Were that any better put, I'd be in the hunt for the killer app called "Noose"....
NOOSE(666) Desperate Commands NOOSE(666) NAME noose - end computer illiteracy frustration SYNOPSIS noose [OPTION]... DESCRIPTION Move user executing the command to a better place. -d [[HH:][MM:]SS] delay execution for specified time (default: 23 seconds) -f notify family -m post parting farewell to the Midnight Pub faithful
;-)
I suspect you're probably joking, but...
Are you OK over there?