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2012-02-09 18:52:51
> It changes a lot when you're over 30. Women realize there's no such thing as Prince Charming and it's time to settle for someone who treats them well and isn't going to leave.
Unfortunate what also happens is that those men become bitter. When you get spurned for so long you become used to being on your own, and you also see 'women settling' for what it really is.
This.
I last had a date in the 90s. I was lonely for the first year or two after, bitter for the next four or five years, and finally got over it.
Now that I'm in my 40s, I've actually been asked out on a date once or twice, and I've turned them down. There's no bitterness; it's simply no longer something I want to do. I've got a reasonably-fulfilling career in tech; I get up, play with computers for a few hours, come home, and flip a coin deciding whether to (a) cook something (and crack open a bottle of something) nice and spend the rest of the evening evening vegging out reading Slashdot, Reddit, and Fark, (b) tinker on programming and/or modding projects, or (c) play Skyrim. Sex? If the urge for sex strikes, there's an entire Internet full of pr0n out there, and then I can get back to whatever it was I was doing. I'm content in my lifestyle, and when every waking hour is filled spending something I do want to do, and I realized that when push comes to shove, there's simply no room in my life for a relationship.
In the same way as the woman who settled for a good guy who'd be content to take care of her and help her raise the family, men can "settle" too. Sour grapes? Sure, there's a little bit of that. But on a risk-reward basis, I'm grateful that the human palate adjusts.