💾 Archived View for sleepycrow.cities.yesterweb.org › writings › asriel.gmi captured on 2024-05-26 at 14:46:23. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
⬅️ Previous capture (2022-06-03)
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soppy trash written way back when, sometime after the release of deltarune ch.1, when I was simping hard for azzy <3
they're not great, but I still have a bit of a soft spot for 'em, so I guess I can keep 'em here. ordered in chronological order.
also, most of these are heavily based on the "traumatized Asriel" trope often found in fan works about the aforementioned fluffy goat, so TW for anxiety, medication and general mental health fuckery. consider yourself warned!
It was already dark outside when you left the cinema, Asriel in tow. It's odd to think that the fluffy goat walking through the crowd alongside you was deathly afraid to even leave the house just a few months ago. You begin to think back to that time, but are quickly taken out of your thoughts when he rests his head on your shoulder. You give him a quick peck on the cheek and take out your car keys as you enter the parking garage and approach the car.
"Thanks for taking me out, Anon. I'm sorry for being so much of a dead weight, I'm just..." Asriel starts, but before he can finish you pull him into a long, passionate kiss that leaves you both gasping for air.
After your lips part, the goat stutters for a few seconds in a struggle to say something, before eventually giving up and resorting to simply blushing and looking down at his feet in an attempt to hide that cute, heart-warming smile of his that you've come to love so much.
"Don't you ever call yourself that, Azzy."
While Asriel's meds and your company may help him deal a little better with his social avoidance, they do little to stop the nightmares, you are reminded for the nth time that week as you rub your eyes to see your goat boyfriend sitting on the bed, having a panic attack.
"I-I'm sorry A-anon. J-just go back to s-sleep, I'll be f-fine..." Asriel tries his best to calm you down, but the breathlessness of his whisper and the damp fur under his eyes betrays him.
Against your boyfriend's wishes, you sit up and wrap your arms around him in a tight hug and whisper a quiet "oh honey..." into his floppy ears.
"I'll be fine. R-really..." he tries once more, his voice noticably quivering now "J-just go back to sleep. I d-don't w-want to be any more of a burden..."
"Not until you do, sweetheart. I can't bear to see you hurting."
At first, Asriel doesn't reply. Instead, he simply sits there, shivering silently, eyes closed. After a few seconds, you can hear him start sobbing quietly, before returning your embrace and breaking down into tears completely.
"i c-an't un-ders-stand w-why you l-ov-e me s-so m-u-ch" he manages between bawls "y-you'd be s-o much be-tter o-off without me..."
"Shh... It'll be fine..." you ignore his laments and continue whispering as you rock him back and forth slowly "I love you."
As dawn broke and the first rays of light pierced the thin curtain on your bedroom windows you opened your eyes to see the soft thing pressing into your side was not a pillow, but Asriel's chest fluff. With how warm and soft it was, it was hard to resist the temptation to fall back asleep, but somehow, you'd managed to pull yourself out of the bed and get dressed. You wanted to suprise your boyfriend today, and he wasn't going to stop you, no matter how soft and warm and lovable he was - you mused to yourself as you entered the kitchen and gathered the ingedients you needed.
By the time you heard a soft yawn come from the bedroom you were already finishing up in the kitchen. You quickly put a cup of milk and plate of pancakes you'd just made on a tray and went back into the bedroom.
"Good morning, honey! I made you some breakfast!" you said as you placed the tray on his lap
"Oh wow... T-thank you! C'mere, let me give you a kiss!" he beckoned you back into bed.
As you climbed back onto the mattress, Asriel quickly put the tray aside and pulled you in for a passionate kiss that left you breathless as he whispered into your ear.
"I love you, sunshine."
Thank god for weekends.
As you opened the door to your house you were suprised to find it completely dark and quiet, as if nobody besides you lived there - an unusual occurence ever since Asriel moved in with you. Usually whenever you came back home he'd be laying on the couch nose-deep in some fantasy book, ready to welcome you with a warm hug and a "How was your day?". This time however, there was no sign of life anywhere in the house.
"A-anon?" you suddenly heard a quiet, groggy voice ask from the bedroom.
You rushed towards the bedroom to greet your boyfriend, but before you could get there he ran out of the room and barged into you, taking you into a warm hug. The two of you stood there, hugging in the unlit salon for a good few minutes before he let you go. When he finally did and you got a good look at him, you noticed he looked like he hadn't gotten out of bed at all that day. You looked deep into his bloodshot eyes, hugged from underneath by matted fur and your heart sank. Despite his medication, days like that still occured - days where he'd just lay in bed all day, alternating between just feeling like crap and crying into the pillows.
"Oh honey..." was all you managed to say before pulling him back into a hug
"I-I'm sorry. I've had a bit of a r-rough day I guess..."
"It's okay, honey. It's okay... Have you eaten anything?"
"n-no..."
"Let's get you something to eat. Come on." you said as you broke the embrace and lead him into the kitchen
Your front door's lock clicked quietly as you turned the handle and opened the door, nearly collapsing onto the floor in front of it as you stumbled forward tiredly.
"Howdy, honey! How was your day?" Asriel said from the couch as he turned his head to look at you.
A quiet groan was all you could muster up in response before collapsing onto the couch next to him.
"Haha, I think I can understand that." he scooted closer to you, patting his lap invitingly.
You wasted no time responding to the silent invitation, quickly placing your head on your boyfriend's lap.
"There, there, anon. You need some rest." he said as he started running his paws through your hair. "Wanna watch a movie, maybe?"
You excitedly shook your head 'yes', as best as you could given it was currently being held down by Asriel.
"Alright, I'll make us some popcorn and you pick the movie."
Within a few minutes, the both of you were back on the couch, this time leaning on eachother under a blanket, a bowl of popcorn on the table in front of you and a remote in your beloved's hand.
"Right, let's get this started." he said as he pressed the play button on the remote control and put his arm on your shoulder
Out of nowhere, you gave your boyfriend a peck on the cheek, to which he quickly responded by pulling you into a long, romantic kiss.
"I love you, sweetheart." he said, looking deep into your eyes, a smile stretching widely across his muzzle.
You didn't remember much after that - the next thing you knew it was morning and you were in your sleeping boyfriend's warm embrace on the couch.
It was odd, thinking back to the time you were lonely and depressed, you realised as you walked alongside Asriel through the snow-covered park. All these suicidal thoughts seemed so distant, now that there was somebody that really, truely loved you walking besides you, his warm, fluffy arm resting on your shoulder, touching the back of your neck, or at least the small bit of it that wasn't being covered by your jacket.
It's been a while since any one of you said anything, you realised, yet somehow you didn't feel uncomfortable. Just him being there was enough to make any situation comfortable. It even felt somewhat wrong breaking the silence to remind your boyfriend that you love him.
"I love you too, anon." he smiled your way
"Why?" you asked, those nasty thoughts still in back your mind
"Why wouldn't I, silly?" he replied, before pulling you into a kiss
You closed your eyes, allowing yourself to be lost in the romantic act.
For a while, everything seemed so peaceful. Then you woke up.
...
You were back in your room, laying on your messy bed. You looked at the clock - it was 4PM, not that it really mattered to you. Ever since you got laid off, you'd started spending more and more time lucid dreaming, so you could get as much time with your boyfriend as you possibly could. You'd lost track of time a few days ago, but you didn't really need to know the time, anyway. All you needed was something to eat, and some more sleep.
You knew this wasn't healthy, you knew you shouldn't be doing this, but you didn't care anymore. You'd gone numb quite a while ago. Besides, as long as you had someone who loved you, everything would be okay.
As you looked at the tall, fluffy goat monster sleeping in your bed, you couldn't help but smile. It seemed so surreal that someone as amazing as him could chose someone like you to love, and yet... the evidence was lying right before your eyes, in all of it's sleepy adorableness.
It almost seemed wrong as you laid down next to him, stirring him from his still light sleep.
"Mmh... C'mere Anon..." he mumbled sleepily as he wrapped his arms around you and pulled you towards himself with a newly-formed content smile on his face.
"Good night, sweetheart." he mumbled before falling back asleep.
this goat is ruining my fucking life
tfw no Asriel boyfriend to give you a tight hug when you return home
ywn notice he's holding you a bit more tighly than usual
ywn notice he's holding the hug for a little longer than usual
ywn notice the little bits of clumped, still damp fur under his eyes
ywn ask him what's wrong
he will never try to convince you that everything's fine, not wanting to worry you after an exhausting day of work
ywn jokingly point out he's not a good liar
ywn convince him to finally tell you about the sense of guilt and worthlessness he still feels for his actions as flowey
ywn have him break down and cry into your chest as you soothingly run your hands in circles on his back
he will never slowly but surely calm down in your arms
he will never start profusely apologizing for being a terrible boyfriend and bothering you with stupid stuff after you come home tired
ywn tell him he's being silly and give him a kiss
ywn get to reassure him
ywn force him to look up from the ground and into your eyes and tell him you love him
ywn get to hear him say "I love you too, anon"