< Hey bartender, a water please. Cold.
i'm still in college and i'm already struggling with this - in fact i have been for years. i don't want to just become a staff software engineer for the rest of my life, building out some platform for a massive company who is ruining all of us and everything around us. i want to do something good (or at least in utilitarian terms, something neutral) and be at peace. i feel an immense pressure constantly to continue down this path but also an equal and opposite reaction to it, the realization that this isn't what i want to do with the rest of my life. i don't feel like i'm in the right place, but i don't have any way to get there.
above all, i'm with you.
I try to do little things of good in everyday life. I hope to make a small difference. I might just switch to farming if this goes on any longer.