Almost apocalyptic

When I found the person that stole my bike

it was almost apocalyptic!

When I found the person that stole my bike,

I wanted to cut them down.

I wanted to chop them apart in so many pieces!

I wanted to burn their burn their bones with some feces!

I did want to do these things,

but I held it together.

I wanted to these things because

I found, I found my bike named Bob!

so I did what we all do,

and I planted a bomb!

It was just a stink, stink bomb,

but it still really, really long.

And they were covering their mouths so much,

as I beat them, beat them down!

I know I shouldn't have touched them right,

but then they touched my Bob.

I needed to protect my Bob,

and I needed to insure that

they wouldn't steal my bike again.

That they wouldn't steal

someone else's bike.

So I broke their legs at their knees,

while they were covering their eyes.

Now they need a wheelchair,

and they can get transportation services.

I kind of helped them there,

because they had no way to get

from here to there without

violating, yes, the law.

I know I should have stopped,

but I thought I was being helpful!

I slipped away in the smoke and the stink.

I slipped away in the stink.

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