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     ."             ..      .

holy shit I've just awoken from possibly the most beautiful dream I have ever had, wherein I got freaking HRT! it was actually blissful. no clue whether girljuice actually does that to you in real life, especially not after only two days (which I remember explicitly pointing out in the dream) but hooooly mackarel; of course the dream was more about the idea that it had finally happened than the effects themselves.

it took place in a very familiar location, possibly in the early morning, though I dont't really feel like this was of any particular relevance. I simply jolted down the street, in the most light hearted mood I think I've ever been in, and was quite simply happy to enjoy existence, all while thinking of all the fun effects HRT would have on me.

dreams are funny innit. sometimes they fuck you over the whole day, others... well maybe they also fuck you over because real life sucks in comparison, but what can you do.

the way the dream felt can't really be put to words, because that's dreams for ya, but I can say that that dream's emotional content was nigh on par with The Garden.

so uhh, in the dream I remember saying something along these lines: "I'm finally [word that describes hypothetical (legal?) status in which one no longer needs prescriptions to get drugs]! I can get anything, [unrememberable example 1], [unrememberable example 2], you name it!". I also remember being pretty explicitly aware that I was on T-blockers specifically. and honestly I was in actual bliss. my body didn't feel any different at all in the dream than it normally would otherwise. regardless, it was an incredible experience. it dragged on for quite a while after waking up too, still super excited that OMGOMG I AM FINALLY ON HRT HOLY FUCKING SHIT. I'm pretty sure I looked around the room, disarming my alarm clock and everything, completely awake and still utterly convinced that the dream was real; until my rational brain kicked in and went "wait a second that makes no fucking sense!" that stung by golly. that stung A LOT. stung is the word, it popped into my head that very moment.

I would rather be stung by a vespa velutina than go through that realization again again.

PS: despite the initial sting, a vague feeling of excitement and general well being hovered over me throughout the rest of the day. thanks dream!