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steve_dracula on Station

author: steve_dracula

2024-01-12 21:25 UTC

Based on the child's reaction to me bellowing "No, *I'M* gonna shit your pants", I'm pretty certain that I have finally mastered parenting.

· 3 Replies · 6 Thumbs

2023-12-06 15:38 UTC

Secret hint: When trapped in the bathroom, spam your wife with Beavis & Butthead GIFs until she figures out that you need TP for your bunghole.

· 2 Replies · 2 Thumbs

2023-11-30 12:01 UTC

My wife is refusing to get me additional wives for my birthday.

· 6 Replies · 0 Thumbs

2023-11-16 12:08 UTC

Ladies Love Shoulder Hair

· 1 Reply · 0 Thumbs

2023-10-26 10:38 UTC

Cheap entertainment: when talking to. A Car Person, refer to one of the various car fluids as "juice".

· 1 Reply · 4 Thumbs

2023-09-07 11:10 UTC

I have several children, but zero of them would like their names changed to Igbert Wigbert Pigbert. Parenting is an unending string of disappointments.

· 1 Reply · 1 Thumb

2023-06-20 10:53 UTC

Morning earworm: Springtime for Hitler. I hope I don’t start singing it on the train. Or that I do. Whichever is funnier.

· 2 Replies · 5 Thumbs

2023-06-08 14:49 UTC

It would be cool if the air had less fire in it.

· 3 Replies · 6 Thumbs

2023-06-02 11:55 UTC

Found a scotch bonnet salsa at the farmer’s market last week. I liked it on its way in, but I do not like it anymore.

· 5 Replies · 1 Thumb

2023-05-03 23:10 UTC

Today’s disappointing Spellbinding non-word: helicycle.

· 5 Replies · 0 Thumbs

2022-06-01 13:14 UTC

Secret hint: the constant evangelizing is why nobody likes evangelicals. It’s right there in the name.

· 4 Replies · 1 Thumb

2022-05-15 23:06 UTC

Suspicion: If my wife ever stops speaking, she will instantly die.

· 0 Replies · 0 Thumbs