So I am nearing 40 and the whole concept of making adult friends is difficult at best. I feel like most of mine just slowly and assuredly falls off the radar.
Did anyone else learn any good ways to find new friends?
2 weeks ago · 👍 acidus
@daruma Appreciate it! 😁 · 1 week ago
I just stumbled around this article:
https://tasshin.com/blog/the-practice-of-friendship/ · 1 week ago
https://tasshin.com/blog/the-practice-of-friendship/
martial art dojo - music jaming - meditation community - live drawing sessions - hiking groups - hackers labs - volunteering at events - regular dance event - improv and theatre group, to name a few. Makes for meaningful connections. · 1 week ago
@whixr Thank you, I will! 😁 · 2 weeks ago
@hanzbrix It can feel sad to move on from old friends, but it is also an opportunity. There is an endless supply of awesome people out there in the world. Conferences are indeed a ready made concentration of likely folks. I've made more than a few long term close friends over the years that way. One way to accelerate that even more is to become involved as a volunteer, helping the organizers - there are no shortage of things which need to be done and they always need help - and that tends to get you invited to all the after-show get togehters and such. Good luck, and let us know how you fare! · 2 weeks ago
@whixr The conference thing is actually a good idea, appreciate it.
Yeah, part of the reason I am also losing friends fast, is that I have had to recognise that a good bunch of the ones I had, were not good people, for me. It was a lot of take, not a lot of give. · 2 weeks ago
In general if you put yourself into situations where you get to interact with new people, and stay willing to saying yes to opportunities to get together, the rest happens in the usual way.
I will add that there is real value in being selective into whom you invest time into or provide access to. Life is more fuffiling and goes better when you have the right people around. Sorting through a lot of wrong (for you) people is the cost of admission.
Conferences relating to your interests are a great place to find old friends you have not met yet. Being friendly signals that you are open. Verbalizing that you enjoy talking with someone gives them confidence too. · 2 weeks ago
@mrrobinhood5 @ wbknl @danrl So what I am hearing, is I need to get more multiplayer hobbies and then talk to everyone.
Thank you for the input, it helps when there seems to be a consensus. 😁 · 2 weeks ago
coworkers, hobbies, and radically growing out of anxiety and shyness. latter part is the hardest, i tell ya… · 2 weeks ago
i made many friends because of my hobby · 2 weeks ago
I can guarantee that others feel the same way. at 40 making friends is a numbers game. talk to everyone and it will sort itself out · 2 weeks ago
@melyanna thank you. Most of my current friends are uninvolved at the moment, so that mostly leaves work and other things.
I think I might have to take up some more public hobbies or volunteering to find new friends though. My current job is very limited in interaction with co-workers, due to the size of the organisation. · 2 weeks ago
Hi! I am 45. I have a close group of friends who have been my friends since high school. New friends I made recently are either spouses/partners/friends of this group, or coworkers.
I know many people don't like to mix personal and work life, but I am always open and friendly and I have been rewarded with some good, long lasting friendships with some of my coworkers (all of them have since moved on to a different company, however we are still friends). Other friends I have, I met when I was volunteering. · 2 weeks ago