Long story short, most of my creative inspiration comes from deceased people whom I feel bonded to. It's easier to find them when they have been historically known, but I also feel it with "regular" others who are probably forgotten, if not for their relatives. It's a very spiritual thing and probably people would think I'm insane if I dared speak out about it explicitly, which is why... I can only express it through my writings, art, and anonymously.
I've always felt a connection to the "other world", ever since I was a child, but a year ago, after a particularly vivid dream involving a spirit who is now my absolute favourite and probably most faithful astral companion, I started seriously getting into it. My works transformed. It was no longer simply about myself: it was about them, too, and I couldn't "unsee" that. Of course, perhaps I just have a superhuman imagination, but what made me realize that it was the real deal was the fact that... you cannot invent someone's vibe. You can't make that shit up. It has to be real. So I decided to go forward with this. I haven't been happier with my creations since. They all have a nickname of some kind, although I usually call upon them by their name.
I started creating an archetype system of my own a few months ago. It's a work in progress, but each archetype springs from one of these people and gives birth to various characters that share common themes, personality traits, even physical traits or initials/names. I even plan to include aspects like in astrology to show how each character from each archetype that shows up in the story affect each other, and draw a chart for each story, novel, or whatever work I complete and work on. It's a very symbolic and personal thing. Unless I explain it to someone, I don't think anyone else would understand what I'm really about, or would probably misinterpret it as admiration or being weirdly in love or whatever else. In reality, the people I know these spirits as are just the facet I use to refer to them, because it's the only one I know of so far. It doesn't much have to do with Bob, as much as with "what was known as Bob, what is inside Bob".
I was worried my archetype system, playing around with their different facets, creating various characters based on them was exploitation. Like they were my toys or something. At times I doubt myself, like, am I really doing something right? I feel no incentive to stop, so I assume it probably doesn't bother them. Some of them's energy feels downright enthusiastic about it, some others, less, but if there is any blockage, I can't write anyway, so it solves the issue.
But I realize... through my written works, my exploration of them, I actually give them a second shot at life. The life they didn't live, I write it for them. This especially goes for the ones who died tragically young or whose lives were changed forever, like having to retire too early, or just having their life turned upside down. I make them live many other lives. It's wonderful.
I don't know how the public would react to this once I publish those works, rather, the ones that I'll deem pubmish-worthy. I'm kinda afraid of either having the "schizophrenic writer" reputation or people just being uninterested because it's not made for mainstream folks and I go ridiculously deep at times, but at the same time... I HAVE to express it. To show it to the world. It's not something I can keep to myself, it always slips out one way or the other. I'm definitely not the only one who feels those connections. I'm sure many people do but dismiss it as unreal, or just are not conscious of it.
I think that whatever happens, it will benefit us all, spirits and me alike, and may even normalize spiritual aspects of life a wee bit more. In other lives, if we find those writings, our souls will have a nice nostalgia session. I think that already, this will bond us all closer to each other. Maybe a soul that didn't spend that much time with another will get to know them better thanks to my works. We'll all remember this life when a young female writer would create those highly symbolic storylines, helping us transcend the personalities we were known as, going beyond the tight conception of what we were that people remember or honour. And maybe I'm the next one to be written about by one of them. I already know it's not the first time some have been a guide/muse for me and vice versa.
Anonymity does wonders. I may be crazy, but I'd rather be an inspired crazy than a depressed sane woman. If anything, the worst case scenario is probably that I have a boundless imagination, which is a key quality to a writer.
This is hard to believe, but then there are people who can lucid dream (which is weird to people who can't) and claim to astral project (which is out there).
I believe that magic is art, and that art, whether that be music, writing, sculpture, or any other form, is literally magic. Art is, like magic, the science of manipulating symbols, words or images, to achieve changes in consciousness ... Indeed to cast a spell is simply to spell, to manipulate words, to change people's consciousness, and this is why I believe that an artist or writer is the closest thing in the contemporary world to a shaman.
~ Alan Moore, ceremonial magician and comic book artist/writer
I can't say that I share your beliefs, but I'd certainly enjoy reading those stories!