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So I've been messing around with engraving glass and it's easier than I thought it would be. Easier than stainless steel. I'm not sure why I got it in my head it would be more challenging, glass seemed somehow scary?, but I've had no trouble with anything breaking so far. I'm working in the garage and wearing a good dust mask. I've been buying exclusively carbide bits for metal, but diamond grit bits are what you want for glass. Fortunately I did have a cheap set of assorted diamond bits on hand and they worked fine.

Besides engraving recycled glass jars in general, a couple friend of ours got married no-fuss courthouse style and I wanted to make them a wedding gift, because it's kind of sad when you get married and there's no fanfare (speaking from experience). They have kids (the tasmanian devil kids that went batshit in our backyard) so I didn't want to give them recycled jar cups because the rims are more fragile than standard glasses and I figured that plus tasmanian devil children would lead to a predictable, potentially bloody end at urgent care. So I got a pair of hefty 16oz glass beer mugs from target for $10 and I was able to engrave characters from a favorite show (Over the Garden Wall) with some quotes in a nice script. The kids will have to work to break those suckers. Pleased with how it turned out and was able to give them something unique on short notice. On the one hand a pair of beer mugs isn't much, but they're custom and you can't buy anything like it short of maybe Etsy. I feel like it's a decent gift.

But there are some differences between working on steel and glass that I haven't ironed out. On steel I coat the surface with watercolor paint and transfer a black and white laser print of the art on it. I can't use watercolor paint on glass because of the need to use water while grinding (I did end up working mostly dry but I feel like I should work wet, perhaps a mist sprayed on the surface or something - I tried dipping the bit in water and that did jack shit but it came out fine so ...). I got some folkart enamel glass paint - not fancy, at walmart for $3 a bottle. At first I was thinking about a complicated process of painting an area and engraving over it, then more painting and engraving to layer on a multi toned design, but as it turns out the paint doesn't bond well to the glass until it's cured at 350deg, so it's possible to easily scrub the paint off the glass up until baking it in the oven. That made things easier. I was able to use the glass paint just like the watercolor paint - coat the glass with it and then transfer the laser print on the paint. I ended up scrubbing the paint off after the first pass of engraving and then doing a cleanup pass. I really wanted to add more paint afterward to "color in" the engraved parts to add contrast and make the engraving stand out, but the paint doesn't stick in the groove as well as you'd think. You can't rub it in with a paper towel and be done. The paint ends up really washed out and transparent and I doubt there's enough to bond well enough in the curing process to withstand the dishwasher long term. I ran out of time to fiddle around with paint and had to give it to them plain.

Now I'm wondering if I can just use regular cheap craft paint to transfer the design on glass. Do the engraving, scrub off the paint, and then go in with the glass paint for coloring the engraving and adding details. I'll have to figure out a fast reliable technique to get the paint in the engraving. Maybe a small soft squeegee or something. I got these things they call a fine line painting pen or a paint chip pen. It's a tiny metal cup with a fine hollow tip similar to a mechanical pencil and a handle attached. Put paint in the cup, draw with the fine tip. I'm wondering if that might help to fill in the engraving, better than a brush, if I can get the paint at the right flowing consistency.

I got the folkart enamel glass paint in white, black and gold. The gold is frustratingly transparent and I'll probably have to use a opaque deep yellow or golden brown as an underlayer if I don't want to waste a bunch of time painting multiple layers to get coverage. Also folkart makes a clear medium that you can use either as a protective clear coat or to mix paints. Nobody in town sells it so I had to order a bottle off amazon for like $7 which is ridiculous for paint you can buy at walmart. I wonder if you can mix the clear medium with fine ground pigments - like I have some fancy color shift pigments. I wonder if the heat of baking will toast the pigments and ruin the color ... There's experimentation to be done.

I also found out liquitex makes a glass medium you can mix with their artist quality acrylic paints. Of course nobody in town carries it either. I hate ordering art supplies online - it's a crap shoot if you'll get something dried out or frozen or leaked all inside the packaging. But I might get some anyway to compare to the folkart paint. See what works best.

This is fun because I can recycle jars into cups and then engrave them and add some paint and make a neat thing for dirt cheap especially now I have all the tools. I ended up having to order more of the wet dry sandpaper in various grits off amazon. The assortment in hardware stores is limited and pricey. I also got a 5" velcro disc thingy that attaches to a drill. Then you get the velcro backed wet dry sandpaper discs and slap it on - I'm hoping it will be a good shortcut for grinding and smoothing the cut rims. (Also the disc attachment came with thick velcro backed sponges and I used the drill to power clean the bathtub and it works so great - I am never hand scrubbing the tub again!)

I'm curious about working on different types of glass, like borosilicate. I also kinda want to play with engraving ceramic coffee mugs, too. But for now I have plenty of recycled jars to work on.

I don't know exactly what I'll do with these recycled cups, besides gifts. Mostly I just want to make stuff first, figure out what to do with it later.

Ugh, I twisted my knee when we were raking snow off the roof. I had snowshoes on and I was trying to climb on top of this 3' pile of snow. There was no easy slope to the top, just 3' straight sides. So I'm clumsily trying to get on top with these awkward snowshoes and I was thinking "this is very stupid" to myself and then my knee POPPED and I had to faceplant in the snow to stop myself from making sad howling noises and scaring the neighbors. I could walk afterward and finish snow removal but my knee joint was feeling weirdly loose and sometimes hurt when I stepped wrong. I think I tore a side ligament. It's been about 3-4 weeks and it's mostly better, sometimes tender, and I still have to be careful about twisting motions and getting on my knees. I've been avoiding outdoor walks because of the ice and unstable footing. I have been walking on the treadmill at the fancy gym, plus I can bake myself in the sauna afterward and that is very very nice. So I've been doing that. I'm hoping it's healed 100% soon.

My aunt's graveside service is scheduled for april. I texted my mom but it's pertinent details only. She will rugsweep and never talk about the fact that I was radio silent for 3 years if she can help it. I'm going to have to get her alone and have an in person talk when I go down for the service.

We finished the Deadlands campaign with the gaming group and now the same GM is switching to a savage worlds superhero setting. I like superheros okay but I've never thought to myself, wow, I really want to play a superhero character. Especially with being burned out on marvel movies, a superhero setting doesn't do much for me. But whatever, fun is guaranteed with our RPG group regardless so why not make superheroes. Well we started character creation and the setup is we're low level supers in a world where powers are common, but most people have party trick level powers. We're students going to the local community college. There's a fancy college for superheros in the capitol city but we don't have the juice to get in. I suggest we watch mystery men, because that is some quality superhero inspo. Anyway, for lack of better ideas (I originally wanted to play a chameleon/shapeshifter so I could make BANK on onlyfans but the GM says the year is 2005 so there goes that plan) I decide I'm gonna make a character inspired by the Spleen in mystery men. I make a sentient fart.

Our gm has limited us to the lowest power tier (smart) but I feel like we still have plenty of rope to hang ourselves with. My character has a permanent gaseous form and she can stun people with farts, she can make people instantly sick with gut issues so they shit their pants, she can explode like a bomb (if exposed to fire, because farts are flammable). She does mostly stun damage and fatigue levels so she isn't a heavy hitter but I feel like she's able to do quite a lot despite being low power. She wears an old astronaut suit to contain herself for the benefit of people around her, but she has trouble keeping a job, making friends, etc. Not powered enough to be a pro hero, and her powers aren't practical or "sexy" so she struggles. She wants to get her degree, maybe a doctorate, work in biotech, maybe find a solution to fixing her problem of being nothing but stinky gas.

Spouse is playing an emo theater geek with a stutter and a voodoo curse. By day he is super awkward, but at night he undergoes a personality shift and he's confident and has flying powers and can turn intangible and has lasers and stuff. We've also got a "She-hulk" character obsessed with building her fitness influencer brand on social media (I pointed out there is no facebook or instagram presence in 2005 like there is now and influencers won't be a thing until 2010, plus cell phones have shit cameras and data is expensive, but the GM waves it off saying that technology is artificially accelerated due to the alien invasion that happened on 9/11 and gifted humanity a bunch of advanced tech), a rigger/hacker character who can control technology and licks batteries, and another character whose superpower is money and he has a bunch of robot minions (kinda like a cross between Fred from Big Hero Six and Megamind). We're supposed to be good guys. She-hulk started a campus superhero club for the exposure and photo ops and we're supposed to be doing community outreach stuff like picking up litter and helping elderly people shovel their sidewalks. My character is in the club because she needs some positive stuff to put on her resume after she botched her application to the superhero college and caused half the interview panel to shit their pants. There was a lawsuit over cleaning fees and something about a "biological attack" and her superhero learner's permit is on probation and she needs to build up some goodwill to prove she isn't on the villain track.

So we have our first session yesterday and our friend who plays the She-hulk copy has bought a ridiculous hot pink velour tracksuit, dyed her hair and added clip in extensions, wore "boots with the fur", did her makeup with sparkly glitter eyeshadow, already has her custom mini printed and basically cosplayed the heck out of her character. Really showed the rest of us up. Now I'm trying to scrape together some kind of astronaut costume, because I can't let her win. Spouse is like, you should have got that NASA flightsuit when we were in Huntsville at the rocket museum. Rats! You never know when you'll need a NASA flightsuit! There's a space suit printed hoodie on amazon (I thought about getting a white coverall and painting it like a space suit, but coveralls have tricky sizing and are inconvenient for bathroom breaks). I think I'm going to get that and take the spare lens for my uvex face shield (that I got for yardwork and working with power tools and painting, etc.) and put a gold mirror tint on it. I can spray paint the visor parts white. It has a decent space helmet look. It's not as good as a full helmet, but I can raise and lower the visor part and it'll get the point across.

And yeah, naturally our characters spent the whole first session causing stupid havoc. We got in three different fights, made enemies of a gang selling a superpower enhancing drug, etc. My characters's pants-shitting power is effective and disgusting. I almost feel bad for our GM. Almost. He wants to give us more super points to spend on powers and I'm like, dude, that is a terrible idea. Don't reward us. You know She-hulk is a rabid min-maxer and lives to break game systems. Only ruin will come of this. I like the scrappiness of lower powered heroes. I like fighting bad guys that ride the bus.

I made chili for game night. Heavy on the beans and onions. I can fart at the game table in character now. It's glorious.

To prep for the game, spouse and I got around to watching Ms Marvel and the Marvels. You know, I don't think either are as bad as people made it out to be. It's not among my favorite avengers content, but it was fine. Ms Marvel has some fun moments especially in the first half of the series. Almost all superhero content requires massive suspension of disbelief because the plots are gobbledygook. Bad guys are pulling a spaceballs and stealing a planet's atmosphere? Sure, whatever, cue the running and screaming and fight scene. It doesn't really matter exactly how the planet is getting destroyed, because if you think too hard about any instant planet killing device, it's simply not serious. Ms Marvel and the Marvels are just regular middle-of-the-pack offerings, lightweight and forgettable with no suspense. They suffer from being in the post-endgame glut more than anything, where they're trying to razzle-dazzle introduce a bunch of new faces (I think Rambeau is a waste of screen time - Captain Marvel can benefit from a spunky sidekick character like Ms Marvel, but Rambeau is too straightman, requires too much suspension of disbelief (oh your dead best friend's daughter just happens to develop complementary major super powers??) and is frankly boring because her only reason to exist is to serve as a cheap emotional goad for Captain Marvel).

I'm not even going to touch the "girl power" angle (okay I'm going to touch it a little bit). The whole movie exists because these sorry screenwriters don't have a goddamn clue how to write (or aren't allowed to write) a character like Captain Marvel in a real, human way. They torture into existence this "entanglement" plot device as a way of confronting Captain Marvel's emotional discomfort and shame over the fallout of her kneejerk actions. Now there's something genuinely interesting - having massive power and seeing the consequences of your actions play out over a whole planet and having to suck it up and patch up what you ruined. Great power, great responsibility, the thing, you know. But they couldn't give Captain Marvel the agency of doing that herself - she was passive and sad in her spaceship until the other two got cosmically glued to her like a perverse therapy exercise. Literally the whole movie is a therapy exercise if your therapist were all powerful and supremely condescending. Superman wouldn't need two dudebros surgically attached to his butt to figure out he was feeling bad about hurting bystanders. He'd literally look around and furrow his brow and then fix that shit in a 30 second montage with some heroic background music and move on to something else. Because Superman isn't written as a passive character, but Captain Marvel has to be so the MCU can keep going as scripted. Earth's most powerful hero has to mope out in space somewhere for years so the other heroes get the spotlight and make more movies, right? Much like the whole plot, the characters aren't meant to be thought about too hard. Which is a shame because the characters are what makes us care about the wacky hijinks the plot asks us to accept.

So the plot scale is too big now and storytelling is incoherent and tedious as a result. But I think people forget the days of Halle Berry Catwoman or Batman & Robin or the Birds of Prey TV series. There is some shitty, shitty superhero content out there and Ms Marvel and the Marvels is nowhere near the bottom tier. Sure, it's the storytelling meal equivalent of a hot dog, but it's a hebrew national kosher hot dog vs the bar s hotdog. You ever made the mistake of buying bar s hotdogs? I don't think they are food.

Anyway, yeah, it's just an average modern superhero show. It's like a futuristic looking car with a beautiful glossy paint job, but pop the hood and it's a 4 banger recycled from a junkyard dodge neon, or maybe a lawnmower motor, I don't know. It does start when you turn the key, so ... enjoy the ride while it lasts, but stay off the highway?

(I'm salty because they still haven't given us more of Yelena from Black Widow. The only fucking add-on character that seems interesting and they are wasting her. You idiots. Kate Bishop is trash.)

Spouse is gone on a trip so I messed around with the grey project. It's been over two years since I started and since I only get around to it maybe 3-4 times a year, I have plenty left. At this rate it'll lose effectiveness before I run out (I am glad I packaged it with longevity in mind). So I try to use the chances I get. I really like renting one of the public use cabins but travel is dicey in winter, and spouse doesn't have much notice for his trips sometimes so it's hard to plan. If I plan a self-holiday when he's here, I feel guilty about the cost and not including him. Anyway I've just stayed at home the past couple of times to keep it simple. I do some house cleaning and I get some nice food and have an evening. It's always interesting, but unpredictable in strength, and I get a hangover headache afterward so it's not always some amazing euphoric relaxing thing. It takes some effort to plan and set up. Past few times I just try to enjoy the experience for what it is and not try to get philosophical about it. I enjoy the beautiful visuals and I think about art. I think about recognizing beauty and what makes beauty universal. I think about what messages it can send.

So this time I thought I'd actually try to make some art. I got the table cleared off and got my art supplies ... and then realized I got a spicy packet this time and I was going to be too high to make anything. Ha ha, oops. I should have taken half.

And oh my gosh, I got the worst self-insult this time. It's hard to explain coherently, but I was looking up at the popcorn ceiling in the bedroom that was temporarily this gorgeous living carved alabaster dome (thumbs up for popcorn ceilings) and I was thinking about how rich people spend so much money to emulate something like it in real life, but anyone can have this amazing magical experience. And the response I got was that rich people don't want this version because this is for poor people and bored 40-something housewives. As if the mere association with bored 40 something housewives was enough to taint it and make it worthless. Because bored 40 something housewives are just useless eaters on the bottom rung and nobody cares about what they think is interesting. Like all the woo-woo stuff like crystals and tarot and astrology and pinterest grade occult stuff and spirituality will always be considered worthless because it's entertainment for bored 40 something housewives, the lowest of the low. And I am just a bored 40 something housewife trying to elevate herself with some woo-woo that nobody who matters cares about. Sort of a "you are a dog so you eat dog food because dog food is for dogs". Yow. :-( Thanks subconscious.

The part that really stung is the "bored" part. Wait, am I bored? I always thought being bored was for people with stunted imaginations. You know, "only boring people are bored". Am I bored?

It was an interesting (if mean) mental snapshot that kinda riled me up. Nobody wants to be a bored 40 something housewife, right? The mental picture is not good. But then, what is so wrong about it? Why is the existence of a bored middle aged woman something to sneer at? Don't most of us live unfulfilled in at least one area? We can't all be doctors or astronauts or congressmen, and I bet even some of them slack off and coast in different ways.

There's extra nuances I am losing here, but the gist was if you're indulging youself in open ended experiences because you have the wealth of spare resources to do that, at some point you need to do something concrete or you're just being a parasitic wanker wallowing in your excess. I guess it would be like the techbros going to burning man but disregarding the philosophy and treating it like an amusement park ride.

It wasn't a completely bad time, of course the visuals were beautiful. I hadn't ever looked at my cats when I was at the peak and they were so gorgeous, with the shifting knotwork patterns in their fur and their jewel like eyes. It really is something to experience. I think what I like most is knowing that it's my eyes and brain that are creating these illusions. All this beauty already exists like a well within me, and I can draw it out if I make the effort. If I understand the rules of natural beauty, I can make art that everyone will be drawn to, regardless of subject.

I will say, sushi is a bad food choice if your brain is in a suggestible state. I got a poke bowl as my dinner treat because at the time it sounded delicious, but eating pieces of raw flesh will put your mind on trains of thought that aren't conductive to a good time. I didn't know they would put octopus in the poke bowl, either. I wouldn't choose to eat octopus normally, and finding tentacles in your food when you are already seeing things is no bueno. It's been the one food choice I regret, so far.

If I wanted to go vegetarian or vegan, feeding myself raw meat while high would probably be a fantastic way to train the brain to be disgusted.

I kept adding to this entry and it hasn't come to a "finished" place yet, just keeps running on and on, but I'm going to post this chunk and keep chewing on the rest.