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30 [1] One who betroths a woman with money or a contract doesn't need to give the betrothing-object into her hand, rather, since she wants him to throw her the betrothing-object and he throws it, whether into her hand or into her lap or into her courtyard or into her field, she is betrothed. [2] If she was standing on property owned by the husband, he has to put the kiddushin (money or writ) into her hand or her lap.
Note: If the husband lent her an area in his courtyard, the law is the as with [handing over a writ of] divorce. Vide infra chapter 139 se'if 11). [3] If she was standing in property belonging to the two of them, and he tossed her the kiddushin [money or writ] with her knowledge, but it did not land in her hand or lap, she is married doubtfully. Even is she told him, "Set my kiddushin in this place," and that place belonged to both, this is a doubtful kiddushin (marriage). [4] If she was standing in an alley (meaning a path belonging to an individual) or in the sides of public property, and he threw them [the kiddushin] into her surrounding 4 cubits, she is married. But if they remained in his surrounding 4 cubits, she is not married. Even if she entered into those 4 cubits, because he preceded her there and already [re]acquired the [kiddushin] items and they belong to him. [5] If they were standing in a public domain or in a domain that did not belong to either of them, and he tossed her the kiddushin, if it is closer to him, she is not betrothed. If it was closer to her, she is betrothed. If equidistant, or there was doubt as to whether it was closer to him or closer to her, and the kiddushin money was then lost before it arrived in her hands, she is doubtfully betrothed. How do we define closer to him or closer to her? Items which he can guard and she cannot guard are deemed as closer to him. If she can guard them and he cannot, it is closer to her. If both can guard the items or neither can guard them, this is defined as half and half. [6] If he tossed the kiddushin money to her, even into her lap, but she did not pick it up, and remained silent, there is an authority who says that the action is negligible because she did not previously agree to become betrothed to him. [7] If he said to her: Be betrothed to me with this Dinar, and she picked it up and threw it into the sea before him, or into the air or any [place where it would be] lost, she is not betrothed. And it is not necessary to mention if she threw it before him to a place [where it would] not be lost, for this proves that she does not desire betrothal [with him]. And see below Siman 43 Saif 1. [8] If he said to her, be betrothed to me by a portion, and she said: Give it to my father, or to your father, or to so-and-so, and he gave it to them, even if he said to her: Be betrothed to me by the portion that I gave to them, she is not betrothed. But if she said: They they may accept it for me, she is betrothed, even if he did not respond and say: Be betrothed to me by the portion that I gave to them. [9] [If he said:] Be betrothed to my by a portion, and she said: Leave it on the rock, she is not betrothed. And if it was her rock, she is betrothed. And there are those who say [this applies] specifically if she identified the rock for him, as [is the case if] she said to him: Put it on such and such a rock or on my rock, but if she said simply: On the rock, and he put it on her [rock], she is not betrothed (Tur in the name of the Ramah). If the rock belonged to them both, behold she is doubtfully betrothed. Hagah: And the Rosh (Beit Yosef in his name) and the Tosafot (Tur in their name) explain that all this pertains if he after gave it into her lap in silence, even in this case if she first said: Put in on a rock, she is not betrothed, and on her rock etc. [10] [If he said:] Be betrothed to me by this loaf of bread, and she said to him: Give it to such and such a poor person, even if the poor person was next to her, she is not betrothed. And this also pertains [to the case in which] he afterwards put it in her lap (Tur). [11] [If he said:] Be betrothed to me by this loaf of bread, and she said to him: Give it to this dog, if it was her dog, behold she is betrothed. And if not, she is not betrothed. And if it was running after her to bite her, behold she is doubtfully betrothed. Hagah: And this also applies similarly if he afterwards put it in her lap (Tur in the name of the Tosafot). If she first said: Give the loaf of bread to the dog, or put a Dinar on the rock, and I will be betrothed to you, there are those who say the ruling is as if she said: Give a Dinar to so-and-so (Tur in the name of Yesh Omrim), and as was explained above Siman 29 Saif 2, and one should be stringent in the matter (Tur).
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