10 upvotes, 1 direct replies (showing 1)
View submission: What's something you never understood about the opposite gender?
Oh there's a lot of 3 for sure !
I'd also add :
4. We aren't socialized to prioritize our own needs over that of the group. This is slowly changing, but when we're little girls, we're taught to get along for the sake of getting along. If someone annoys you, keep it to yourself ; or maybe you haven't made enough of an effort for them to be nicer ? If someone is mean to you, what have you done to deserve it ? If there is a conflict, why haven't you found a way to compromise ? Girls are taught to be sweet and agreeable. Don't make waves. Don't let others down.
This goes fundamentally against the idea of leaving your "friend" group when things go wrong.
Comment by StronkWatercress at 09/03/2025 at 02:59 UTC
7 upvotes, 1 direct replies
This is soooo true.
I read Queen Bees and Wannabes (the "guide to middle school" book Mean Girls was based on). One point they made that really stuck in my head, was that the cruel friendships and friend groups many girls got into warped their senses of boundaries, self-advocacy, and love, and in a sense, prepared them to get into abusive or unfulfilling romantic relationships. After all they're told since youth that they should try to make things work with people who are shitty to them, and that kind of conditioning doesn't go away easily, unfortunately.