💾 Archived View for alioop.flounder.online › motherhood › 10months.gmi captured on 2024-08-31 at 12:02:44. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
⬅️ Previous capture (2024-06-16)
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she loves to wave
she waves at us when we walk in a room
at strangers walking their dog
at the tree outside
at photos
at her mobile
at other babies
and she will wave when she sees her reflection
she loves to clap
she lights up with the biggest smile
when you sing “if you’re happy and you know it”
and she will clap when you clap
and she will clap when you ask her to clap without clapping yourself
and sometimes she will clap
with one hand open and one hand in a fist
and she will clap when she sees her reflection
she is sleeping 11 hours in a row
except recently when she was teething
she finally has a tooth!
two in fact
small ones poking through the front bottom
she can’t gum my finger
or bite my nose anymore
without it hurting
that’s how i discovered her first tooth
when her father set her down on me
to wake me up
and she gently went to bite my nose
and i felt something small and sharp
“a tooth! it’s here!”
she is crawling
and pulling up
and cruising
when we hold her hands up to see if she wants to walk
she will sometimes take steps
but is usually too happy, bouncing
and will leap towards us smiling
she can climb steps like a pro
fearless now
one and then another
it started on the playground
and now she can tackle our flight of five at home
but we have yet to try the tall set of steps
she loves to eat
she loves to use her new teeth to eat
to crunch on celery and apples
and tear corn tortillas and cheese
she is antsy to eat more
chomping off too-big bites of bread
she loves to drink water out of sippy cups
she still is drinking bottles
no longer at the breast
but still sleepily
contentedly
dreamily
eating in our arms before naps
and bedtime
the bedtime routine
diaper
massage
“vitamin d” drops
(water drops now)
pajamas
sleep sack
binky
waving goodnight to our neighbors
waving hello to the blinds and curtains and video monitor
waving goodnight to the park and backyard and tree
waving hello to the blinds and curtains
saying hello to the pink light and fan
(we say the same script each time)
cozying up in the recliner with the bottle
and she will drink and play with my hair or my fingers or her fingers or her foot
sometimes she will sit up taller and rest her head on my chest while she eats
other times she sinks down lower in my arms
and her eyes will droop and sometimes she will nod off while eating
but usually she will pull away when she is done, just like always
sometimes calling out for her father’s attention if it is nighttime and he is laying on the floor, waiting for us,
and i will offer her the bottle for more
or the binky if she is done
and she will take the binky confidently in her hands and put it in her mouth herself
and close her eyes and know that i’ll take care of her
and we sing twinkle twinkle little star together
her father harmonizing at the end
and we kiss her and tell her we love her and to have sweet dreams and say we will see her when she wakes up
her eyelashes are longer than mine
i swear
her hair is growing in more and more
the swirl getting thicker
and maybe small curls are starting
or maybe it’s just bed head
everyone agrees it has a reddish tinge in the sunlight
her fingernails grow fast
and they are dangerous as she explores our faces with her fingers
and her toes are sticky with fuzzies unless they are wrapped in socks
her eyes have stayed bright
and can have an impish twinkle
especially when fetching her from her naps
or if she looks back at you when you tell her “no”
and she has a new smile
still big
still lighting up her whole face
the whole room
but now with two small teeth that have poked their way through her bottom gum
her left upper gum dips a little lower than the right
and we are expecting another tooth there any day
her laugh is more forthcoming now
big squeals
giggles squished in the throat
as her whole face crinkles in delight
her eyebrows arched dramatically
it comes when i kiss her belly
when i squeeze her in a hug
(a “mommy squeeze,” the mention alone making her smile)
when i chase her on the swing
when daddy grabs her legs and makes her kick the top of his head
or when she grabs his mustache or glasses
my most treasured moments are when we are still
when she is asleep in my arms
or eating a bottle
or sitting on the blanket in the backyard in the leaf dappled sunlight
while she wears her floppy hat
that she will soon tug off her head
and in each of these moments i remind myself to breathe
to take in every detail
to remember the feeling of her soft skin on the back of my hand
and the weight of her on my lap
and the way the sunlight illuminates her face as she ponders a blade of grass that she has pulled from the earth and holds between her tiny fingers
the way she might be considering its greenness
or its thinness
or its smoothness
or its novelty
before slowly raising it to her open mouth to eat it
and i break my stillness spell to reach with lightning quickness to stop her
and then resume my meditation as her attention moves elsewhere
and continue to sit in the moment
with her
so i can go back to that moment in my mind whenever
so i can be there
with her
forever