total abject obedience. I-I know that doesn't sound like much, but if you look at it this way, our meager abilities are yours completely-- 100%.
Then, naturally, they get into a fist fight with a bunch of clowns at the batting cages. It's not a perfect explanation because it's also a comedy TV show, but I always liked this moment a lot.
Comment by chronicallyindi at 09/03/2025 at 06:05 UTC
8 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Yeah… I suppose I don’t understand because women seem to be able to do these things that men deem completely impossible and absurd to expect. And, some men do too. It’s just that it’s much more common for women to do - and often to the point that it’s almost expected, because women do it so naturally that to some it’s jarring when they don’t.
Maybe it’s in-part that women are socialised to be caretakers and generally have a higher EQ. But it really doesn’t feel like it should be such an apparently huge ask for men to know the women they love well enough to be able to do some things for them without being prompted or needing a lot of guidance. Or to be able to remember that certain things hurt them and to make an effort to not do those things.
Often relationships with men that struggle with this sort of thing feels like you’re being treated as a generic ‘female’, or as if your partner doesn’t think about you unless prompted, which feels terrible.
Comment by groucho_barks at 09/03/2025 at 12:11 UTC
0 upvotes, 1 direct replies
Sounds exactly like weaponized incompetence.