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Another Entry in the Gemlog of dazlab.
Over the last few months I have been on somewhat of a personal development journey; having been suffering from a relatively rare, though not entirely uncommon, bout of clinical depression, I've come to realise what I need to do is cast aside a lot of the mental baggage I'm holding on to. To be honest, I'm still in the midst of this process.
Part of my malaise is no doubt due to my persistent habit of straying off course, trying to do things I'm not meant to be doing, trying to be something I'm not. I have to constantly realign myself, and if I don't do this I fall into The Dark.
I believe everyone carries inside them an inherent 'beacon', a sort of range finder; though many - including me - don't often listen to it, perhaps aren't even consciously aware of it, I believe it is there nonetheless.
I've been trying really hard to listen to my inner Beacon, and what it's telling me is that I'm not living the life I'm supposed to be living; not being true to myself. And the worst thing a person can be is dishonest with themself.
So. I've been reading a lot, and I've been writing a lot. I suppose I'm trying to detach myself from the world of digital escapism I've surrounded myself with; unhealthy obsessions, mindless hours spent scrolling through social media - I like to think of YouTube as being outside of the realm of 'Social Media', but, in truth, it carries the same dangers.
I'm not sure I can offer any insight and/or solutions for anyone reading this, maybe experiencing similar struggles, but I didn't want to let this space decay. Although the majority of my writing is being done analog, I'm going to make an effort to keep this little corner of geminispace alive.