67 upvotes, 3 direct replies (showing 3)
View submission: What's something you never understood about the opposite gender?
Because we care more about what your intent is, and how you act without having to be told. Doing something we’ve told you to do has little meaning compared to doing the right thing of your own volition.
If you genuinely don’t know what to do because you *genuinely* don’t know how each option will make a woman feel and what she would actually want, communicate with her about the options and her feelings. Say you actually care and want to do the right thing but you don’t know what it is. The caveat to this is that you have to have made a genuine effort to know her and understand her, and have actually thought about the options on your own - not just decide it’s easier to be told what to do than to do the work.
To be known, truly known, is to be loved. We want to be known.
Comment by asshat123 at 09/03/2025 at 02:14 UTC
4 upvotes, 2 direct replies
There's a great episode of Malcom in the Middle that addresses this. Towards the end of the episode, Lois lists a bunch of things she wants her husband and sons to do so she feels appreciated. They agree, and she says something along the lines of, if it's so easy, why do I have to ask? Can't you figure it out? Hal's response is:
Oh, geez, honey, that's never going to happen. We're not smart enough to do that. Look who you're talking to. You might as well ask us all to be a foot taller. Sweetie, you're always going to have to tell us what to do. I mean, look at this half-baked celebration. I mean, we're at the top of our game here. Honey, the only thing that we're ever going to be able to offer you is our total abject obedience. I-I know that doesn't sound like much, but if you look at it this way, our meager abilities are yours completely-- 100%.
Then, naturally, they get into a fist fight with a bunch of clowns at the batting cages. It's not a perfect explanation because it's also a comedy TV show, but I always liked this moment a lot.
Comment by monishgowda05 at 08/03/2025 at 20:31 UTC
6 upvotes, 3 direct replies
And how to know them truly without them telling us tho. How are we supposed to know what she likes without her telling it? Take this for example , once i gave a girl a teddy bear as her Birthday gift , and it was a purple one and somehow she told me that i should have got her a red one cause it was her favorite color, when i told her i didnt know it , she told me how dumb am i that i didnt notice her collection of clothes and majorly red was there , her red keychain , pouch , bag , pencil etc , now the worse thing tho , how to even deduce that at that time , i didnt even think about colour in the first place , i thought she might like something cute and the teddy bear was looking cute enough.
Comment by upsidedwnsmileyface at 09/03/2025 at 10:52 UTC
1 upvotes, 0 direct replies
💯This 100%.