tl;dr:
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i'm thinking about gemini. this week i found a gemlog of a girl (i didn't know girls liked free software, this is cool) that plays bass and likes programming. but she stopped posting on her capsule because she was tired. i don't really get how people are fragile (no offenses), i'm never sad. i mean, i'm not happy everyday, but i'm not sad either. i mean (again because i'm repetitive, i don't english often), i don't get why so many of us minors are that "sad". maybe because it is cool? i see everywhere, people telling "oh i'm sad and some things", instead of being themselves and telling what is wrong, and how to fix it. i would love if people wanted to correct their lifes, but they not even try. i mean (yay!), i don't fix mine either because i can't, when i do something to better my life i get other thing wrong, but at least i try and stop saying that i'm sad and not telling why. i have open relationships with my mom, she really helps me even though sometimes she is very very rude to me. i don't really get today's society, they say they don't love anything and they want to commit suicide and things, but first they have bfs/gfs, and second they really don't want to die. i was born in 2006, and i really don't understand why people at my age are so awkward like that. i just don't get it. but hey! i'll try to fix my vim with .gmi syntax.
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i fixed!!! this was a bit inconvenient, but i managed to do it. there is this repo in tildegit that had syntax highlight to it, but it had make, and then i had to do what make does manually, and i never really had read makefiles before, so it was a bit harsh, but now i feel like i know how to do it. now i'm thinking about reading rust doc to learn rust, i've been trying but idk, i always get distracted, i start playing guitar and things. i think everything is fine now. i really need a vim status bar tho. i like the idea, but lightline didn't really worked out for me. i don't really like powerline, i think the design of that arrow thing is just annoying. there is airline too but i feel it a bit slow idk. and it feels difficult to configure. if at least i got lightline working...
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i'm trying to evangelize everyone on my whatsapp on linux, libre software and minimal internet. i just recorded a video about how gemini is minimal and things, and how easy is to setup your own capsule and such. i think nobody on my whatsapp would really switch to ubuntu in the first place, imagine about making a gemini capsule, a place where nobody besides me talk portuguese, and i'm already at whatsapp so why move? i'm a bit lonely i think, i haven't seen nobody besides mom this week. i wanted to go back at my old church, i was there frequently in 2019, but then i moved to my father's house and the pandemic came... my mom moved to another city, it is not like 10 hours distant but it is still 40 minutes away from here at foot, but as i don't have anything besides foot to go there, it wouldn't be a good thing to do. there is a church that is around 5-10 minutes from here, but i don't know nobody there too. i really would like to go back to school, even though it is one of the most hostile places i've benn ever.
i really like typing. i think it releases my feelings and thougths. i'm willing to learn LaTeX to do some homework but idk, i'm lazy. well, to be fair i don't do school anymore. i just can't. it feels very very bad doing school alone, i think the point of school is to make people be free and talk to each other, but it is not like that anymore. i had an friend, past year, that is like, going crazy of how much studying she's doing. i don't like going crazy in studying general topics such as "art" or "science". what exactly is art or science? it is a metathing. i don't know how do you say this, but we call it "matéria" on brazil. i'm not that guy that wants to learn everything from everywhere. i just like doing what i need, and what the world needs. everybody knows that nazism was bad, but the world don't really need to know what side is nazism from. this is what i don't like in school. and there's other thing - teachers. ohhh, i hate teachers. they tell you *what* to do, and not *how* and *why*. this is so bad, even the arts teacher don't develop the kids's creativity, what they do is just put what they think on the mind of that little innocent kids. this is the problem of society nowadays, everybody is kinda the same because teachers are the same, and they put their thoughts on random topics on other people's mind. if we were free of doing anything to our work in school, people would seek more the truth. i think people don't want the truth, somehow. they are just like horses with that thing that blocks their vision so they can't be distracted and just do one thing. and the world is the one that's at the horse, kicking it with one and only one thing. idk i should do my dotfiles.
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i want a new ftp client. lately, i've been using ftp to share files between my phone (it is a moto c btw, the most crappy in the planet) and my pc (should i say my specs?). i use gftp now, but it looks very bad & is a bit slow, i wanted to have a terminal client to do it. i tried the ftp command but i couldn't get it connected. i also need a irc client, or at least a tutorial on how to use irssi/weechat. i tried both, i kinda succeeded on weechat but i didn't found it that usable. i will do more research on ftp & irc, so yeah.
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i did some research, found nothing. i'm a bit tired, i should probably sleep but i wont. played some guitar, recorded myself, still sound crap. the last thing i played was Bach, the Adagio from Violin Sonata 1. yes, i play violin pieces on guitar. actually, i would rather play violin than guitar. but that's topic for other time. the point is that i remembered a girl, a very nice girl, the reason i have instagram. her name is Sumina Studer, if you play classical music and heard paganini 5 probably she was the performer. i really like her, i don't know. like, i really like her seriously, sometimes i think i'm her friend. sometimes i tell people that she's my friend. i would really love to talk with her but she has things to do, she seems busy and a bit freaked out of being a "famous violinist". i don't think she is as she deserves, but still, it is a lot. i think she has around 130K on youtube and 80K on instagram, but she's not that active on youtube. i don't like only her playing, but all about her, she seems like the most interesting person in the world. i want to talk with her, tried dming in instagram since past year, she never responded to me. a month ago or something she responded my comment on some post, but it was a bit generic like "that's true [smiling emoji]". i just wanted a real talk with someone that's not a retard, probably older people aren't but i never talk to them. the only people i really talk nowadays is my mom and sometimes my aunt. Sumina seems interesting, and i'm always thinking about her and things. i should probably find a way to delete my instagram and access her content without one. but it is too much work, i made it with a temp mail already, i don't think it will spy that much, compensating the advantages i have. actually, she said that most of her friends are from internet, maybe that means that it would be easier to talk to her? but i don't see myself talking to her in at least 1 year after that comment reply. i don't know she is so cool. and i uploaded my dotfiles but my ssh is not configured so it pops up that annoying thing asking for my password, i tried fixing it but qutebrowser won't pass the ddos checker. f* gitlab. i want to find a good github/gitlab alternative. i already tried sourcehut, but they'll make it a paid service when beta releases. tildegit looks cool, but idk. i really just need some place to put my files there and change them, even syncing with a vps would be ok for me, i don't do ci things or whatever they are called. <F9><F10><F11><F12>.
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fuck it i'll sleep i'm bored
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good morning, i guess. i didn't sleep that well, i actually got to sleep around 5AM, so yeahhh. i've read the news, nothing that special. "government punish you if you have two devices connected in the same whatsapp account". ahhh i love how they just want to make things worse.
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i'm a bit bored. my friend is trying to do "hacking" with termux on android, with one of that "virus creator", basically being a home common hacker. i dont like it. i want a buckling spring keyboard but mom would hate me then, they are LOUD. i had breakfast[1], it was cool
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i'm sad. i want to go to my old church. there was very very cool. and i'm catholic btw. so yeah. i think i'll learn rust.
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why do i never learn rust when i open the site? anyways, i was learning Bach Sonata 1 and its so fucking hard[2]. my fingers are bleeding, i'm in complete pain and sumina can perform it with eyes closed on a instrument that is way harder than mine. am i sad? no. it is great music after all, it compensates the pain to learn.
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i give up. trying chaconne, it is actually harder, why did i pick this to learn wtf. sad because sumina didn't post anything, but at least i'm making progress on the guitar idk. and my samba is actually very good, i'm doing well with barre chords.
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i just gave up in marking the hour i leave, i'm forgetting it. today i made my first one line command with more than 1 pipe, and it was "cat (this document) | grep -i ## | wc -l". i think i'm getting efficient at the shell.
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just took a bath, i feel good now. but still sad sumina haven't posted anything yet, not even her lunch. i like seeing other people's lunch, and talking about it my mom just bring me the spaghetti with tometoes and some cool stuff with it. i'll take a pic and link it down here:
well, going back to the topic, i like seeing how healthy people are. and i like being healthy, if i see other peoples lunch i can copy them if they are healthy and i like the food. well idk let me eat this marvelous lunch i have now. peace
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sad because sumina didn't post nothing, again. maybe she is very busy since it's saturday and students love having classes at saturday for some reason (definetively not work). i want to know more and more about html and css, so that i can work with that instead of bloating web pages with nasty js. i want to work in it some day, but idk where to go. maybe i would be a sysadmin since i live in the terminal already, and i dont use anything besides the terminal. but for that, i would need to study more about network and stuff. i'm sad i just want to see sumina once more in life. i helped mom with their bills, had to negotiate it because it is a bit pending, like 10 years or so. i love don't having credit cards.
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found out that the annonying thing at the back of my head is actually a pimple. i've ended with it (idk how to conjugate that, here we call it "estourar", or "pop" the pimple).
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ok, watched some Chaves, or maybe as you know, Chavo del 8. now my cousin is getting here to see if i can rebirth his PS3 (i think, maybe ps2 but yeah both are very very popular here). i've learned a new song, Trem das Onze, a very well known brazilian classical. it talks about a guy who lives in Jaçanã, that is discussing with his gf about going to home, because the only train that goes there is that train that part 11PM, and he can't stay with the girl. i think this kind of thing is mostly dead, first because people don't really want serious relationships anymore, second because uber and things. well, at least the part that says that moms stay awake waiting her only son is true i guess. i'm the only son of my mmom, and i can see how she suffers with me. and that is even with me inside.
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fuck, i was going to post this yesterday buut, my cousin came here and asked if i could stay in his house this night. at the end, there was me, him and a friend. they smoking weed, me playing need for speed, and they going sleep 2am, me going 5am, everything fine. this morning, we just eat a bread with margarine and some black coffee. next, we got to a skate park (he likes skate a lot)(it was right next to my house) and he tried to teach me some tricks. i learned how to pass by edges without having to ollie, and i almost learnt how to varial (basically a 180, but easier). it was cool, i guess, now i like skate. well, i've just arrived home, at night i'll post another log. i think, goodbye! stay safe.
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Email: vitorgonc56@protonmail.com (i don't have a vps to host my own)
Monero: 86MmHZzK6vWYvMjiEgdJwoGYvUPQG9xf9QJndJp2rZPXTR1CVkrdfrXG7ajipJPFVsXnqHVgxeENZ7zVyhzEiaURPnVWbp4
My GitLab (it has nothing, i don't program but i plan to every millenium or so)
Mastodon: @vitorgonc56@mastchan.org
Good night!