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SCP-4493 — Keep Pride Out Of Corps

by kinchtheknifeblade, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-4493. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.

Item #: SCP-4493

Object Class: Keter

Special Containment Procedures

Under no circumstances is the SCP Foundation, any of its subsidiary companies, or any individual employee thereof to profess pride in or support of an LGBT identity during the month of June.

Due to the nature of SCP-4493, full containment is difficult. SCP-4493-1 instances are unable to be deleted from the internet platform upon which they are posted. MTF Lambda-69 (“Riding Spinners”) are to be deployed to affected entities. Members of MTF L-69 are to focus upon providing “spin” to the information revealed in SCP-4493-1 instances but also obfuscation in times where the information may be anomalous in nature. SCP-4493-1 instances can be obfuscated with Protocol 0-Cool. SCP-4493-2 instances may be summarily destroyed.

Foundation moles are to be situated (where applicable) within corporations and police departments thought to be involved in unethical dealings with LGBT individuals or any other unethical practices. These moles are to attempt to discourage any show of support in LGBT identities during the month of June.

Description

SCP-4493 is a phenomenon that affects large organizations, especially corporations and political groups, that publicly profess solidarity with or support for LGBT individuals during the month of June. When affected organizations publish social media posts or advertisements that express support for the LGBT community, those media will be altered to highlight the negative impacts that the organization in question has had on LGBT individuals; SCP-4493 can also create new posts on social media sites. SCP-4493 appears to be transmitted between organizations that have notable economic or political ties; it can also be transmitted between organizations that send groups to march in the same LGBT Pride parade.

Social media posts altered or created by SCP-4493 are designated SCP-4493-1. SCP-4493-1 instances cannot be deleted from their original social media platform by usual means; this property extends to SCP-4493-1 re-posted to other social media pages (i.e. “retweets” on Twitter). As a result, containment of SCP-4493-1 instances requires cooperation with both the affected organization and the social media platform that contains the SCP-4493-1 instances.

Physical advertisements (such as billboards or pamphlets) affected by SCP-4493 are designated SCP-4493-2. SCP-4493-2 instances are altered instantaneously, changing between frames when the transformation is recorded. SCP-4493-2 instances are always created from previously existing media, rather than created spontaneously by SCP-4493; they maintain no anomalous properties after their transformation, and can be destroyed without incident.

Incident 4493-7

On 24 June 2019, a post by the Columbus Police Department’s Facebook became an instance of SCP-4493-1. It highlights numerous human rights abuses leveraged at LGBT individuals and others. Three police officers (Sgt. N. Krum, Officer B. Smith, and Officer L. Aaron) are highlighted to have used their positions to carry out numerous crimes on individuals within the city. The three police officers were later found dead in their respective homes. All are said to have died of heart attacks with no sign of foul play.

GOI-5869’s possible involvement is being investigated.

O5 Clearance Required

Due to SCP-4493 providing a Keter-level containment procedure and causing undue stress, the actions of GOI-5869 were considered a breach of current agreements and treaties with the Foundation. A meeting with O5-6 and POI-6870 was enacted in order to reach a resolution and/or hold them accountable.

The meeting took place on 14 June 2019.

O5-6: I’m O5-6. Here on behalf of O5 Command and the SCP Foundation.

Silence for three seconds.

POI-6870: <Coughs.> Oh, shit. Sorry. I’m Jude Kriyot. I’m here on behalf of myself.
O5-6: You expect me to believe that?
POI-6870: Listen, dude. This was all me. No one else in the chat had anything to do with this. I don’t think my actions should, you know, be used against the entirety of Gamers Against Weed. They’d’ve told me not to do this, if they heard about it.
O5-6: You admit creation of SCP-4493? The so-called “Pride Hacker?”
POI-6870: You know I don’t know those numbers.
O5-6: It’s for the recording.
POI-6870: Oh, okay. Cool. But yeah, I did it. And I don’t consider it a breach of our agreement.
O5-6: And how do you suppose that is?

POI-6870 leans back in his chair. He does not speak for twenty-two seconds.

POI-6870: As far as I remember, and my memory is surprisingly good, the agreement was that I keep all the kids in line. I keep everyone in my care from causing undue harm to the good people of this world. I make sure that the little dudes who can maybe cause you big trouble spend their energies on stupid, fun shit instead of making monsters and sex palaces in their basements, right?
O5-6: Certainly, that is part of the agreement, but—
POI-6870: I also don’t, what was it? I don’t pierce the veil. I don’t make magic that’s too visible to people in the normal world or whatever you wanna call it, right?
O5-6: Correct. And that’s the issue. Did you think you personally targeting Absolut Vodka wasn’t a breach of the agreement? I don’t think even you could stretch the strictures of our dealings that far, sir.
POI-6870 You know, that’s the funny thing. I didn’t target them.
O5-6: You didn’t?
POI-6870: That’s the fucked up part. I put the little bit of me in that shout about the new Mister Against Weed. I knew Wondertainment would be on that shit. It’s like the flu, you know. Companies that work together, it spreads through their business dealings and manifests when they do some rainbow capitalism.
O5-6: And of course, Wondertainment supplies to Marshall, Carter, and Dark?
POI-6870: Really, I expected this to stay in our sphere. I wouldn’t’ve made the posts fucking sticky as hell if I knew those guys were dealing with, like, normie companies, I wouldn’t’ve had it do that.
O5-6: It still would’ve been a breach of our agreement.
POI-6870: Nah, bud. I don’t consider a corporation a part of, the you know, public. If anything, I think I’m doing a service.
O5-6: The Foundation does not see it that way, unfortunately.
POI-6870: Well, I guess I understood our agreement a little differently, huh?

There is silence for fifteen seconds.

O5-6: Many of my colleagues wish for us to rescind our protection entirely, you know. They’re not happy about this.
POI-6870: I didn’t hurt anyone.
O5-6: Not directly.
POI-6870: <Spoken in a raised voice. Sound quality is momentarily distorted, as though by static electricity.> Not at all. Not even a little bit.

There is silence for eleven seconds.

O5-6: <Clears throat> This will not be considered a breach of the agreement, in light of the highlighted misunderstanding. The Foundation would like to note that any further involvement by Gamers Against Weed in the public sphere will be regarded as a breach and will render our protection null and void.
POI-6870: Bullshit.
O5-6: Do you not accept the terms?
POI-6870: <A sigh.> I accept. But, let me say one last thing.
O5-6: Yes?
POI-6870: If I were you guys, I wouldn’t celebrate Pride anytime soon.
O5-6: What makes you think our organization celebrates anything?
POI-6870: Please. Even the CIA tosses out a rainbow now that gay marriage is legal. Don’t knock my dick around.
O5-6: You’re certain we’re infected?
POI-6870: Oh, one hundred percent. By now, yeah. You’ve dabbled in this shit. It’s all over you.
O5-6: I don’t think my colleagues will be happy.
POI-6870: Fine with me, big dog. Am I free to go, or are you going to put me in a cell?
O5-6: No. You may leave. End recording.

Despite POI-6870’s general disrespect toward the Foundation and its motives throughout the meeting, POI-6870 was judged to be more useful uncontained, given the vast resources that would be necessary to contain him and the possible retaliation of GOI-5869.

Any further breach of agreement will be met with the full force of the Foundation.

Images

An instance of SCP-4493-1.

Image by kinchtheknifeblade

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