There once was a six-year-old boy named Billy. Like many other children his age, Billy liked to play outside. He would wile away the hours at the playground down the street from his house, climbing the monkey bars or sliding down the slide or climbing through the colorful plastic tunnels so he could listen in on unsuspecting Boomers as they lamented the fact that kids these days were too attached to their cell phones and never went to the playground.
One Saturday morning, Billy woke up bright and early, excited to go out and play at the playground. But his parents took one look at the state of his bedroom, and what do you think they saw? That’s right; his bed wasn’t made.
“You can go to the playground after you make your bed,“ they told Billy.
Billy whined and complained. He wanted to go play with his friends! He didn’t want to be stuck inside making his stupid bed!
He tried everything to get out of this duty. He tried holding his breath. He tried crying and screaming. He tried bribing his big sister with a piece of gum to get her to make his bed. (She said no.)
As the day wore on, Billy’s bed remained unmade and he remained inside. His friends came by and knocked on the door, asking if he could come out and play. His parents gave the same answer each time: “As soon as Billy makes his bed.“
Finally, Billy relented. He straightened out the blanket so as to hide the rumpled sheets underneath, and he put his pillow in the middle of the bed rather than on the floor, where it had been. Then he went to his parents and said, “There! I made my stupid bed! NOW can I go to the playground?“
To which his parents’ response was, “What the fuck, Billy? It’s two in the morning!“
“But you SAID I could go to the playground! You promised!“ Billy tantrumed.
“It’s too late at night! It’s dangerous! Besides the playground is closed; playing there now is illegal.“
Billy continued to scream and cry, because he was six years old and he didn’t understand that by not following the directions he was given until it was too late, the situation had mutated into something different.
So when you grumble about masking up after getting your vaccine, don’t blame doctors or scientists; blame all the Billies of the world whose refusal to mask up and isolate caused the virus to mutate.