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Shulchan Arukh, Orach Chayim 606

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Shulchan Arukh

606 ‎[1] **“A man should appease his friend (i.e., a person whom he wronged) on the Eve of Yom Kippur” - Containing four paragraphs.**

Yom Kippur does not atone for sins between a man and his comrad (fellow-man) until he conciliates him. Even if he angered him only in words, he is required to appease him (his fellow-man). And if at first he is not pacified, he (must) return and go to him a second and third time. Each time he should take three men with him, and if on the third time he does not become reconciled he (no longer) is obligated to him, (nevertheless afterwards he should say before ten (people) that he did request forgiveness from him), (מרדכי דיומא ומהרי״ל). If he (i.e., the person who was wronged) was his teacher, he must go to him many times until he becomes appeased.

Hagah*: The person to forgive should not be cruel by refusing forgiveness (to the one seeking forgiveness), (מהרי״ל), unless his intent is for the good of the one requesting forgiveness, (גמרא דיומא). But if one caused him (the wronged person) a bad name, there is no necessity in forgiving him, (מרדכי וסמ״ק והגה״מ פ״ב מהלכות תשובה ומהרי״ו). ‎[2] If a man against whom he sinned died, (the man who sinned) brings ten people and let them stand on his (the dead man’s) grave and he (the sinner) says, “I have sinned against the God of Israel, and against this “person” who I sinned against him,” (and it was customary to seek forgiveness on the Eve of Yom Kippur), (מרדכי דיומא). ‎[3] Early rabbinic authorities decreed, coupled with “חרם”, ban, that the living should not slander the dead. ‎[4] One may immerse (inaritual bath) and accept lashes (to effect atonement) whenever desired provided that it is before nightfall, but one does not bless over the immersion.
Hagah*: One needs to immerse one time without a confession because of pollution (urinary emmission). The same holds true if one pours nine kavs of water (upon himself), (if the immersion pains him, (מגן אברהם),), this is also effective, (מהרי״ו וכל בו ותשב״צ). One who incurs a death between Rosh HaShanah and Yom Kippur, it is permissible to wash and to immerse on the Eve of Yom Kippur because Yom Kippur cancels the “*shiva*”, (the seven day mourning period), (מהרי״ל, הלכות שמחות). Even though it is customary not to wash (bath) during the entire “sheloshim”, (thirty day mourning period), a commanded immersion is permitted, (דעת עצמו).

Version Info

Version: Hilkhot Yom ha-Kippurim, trans. by Jan M. Brahms. HUC, 1976

Source: http://library.huc.edu/pdf/theses/Brahms_Jan_M-CN-Rab-1976_rdf.pdf

License: CC-BY

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