Midnight Pub

non-fatherhood

~tffb

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~orchard wrote (thread):

That is a valid decision. I think the decision ( or the wish) of parenthood entirely depends upon the kind of parenting the said person has been through. For me, I guess I would like to be there for someone same way my dad did.

~inquiry wrote:

Wish I hadn't. Had no idea what I was doing, and wasn't with someone who could have helped/challenged me in a direction that might have ended well.

Instead, there's likely permanent disassociation, and given what I know (or is it believe?) about how stories develop unassisted by those closest to ground zero of what inspired them, I can't imagine the possibility of getting "back on track".

It's just over. And it's sad because I think I have the skills to communicate with sufficient nuance. But I've no faith in others willingness - let alone ableness - to dive deeply into what others actually mean, i.e. beyond one's own meanings/interpretations/biases.

And, of course, that lack of faith would likely doom any possibilities even if said willingness/ableness were present at the other end of the waxed string whose wax has mostly melted.

~contrarian wrote (thread):

My father was pretty much the opposite of ~orchard's father. Everything was behind schedule and over budget. I know I will not reproduce. As I grow older, I cannot help but understand more and more why people have kids in the first place however.

~starbreaker wrote (thread):

Barkeep, I could use a White Lady over here. And a saucer of cream for Smudge if you've got any.

I'm 44, and I haven't had children. Just cats, and recently a dog. It's not that I didn't want to have kids; if I was determined to not have kids I would have been more consistent about wearing condoms.

Instead, my wife kinda wanted kids, and I was OK with it if it happened. We certainly had fun trying, but it just never worked out. Probably a good thing, to be honest.