< On Impossible Standards (of the Self-Inflicted Variety)

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~zampano

It definitely *served* as a coping mechanism for me, but I won't go so far as to say it was a good (or even effective) one. On the contrary, by fetishizing my mental health the way I did, I probably delayed treatment that would've helped me. I've been in therapy basically my whole adult life, but I'm not sure how truly engaged I was with it; for much of this time, it was just another part of the glorification of the whole thing. Meanwhile, I didn't pursue anti-depressants until I was getting seriously to the end of my rope, and am just lucky I got desperate before my situation did.

I don't beat myself up over it, to be clear, but it's important for me to recognize it for what it was: a mistake.

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