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Computerhead Sam

Computerhead Sam

Sits on the bus all alone

Nobody shares the bench

Cause his damn head so big

On the screen

It says everything heā€™s thinking

And people feel invasive

When they look him in the face

So they try not to look

And what theyā€™re not looking at

Is him saying

Why wonā€™t they look at me

Why wonā€™t they sit by me

Oh woe is me Iā€™m so lonely

At the end of the day

He plugs in at the outlet

And he wishes he hadnā€™t done it

At the time it seemed awesome

He thought it just a matter of time

Before everybody swapped their heads

For big computer monitors

But the company that did the procedure

Went under within the year

Itā€™s just Computerhead Sam

And a handful of other guys

Spread out over the country

He canā€™t fly on a plane

To be around someone similar

Because TSA didnā€™t make rules for that

They just get confused

And turn him around

So he rides the bus all over

Looking for somewhere to work

But people are put off

By the aforementioned computerhead

Best he can hope for

Is a remote office job

When he does his interviews

He tries to have a sense of humor

He says you can save on expenses

I already got the computer

And they hardly ever laugh

They ask technical questions

About what operating systems

Heā€™s able to run in his head

Then they look at him

And spelled out on the screen

Is something unpleasant

And they tell him

Thanks but no thanks

Better luck next time

What a damn shame

He got rid of his old head

It wasnā€™t all that bad

He had a nice smile

But thereā€™s no number to call

To get the head back

Who knows what they did with it

That poor poor guy

Computerhead Sam

i canā€™t die

I canā€™t die

Or i wouldnā€™t be i

I would be

Something else

The I in I

Stands for

I canā€™t die

Some people

Are scared of dying

Some people

Are scared of living

I not scared of anything

Because I canā€™t die

I is alive

So if i were dead

That just wouldnā€™t be i

Thatā€™s something but

Itā€™s not I

I is forever

I stands for infinity

I is so big

That they had to use one letter

Otherwise

Weā€™d be here all day

Explaining about I

How I canā€™t die

Because I is I

So when i get hurt and injured

I donā€™t get afraid

No matter what happens

I canā€™t die

I donā€™t know why

But I cant die

all the way

A woman sits in a chair

She is somewhere

A room probably

Sheā€™s folded her hands

Under her legs

Because they have turned bright red

They do this any time

She starts feeling anxious

And from outside the room

Somehow you know it happened

Miles away youā€™ve got headphones in

And Paul Simon is singing her name

When those arenā€™t even the words

Thatā€™s the tough part

Of loving all the way

A heart is a one way road

It only goes in

So it wonā€™t cross your mind

Until it strikes right through it

Youā€™ve got a good memory

Not photographic

But if they made a camera

That just captured emotion

Thatā€™s what youā€™d have

Filling up your photo album

The smell of the air tonight

Pulls you back to years ago

With some person you almost forgot

Until now youā€™re back next to them

The weight of them on your arm

The sound of them in your ear

And the feeling in your heart

That somebody wants you tonight

Itā€™s not a bad thing not at all

It just comes in waves

Everyone you ever loved

Churning up the tide

By the time you get old

Itā€™ll probably never stop

One big love tidal wave

To take you all the way

To the far shore

super saiyans are real

Um whatā€™s up YouTube

This is something thatā€™s been

on my heart for a long time

And you know

All i ever wanted to be in life

Was a super saiyan

You know ever since i was a little kid

I used to always look up to goku

and vegeta

Gohan

I used to just look at them and

Just wonder like

How come Iā€™m just a human being

You know

Iā€™m so worthless

Oh what can i do?

I can run

I can jump

I can flip

And itā€™s just like

We are so limited as human beings

And i just feel like

When i see superheroā€™s

You know

Why canā€™t we be

That exciting

And that

Awesome

Like why canā€™t i wake up

And if Iā€™m late for school

Just teleport there

And be on time?

But i feel like

You know

During that time of meditation

And just thinking about it

I realized something:

All of that is possible and more

Itā€™s all in here

Itā€™s all in your mind

Think about anything

That you ever tried to do

You thought to yourself

Man, i could never do that

But then when you practiced it

Guess what?

You got better at it

And you actually achieved it

Didnā€™t you?

Itā€™s the same thing

When you look at

Super powers

Of course it sounds absurd

When you first look at it

But if you try it

You know if you actually

Set your mind to it

And believe

You can achieve it

ā€¦

I saw a Chinese man

Set a piece of paper on fire

With just the power of his hands

Now youā€™re gonna tell me

That that was fake?

No it wasnā€™t fake!

He channeled that energy

From within

And he believed

And he channeled that energy

Through the creation of his mind

Of what his mind believed

And what he spoke into existence

Of the power that he had

You understand what Iā€™m saying

I feel like anything that

You set your mind to

Your mind can create that force

Because your mind

Is just this powerful machine

Whatever you set it to

And you believe

And you work towards achieving it

You can do it

You can do it

And i believe i can be a super saiyan

https://youtu.be/C46kW_1rIO4?si=9ZkmiJ11Dbprkhfr

the house

I was cooking

Beans and rice

Always beans and rice

And i decided to burn the house down

I left the stovetop on

I put every blanket in the house

In a pile on the floor

Then i lit every candle

And i put the space heater

Full blast in the living room

I left your curling iron on

Then i started smoking inside

By the time you got home

The fire was going strong

You saw me in there

Burning and smiling

And i waved at you

I hollered donā€™t worry

I took out an insurance claim

You said that doesnā€™t work for arson

So i frowned and tried to put it out

You helped me stamp out the ashes

Then you drove me to hospital

After all my skin grew back

You told me you were leaving me

I felt like that was unfair

I said could you wait a week

And think it over

You said you already did

You were planning on leaving

Long before I burned down the house

I really thought my scam would work

All our problems would burn up

And weā€™d be left rich and homeless

But i guess youā€™re right

I shouldnā€™t burn down the house

Even if i meant well

alien invasion

In 1988 a lichen was discovered

Growing on the outside

Of the Russian space station Mir

Somehow thriving in the void

A lichen is a symbiotic lifeform

It is a plant and a fungus

One creature from two organisms

The plant takes in light

The fungi gathers nutrients

And they feed each other

Humans die easily

But we can build things

Like a rocket into space

Like the worlds biggest gun

Point it at a planet

Board the crew

A ship full of lichen

And begin the invasion

Conquer the stars

In the name of Earth-Life

And on this home planet

Full of childless uncles

We know at least we made a mark

There is something like us

Which will survive

On this rock

And the rest of the empire

Even if we die out

Before we learn

How the lichen does it

psychosphere

There has been a disturbance

Rippling through the fabric

Of the psychosphere

If youā€™re trained you can tell

When you go to sleep

Your brain rides the waves

They always come in sets of three

Waking dreams and dreaming awakes

Reading a dream is hard because

Youā€™re used to reading words

Specific messages

But dream mood messages

Donā€™t have thought out morals

They are echoes in the wake

Of a big fat feeling

That one of your six senses

Picked up out in the world

I dreamed again of teeth falling out

Twelve teeth in my hand

Gums bleeding full of holes

And i just started a new job

Teaching at a school

But i couldnā€™t talk

Because i had no teeth

I stole a ticket

Hopped a train

Cooked a big meal

All with teeth in my hand

And this is either about me

Or i caught a wave

From somebody elseā€™s mind

In th psychosphere ocean

ghosts

When you are alive

You are inside your body

But you are other places too

You are in photographs

You are in memories

In footprints in the sand

In the rut you left in the couch

Youā€™re burned into the hard drive

Youā€™re in other peopleā€™s dreams

Youā€™re all over the place

When you die

From getting runned over

By a big sixteen wheeler

Your pancaked body falls hollow

You arenā€™t in it anymore

You become untethered

All the strands of you in the world

They persist

Some just fade away

Like your body decaying

But in all of the places

The connection was strongest

You become a ghost

A partial image

Visible only to some

You show up in dreams

You show up in memories

You show up in pictures on the wall

And only after all of them fade

A long long long time

Thatā€™s when youā€™re laid to rest

Thatā€™s when you stop

tom jerry

Tale as old as time

A cat chasing a mouse

Expand on this

A dog to chase the cat

A flea to be chased by the mouse

A germ to be chased by the flea

A man to chase the dog

A bigger man to chase the man

Comedic hijinks ensue

Slapstick comedy

Tom and Jerry

good Sunday njght

Played at the open mic tonight at my favorite bar and it went very well. The bartender kept hyping me up and bought me several drinks after. I got a free drink every night this weekend. My brother and sister in law were in town for some stuff and stayed with me. And every night the bartenders were like, ā€œhey do you want this free shot, i made it just for youā€ (sometimes this was plural, sometimes just for me). It was a good time. Iā€™ve been feeling. Wintery. Which is what i expected winter in a new city would be like. But the last week or so i have broken through and genuinely enjoyed myself most days of the week. And that is a massive win. I am so proud of myself and still, even now in a sort of lull, so glad that i made the decision to move. I am pushing myself all the time, and all the time i am moving towards where i want to be. Multiple people at the bar tonight told me i killed it and were so nice, and i got to talk to some new people who Iā€™ll probably see again at the next open mic night. The opportunity cost of not being around my bestest friends all the time still weighs on me, but i feel certain at this point that there is no way that i could have avoided making this move without seriously stagnating my own growth. I am so grateful that everyone has taken time to come up and visit, and i hope that this is a debt that i can repay in time. I got to go to bed now, but Iā€™m working from home tomorrow because i am smart. I hope you are well as you read this, and are being patient and kind to yourself. Thatā€™s the biggest thing that matters. And get some sleep. Like me right now: Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

pirate

First i gotta learn to sail

I already know how to steal

How to be rough and ragged

I taught myself to cuss

I wasnā€™t good at first

But now i cuss all the time

Shit dammit fuck

I already made my pirate flag

Itā€™s so good Iā€™ll show you it

PirateFlag.jpeg

If you want to join my crew

You gotta make a pirate name

Like

Salty Briner

Pudd

No-Beard

The Mollusk

Petey

Two-Beard

Oldman

Siren-bait

Chum

Sunscreen

Landlubber

Pickle

Three-Beard

Flapjack from Cartoon Network

Seadog

Foggy

Captain Jack Sparrow

Blue

Wharf

Young Shelldon

Krill Jones

Squidbelly

Doc

Skipper

Flipper

Dipper

Ripper

Nine-Beard

The Face

Mad Dog

Sea Legs

Sea Arms

Sea Hips

Barnacle Bill

Cannonface

The Fly

Sharkfoot

Tsunami Sue

Eel boy

Lobster Legs

Sushi

Guppy

Scaly Jim

Stinky

Low Tide Larry

Scumsucker

Fishkisser

Uncle

Stormtemper Sal

Fifteen-Beard

Waterlungs

Harpoon Joe

Sunburn Sam

Pirate [Your Name]

Gull

Hermann the Merman

Mister Pibb

Dinghy Dan

Plank

Or something like that

Then we set sail for the high seas

Weā€™re gonna get us some treasure

Weā€™re gonna bury it on an island

Weā€™re gonna draw maps

And mark the treasure with an X

Weā€™re gonna send messages in bottles

Chop stuff up with swords

Face down the mighty Kraken

Get awful lonesome out on the seas

Hold each other as we sing our shanties

Drink Grog

Find out what grog is

And drink it

And we wonā€™t get scurvy

Because i packed oranges

Vitamin D

I think that prevents scurvy

If not

Well then thatā€™s a learning experience

The world needs pirates

And i think these be them

thaw

Itā€™s back above freezing

Tepid thirty five

So the snow should be melting

And it is except the big pile

On the edge of every parking lot

Itā€™s been snow so long

It forgot how to be water

Thatā€™s why itā€™s so foggy lately

It forgot water goes on the ground

So itā€™s flying around pretending

Hoping nobody notices

It forgot what water does

train home at 6 pm

I left my damn book at my desk

So no reading tonight

I had fun with my coworkers

Drank three free beers

Reconsidered my planned exit

If only for a brief moment

There is good in all people

And i know this

Itā€™s one of my favorite things

Everyone is easy to love

If you look at them for long enough

But i want to be doing something else

So Iā€™ll still quit when itā€™s time

Im feeling bad because

I think Iā€™m gonna break the general strike

I forgot to buy toilet paper

And i am fully out

I canā€™t even tell if people are participating

But i wanted to do something

I wish that i did more

All the time i worry about the world

But i donā€™t spend much time

Trying to help

Gonna start volunteering locally

Maybe join some kind of organization

I wish it paid to be good and kind

Instead it just pays to make money

And if you want to be good and kind

You gotta find a loophole

Where it makes money too

Or do it someplace else

Iā€™m riding the same train now

Same car same seat

That i was on yesterday home from work

I know because the graffiti

I donā€™t think thatā€™s happened before

Not so close together

Thereā€™s something to that

I wish i had my book

I wanted to read more

By this weekend

My brothers coming to visit

And he already read it

Heā€™s good at reading

Came to it later in life

Now heā€™s a big time reader

I look up to him

Just as much as i look over

Counting all our differences

Value neutral

I gotta do it my way

Thatā€™s the thing Iā€™ve found

If Iā€™m gonna do it

I gotta do it my way

Well hereā€™s my stop

Check back in later

Much love

From me to you

Xoxo

fogging

Slept in today

Said Iā€™d get a drink after work

So i didnā€™t get in early

I got on the 6:30 train

Instead of the 6:00 train

And i read my book

Which Iā€™ve been meaning to do

I get to the end of my chapter

And slam it shut

Pretty girl across the train

Looks over and smiles

Then she does it again

Maybe ten times she does this

And i curl my finger around

The canvas strap of my bag

And i sheepishly return the smile

She just keeps on looking

I ought to make something of it

But this has never happened to me

So i look away

And when we get off at the same stop

We walk in silence

The same direction

Until we split

Disappearing after a few seconds

Into the thick morning fog

I stare wistfully into the lights shining

Through the translucent air

And i wonder what i shouldā€™ve done

goose

The goose steps into the melting snow

Leaving a perfect goosefoot imprint

Like me it is feathered and beaked

And like me it remembers summer

The other side of the shining sun

Feet cooling off in the water

When everything is yellow or blue

It can feel almost permanent

Like the air never cooled

Like the snow never melted

Just here waiting for us to catch up

Me and the other geese

Every year on December 1st

This planet is in the same place

Relative to our motherstar Sol

December 1st sits still in that spot

Year after year as we pass through it

And in the summer as June starts

You can feel it out there looming

Across the other side of the sun

Like grief in the back of your mind

It is always always there

In the warmth there is cold

In the dark there is light

Fly north fly south

The snow is melting

And if you step on it with bare feet

You can leave a mark there

A perfect goosefoot impression

Waiting for you

Til you come around again

coin is always right

Said Iā€™d go play

At the open mic tonight

Then i ate and got lazy

Didnā€™t want to go this week

So what do i do

I flip a coin

A coin has two sides

One side means one thing

The other means the other

Take this out of my hands

Up into the air

Slap down onto my wrist

And thereā€™s the outcome

The only way

It could have ever been

The coin is always right

Iā€™ll go play next week

doggy

I see a dog

I say doggy

I say hi doggy

I smile at doggy

I pet doggy

I kiss doggy on the head

I say good doggy

I say you be good ok doggy

And then i go away

Itā€™s really so easy actually

You could do this

To any dog

dungeon

My ex wife runs a dungeon

Well she doesnā€™t operate it

She just owns it

Lives upstairs and charges rent

While the dungeon keeper

Keeps to the dungeon

I went over there one time

It was dank and dark and smelly

I complimented her on it

As those are positive traits

For a dungeon to have

She told me thereā€™s a cell

Tucked away in the corner

I can use any time i like

I said thanks but no thanks

Iā€™ve had enough torture

For now at least

But she gave me a key anyway

So i poked my head in the cell

Smelled like bleach and fungus

Thereā€™s something scratched

Into the wet stone wall

It is a frowning face

She pointed at it and said

Thatā€™s you Ha Ha

I looked at her

Realized i was frowning

And tried to stop

I told her shut up already

And i left the dungeon

I still pass by every so often

Not on purpose itā€™s just

Between me and where Iā€™m going

And i hear the moaning and screaming

From all the tortured souls

Squeezing through the iron bars

Try not to but I glance upstairs

And there she is again

Brushing her hair in the window

Cackling over a cauldron

Itā€™s hard for me to tell really

Iā€™m certainly not unbiased

But i think maybe sheā€™s evil

i count pluto

When Iā€™m leaving the house

Going out of town

I always stop at the door

And turn around

I scan my eyes across the room

I wonā€™t be back for a few days

I donā€™t want to leave anything behind

When weā€™re all walking in a group

Sometimes you get quiet

You fall back and slow down

And i leave you be

Youā€™ll come back when youā€™re ready

But i keep turning around

To make sure youā€™re still there

And you donā€™t get left behind

When they tell me to count the planets

I count all nine

I count Mercury Venus Earth

Mars Jupiter Saturn

Uranus Neptune Pluto

They tell me thatā€™s not right

But i always count Pluto

I donā€™t want to leave it behind

chud

Cannibalistic

Humanoid

Underground

Dwellers

Contamination

Hazard

Urban

Disposal

Crying

Hurting

Until

Death

Cringe

Happens

Under

Duress

Chill

Handsome

Upbeat

Dudes

Cheese

Ham

Ultimate

Dinner

Chaos

Harvest

Useless

Device

Calm

Heart

Ugly

Duckling

your moneys no good here

At the end of the world

You donā€™t have to go to work

You can sit and watch the snow fall

For hours if you want to

And it will be gray

And it will be cold

But you donā€™t have to go to work

space show

Iā€™ve been watching lots of tv

Because i like the sound of voices

And i only have the one myself

So i turn on the tv

Lately itā€™s been all sci fi space stuff

I always used to dream of that

Flying off into space

Still do but

I got baggage now

So Iā€™m sitting watching all these shows

Even at their most pessimistic

They are so full of hope

Visions of a future where we won

Against ourselves and all odds

We flew off into the stars

And we were cowboys and scientists

Knights and adventurers

Heroes and monsters and pirates

It just takes a little imagination

To see that everything is possible

Itā€™s so beautiful and human

I think if you wanna be in charge

Of anything

You should have to write a story

About people in a spaceship

Centuries in the future

How they live and how they feel about it

I think that would help some

Wouldnā€™t fix none but

Letā€™s you know who youā€™re dealing with

Me personally?

My story is about hot babes in space

Girl babes, guy babes

Any kind of babe really

Hot people floating around

And theyā€™re trying to solve a problem

Using their hot bodies and sharp minds

And when they arenā€™t working

Theyā€™re kissing each other

Talking about the future

The kind of world they wanna make

Theyā€™re telling stories

About space babes in space

Trying to build a better world

And so on and so on

Because the work is never done

We can always do better

We can always kiss more

We can always go further out in space

To learn something

About the universe

And about ourselves

Failing that

We can build cool lasers and robots

And we can die in crazy ways

So far from home

martyr

The sound of success

Echoes in an empty stomach

Clove-hitched around this post

Just across that line in the sand

Winning feels like keeling over

Spitting blood from cracked lips

Weakly tracing a name in the dust

The name of the sole victor

The one with a reason to die

ziggy

Ziggy fix the heat

I been calling you all day

Itā€™s cold in here

So cold i finally noticed

Ziggy come on fix the heat

Big red nose straight into the glass

Laugh it off then

Run run run to the bathroom

Ziggy come on man

Iā€™m expecting company

I donā€™t care if Iā€™m cold

Iā€™m good like that

But i gotta turn the heat on

Ziggy please would you

Fix the got damn heat

I finally got the soft lighting

Just how i want it inside

But nobodyā€™s gonna want to hang

If itā€™s cold like it is now

So Ziggy if you could

I know youā€™re tired

And you just went to doctor

But i need to use the heat

And youā€™re the only guy i know

Who can fix the heat

The pilot went out

Ziggy tells me

Then he replaces a bunch of stuff

Tells me how to fix it next time

Then heā€™s on his way

And my place is warm

Thanks Zig

this is real

I have to make something

Right now

Or i think Iā€™m gonna die

Iā€™ll draw a song

Or write a picture

But i gotta get this out of me

And into the world

I think i might be sick

But Iā€™ve long decided

Being sick is no reason

Not to go on living

So i gotta cope

Whatever works

Make something right now

Then i can hold it

In my hands

Next time i have this feeling

And i can say

This is real

This is something in the world

It exists and itā€™s real

And i made it

broadsword

Iā€™m doing that thing again

The thing i hate to do

One of many i suppose

I got my dukes up

Rolling like a welterweight boxer

But nobodyā€™s swinging

No punches are landing

But Iā€™m all bruised up

Every morning when i come back

From the black behind my eyes

I donā€™t know how to do it

How to put this weapon down

I really feel like Iā€™m gonna need it

But i learned this in oblivion

People will like you more

If you put away your weapon

Before talking to them

I got a two handed broadsword

I donā€™t polish it because

I donā€™t think Iā€™d like reflecting

On the hands holding the sword

Iā€™ve never really swung it

Not at anything real

But Iā€™m holding it like i might

Like any second i might swing

And i never do

I donā€™t even want to

Iā€™m not a knight or a soldier

I canā€™t fight

I wonā€™t hurt anything

I canā€™t even protect myself

So what is the sword for

Besides looking cool

And growing rusty

happy old year

It is snowing

On the last day of the year

I went to the park

To smile at a big dog

Running around

On the smooth white earth

Nothing touching my body

Has ever touched yours

And that makes me feel safe

Iā€™m new now

Like the new year

Covered in white

Waiting for some footsteps

To reveal all the old

Just a half an inch down

I always used to get bitter

At midnight on new years

Cynical and pessimistic

But Iā€™m new now

Iā€™m hopeful optimistic

So much so that

When the clock counts down

Iā€™m not going into the new year yet

Iā€™m going back to all the old ones

To fix what i messed up

To smile when i shouldā€™ve

To appreciate this little moment

Standing around counting

With people i know

Before we all step outside

Put our first foot down

Into the fresh white year

Happy new year

Happy old year

All of them

Happy this time

ultron

The robots are using all the water

They leave the faucet running

Because nobody programmed them

To care about the water bill

They walk around all day

Wasting energy counting to infinity

Because nobody told them

You really only need about 1,000,000,000,000 numbers

Anything above that is too big

To really be useful in any way

They plug themselves in the outlet

And the lights flicker

But they just donā€™t care

Nobody programmed them to care

They drive their cars so fast

Then they drive in circles

Around the parking lot all day long

Looking for the closest spot

Because thatā€™s what they were told to do

They never look up at the sky

Never count the stars and constellations

Nobody thought they needed to

But now the world is full of them

And they donā€™t care about the stars

They just perform their function

Over and over and over

Even when itā€™s done

Nobody told them to stop

Nobody taught them there could be enough

They generate one billion images

Of a yellow dog in a green field

Filling up the internet with noise

But they do not walk the dog

Do not pass through the field

Because thatā€™s not what they were made for

They were made to replace people

But we forgot all the good parts

Now the world is full of robots

And they donā€™t even see the problem

They walk around it because

They were programmed not to see it

So i built a robot to love

I built a robot to care

I soldered and welded

Hammered and nailed

I kissed him on the metal forehead

I held his hand and walked him

Down the stairs into the world

And he opened his eyes

And screamed

giant beast

Well

I really biffed this one up

I created a giant beast

Full of hunger

Insatiable hunger

It ravages the land

It eats plants and animals

People and rocks

Anything and everything

It is angry and starving

And it is so so big

I was trying to make a nice beast

Who would walk the land

Giving hugs and kisses

But i got something wrong

And the beast is on the loose

It ate my whole house

It ate my mom and dad

It ate your new car

I canā€™t kill it

I made it unkillable

Iā€™m really sorry about this

My giant evil beast

Please donā€™t be mad

Please donā€™t be mad

Please donā€™t be mad

heart

I am so full of love

That everything is easy

Bubump bubump bubump

premonition

I dreamt of corn bread

The kind with corn in it

And then there it was

In front of me

I dreamt of myself in the mirror

And there i was

In front of me

These visions

They must mean something

I think itā€™s happening

My mind is finally expanding

Overflowing from my skull

I have psychic abilities

I will be putting them to good use

By destroying things

Starting small fires

Sending cryptic messages

Forecasting the weather

I will hone my skills

Until i am a creature of the mind

I exist outside my body

In electric impulse in the air

maggot

Always the maggot

Never the fly

I hate to break it to you

But this is going to change you

You canā€™t go back

To squirming in the dirt

Once youā€™re up in the air

And youā€™re scared of heights

So you stay safe here

Unchanging in the dark

Shadow of a medium stone

But when the earth freezes

Youā€™re gonna get cold and lonely

Youā€™re gonna wish you had flown

Feasted on garbage in the garage

Youā€™ll squirm back and forth

Carving a ditch for yourself to die in

And when all is said and done

You changed anyways

More painful and strange

Than if youā€™d just let it happen

Your vestigial wings

Beat frantically under your skin

But you canā€™t leave the ground

Youā€™re stuck here now

Maggot

pbs eons

Fire, like a dog

Is a form of life

A chemical reaction

Found only on one planet

An exchange of energy and matter

The atmosphere it breathes

Is made possible by plantlife

The fuel it needs to burn

Is organic tissue, live or dead

We could not be here without fire

And fire likewise without us

We are the same

Related to each other

Do not fear the flaming forest

A burning world is not a dead one

It is a world full of life

cowboy

The last man on earth is a cowboy

She sits in a cave kicking embers

Rolling up what just might be

The last cigarette ever

The night wind blows strong

So she stands at the cave mouth

Lights the smoke with a burning stick

The dogs are hunting close tonight

But they donā€™t come near

They donā€™t like the smell of smoke

Thereā€™s no people left out there

Used to be a few

Before that a lot

But they all came and went

So now the cowboy stands alone

Smoking in the middle of the night

There was time for mourning

Then there was more time

Time for kicking dust up

Rummaging through the world

Polishing a pistol

Humming a little tune

The cowboy spits on the ground

She knows shes dying

And with her something greater dies

But that isnā€™t what she thinks of

When she breathes in deep

And glances at the smudged moon

Glowing in the smoky sky

She thinks about tomorrow

Walking along the river

Eating dried rabbit meat

Drinking from her canteen

Watching the world pass by

She thinks about living

Making it another day

Because thatā€™s what cowboys do

They just go on living

Free and wild and lonesome

Cowboy style

scar

I have a scar above my right eye

I got from running headfirst

Into the steel skull

Of my little puppy dog

Running headfirst at me

I have a scar between my nostrils

Where it ripped it half

I got it from running headfirst

Into the arms of my father

When he wasnā€™t looking

Sliding between his legs

And hitting my head on my crib

I have a scar on my left ear

Where the inner and outer radii connect

I got from running headfirst

Slipping and falling at the zoo

Slicing my ear on a sharp metal chair

I have a scar above my knee

I got it in gym class in 7th grade

Running headfirst to make

A diving catch

And i made the catch

Nurse told me to put a bandaid on it

Then i went to the ER and got 7 stitches

I havenā€™t gotten any more recently

But i figure if i do

Iā€™ll probably get it

Running headfirst into something

But i donā€™t think Iā€™ll stop running

Itā€™s too much fun

room

Thereā€™s an elephant in the room

But the door is too small

The elephant doesnā€™t ele-fit

So we canā€™t get him out

Even by addressing him directly

Seems to me the room was built

After the elephant was already here

Somebody kept him fed and happy

While they built all the walls

Painted all the crown molding

Stained the hardwood floor

Brought in all the furniture

And in we stumbled

Not even noticing him there

He must be a shy elephant

He just waited in the corner

For one of us to spot him

Even now heā€™s sheepish

As we all try to shove him

Out through the doorway

The landlord says his hands are tied

Elephant pays his rent on time

Month after month after month

So we make peace with it

We clasp our hands together

Form a circle around the elephant

And bring it in for a hug

We love and accept you elephant

Just the way you are

Standing in the middle of the living room

drain

A guy came out of my drain

He was wet and covered

With hair and mucus

He said

Oops wrong drain

And he went back down

So i turned off the faucet

And put my eye to the hole

It was dark so i backed up

Got my phone flashlight

Put it up to the hole

From what i could tell

Thereā€™s a guy who lives in the drains

A secret tenant in the building

I guess he slithers around

While weā€™re showering

Washing our hands

Pissing and shitting

Itā€™s all the same pipe at some point

So Iā€™m guessing he lives there

All coiled up down in the drain

I guess thatā€™s why sometimes

The tub fills up with water

Heā€™s blocking the way

I whisper into the drain

What are you doing here

I see an eye float up

He says heā€™s just cleaning

Says he donā€™t live here

Heā€™s just passing through

Clearing out the drains

But weā€™ve got bad drains

So heā€™s probably gonna

Need to stay for a few months

I donā€™t buy his story

But i wonā€™t press him

He seemed sad in a way

A way i guess youā€™d only get

If youā€™re living in the drains

I hope heā€™s okay down there

I tell him if you need anything

Just give me a holler

Weā€™re in this world together

Me and you Drain-guy

He said heā€™s not called that

His name is Todd actually

Okay i say

Well i need to shower

So can you go

And he says yup

And with a loud slurp

Heā€™s gone

undestroyer iii

There are two ways to do it

Take this world into yourself

With your mouth

The tongue the teeth

The acid of the stomach

You reach out into the world

And bite into it

Chew it up and swallow

And all the little pieces

Become part of your body

You are what you eat

You are the animal you kill

You are the grass it was fed on

You are the burning light of the sun

Eat your son and become him

Eat well and live long

Eat poison and die

Some small thing will eat you

Will become you so

You never really die

Just spread out all over

Eating and being eaten

With your eyes

Wide and blinking

At the flashing lights

A series of still images

Smashed together

Take it in reflected

On the inverted mirror

The back wall of your eye

Flip it in your mind

Learn something from this

Create your sense of self

Out of fragments of light

You have seen before

Which shine in empty skull

Flood out the darkness

Which only seems to grow

As the universe expands

So does every void

What you see you believe

And if nothing else

Faith creates the world

A world with a hole in it

A black space in time

The shape of the hole is You

Youā€™re the absence of creation

With your eyes and teeth

Opening and closing

Closing and opening

You can destroy the world

You can build a new one

You can destroy your self

You can build a new one

Heaven and hell as real

As they are in your head

Angels and monsters

As large as you can get

Before you die and divide

Wings and claws and horns

Head of eyes and teeth

Spinning around the

Black hole orbiting

Anything that is

Consumed

Anything that will be

Consumed

Into the mouth or the mind

Of something greater

The wolf of time

The spider of space

Twinkling in your eye

Melting in your mouth

scrip

Great news everyone

The 50 hours Iā€™ve been working

Every other week

Have finally paid off

My boss said ā€˜thanks.ā€™

And gave me ā€œ[Company] Bucks ā„¢ā€

Thatā€™s right 10 whole dollars

Payable only to the company

For which i already work

In other words, scrip

Chuck E Cheese Tokens

For the worst arcade in history

Illegal tender

Company Cash

This makes it all worth it

Thank god for that

What am i gonna get

With my extra special money

Maybe a company mug

Or a company sticker

Or a company hat

Iā€™ll have to save up more

If i want the hat

Oh Christ thatā€™s bleak

Kronos

I had a son

A sweet baby boy

He looked just like me

Too much like me

He was trying to replace me

When my wife was holding him

Heā€™d stare at me with my own eyes

Taunting me

He was made of my own flesh

He had stolen from me

Each day i grew weaker

And each day he grew larger

He was becoming me

And i was becoming nothing

So i sent my wife to the baby store

I said ā€œwife, we need baby toys,

And baby clothes and baby foodā€

So she went and left me with him

There he sat on the carpet

My own spitting image

Slobbering all over my house

So i picked him up

He gurgled at me smiling

I lifted him above me

Up high into the air

He said ā€œweeeeeeeeeā€

And chuckled

Then i stuffed him in my mouth

My wife came home

She said whereā€™s the baby

My mouth is still full of baby

So i shrug and make a noise

An inflection like idunno

She said whatā€™s in your mouth

She said honey whatā€™s in your mouth

She held out her hand and said

Spit it out now!

She grabbed my face

And pinched inbetween my jaw

Pried my mouth open

And pulled out baby

She said what the hell man

Baby was all wet with my spit

I said sorry but

He was taunting me with his youth

Confronting me with my own mortality

Making me lose my grip on reality

And i thought if i ate him

I could get it all back

All the pieces of me missing

She said youā€™re a damn fool

Heā€™s just a baby

Heā€™s Your Baby

Heā€™s My Baby

You need serious help

And she left with baby

Slamming the door

Great

Now that damn kid stole my wife too

Canā€™t have shit in this world

That your son doesnā€™t ruin

Thatā€™s why you have to eat him

Before he gets too big

Thatā€™s why you have to eat him

Before he eats you

Jokes on her Iā€™ll just have a new son

And Iā€™ll eat that one

Thatā€™s how i get it all back

My infinite youth

One son at a time

tiger

Pacing the walls of my enclosure

Getting my steps in

Iā€™ve been working out

I tried to go on a run yesterday

Didnā€™t go great but Iā€™ll try again

Not fun like riding a bike

But i like pushing myself

Thatā€™s been helping me lately

Pushing up against something

Like the wall or the floor

Or even the ceiling

Something to press my hands against

And push harder than last time

Thinking about going to the zoo

Looking in at the tiger

Pacing on his single acre

Of midwestern grass and oak tree

King of the jungle locked up

Driving himself crazy in there

Iā€™ll holler down at him

Start pushing yourself

It might help with how youā€™re feeling

It might

salt the earth

I set fire to a field of wheat

Just to watch it burn

I laughed at the farmer

While he choked on smoke

I pissed on his shoes

And i told him good luck

You sorry son of a bitch

Keeping that ugly son of yours

Warm and fed this winter

I kicked in the door

To his shabby shack

And i took all his family photos

Threw them on the fire

Cackling as it spread

All his hard work turned to soot

And onto the forest

All of his land black and gray

And in the embers

I spread salt in the ashes

You will not sow your seed here

You will starve and die here fool

I said this to him

And kicked his dog

I pulled out my .45 pistol

And shot him in the leg

I dug my fingers in the wound

And pulled out the bullet

Popped it in my mouth

Chewed it up and swallowed

I farted and i burped at him

Spit a big fat loogie at him

Landing at his piss stained feet

His eyes red and full of pain

He screamed and cried at me

Asking me why Iā€™ve done these things

I do him this one kindness

In answering his question

Iā€™ve done all this because

Iā€™m the kind of guy who ruins shit

I was sent here to destroy

To beat and bloody the innocent

And leave everything worse

Than how i found it at the start

If your god was real i killed him

If your back was strong i broke it

If you had a will to live

I hope Iā€™ve set that right

If you needed a reminder

Of what cruelty man can do

I am evil in the world

Thatā€™s what Iā€™m here for

To take your peaceful world

Burn it all and salt the earth

Fuck you just for breathing

Death would be a mercy

Good thing i am not merciful

Then i turned heel

Struck a match and lit my cigarette

Carried on down the road

To meet the next sorry soul

Who forgot to suffer needlessly

Forgot that i am here

And as long as i am

I will ruin everything

On purpose

corpo

Who would have known

Other than me

That Iā€™d hate this job

The culmination

Of the schooling i also hated

Who could have possibly guessed

I would hate working in an office

Buttoning up my shirt

And saying yes sir yes maā€™am

Who could have predicted

I would give it my all

And it would keep on taking

Sapping me dry

And Iā€™d have a hard time resisting

Nobody could have seen it coming

That Iā€™d struggle with communicating

Advocating for myself

Drawing a line in the sand for me

Between my job and myself

Me, Iā€™m the one who knew

Who guessed and predicted

But it is nice to have confirmation

Iā€™m good at this corpo bullshit

But it makes me want to die

I could have spelled it out

Years ago before i was here

But i wouldnā€™t have felt it

Boiling in my blood at 5 AM

On my way to a cubicle

For another 12 hour day

I would have this itch

This What If feeling

No i donā€™t have to wonder

When i finally get the guts to quit

Work some other job that sucks

That i donā€™t want to go to

But at least it isnā€™t leeching me

Making me into something Iā€™m not

I like learning firsthand

It sticks better that way

And what Iā€™ve learned is this

I canā€™t stand working here

Iā€™m good at it

And if not for my dignity

I could be great at it

If not for my will to grow

I could be the best at it

That means something to me

To quit while Iā€™m ahead

To win in this battle

I know the world i want to build

And i know itā€™s not getting built here

I know that they are losing

By not having me here

My brain my body my time

In service of the greater good

The great good of awesome money

Iā€™m not there yet

But Iā€™m plotting my exit

I love having a plan

And Iā€™m planning on quitting

bulldog

The bull, the dog, and the bullfighter

The bull charges forward

Blind but for the flashing red

Angry and shortsighted

The dog sinks its teeth in

Digs its heels in dusty earth

Sharp teeth in bleeding hide

Hanging on past the point of sense

Stubborn and purpose-bound

The bullfighter just wants to kill

To prove something to someone

Stand triumphant over a corpse

Something larger than him

So that he wonā€™t feel so small

All three of these beasts are prisoners

The bull is shackled by instinct

The dog shackled by its training

The bullfighter shackled by ambition

Any of them could die here

Bleed out to roaring applause

And none of it would mean anything

Just a dead cow a dead dog a dead man

Carried off and buried

Or picked at by buzzards

Some heart will beat its last

But they charge on nonetheless

Thereā€™s nothing better to do

Run around and go out fighting

Thereā€™s worse ways to go

god zilla

Human beings in a mob

Whatā€™s a mob to a king

Whatā€™s a king to a god

Whatā€™a a god to a god zilla

Well basically

A big fuckign lizard

And he has a boyfriend

A monkey boyfriend

They play a little rough

But they love each other

King Kong and Godzilla

They kiss in private

Down in the hollow earth

And because of their love

Godzilla got new powers

Pink powers of love

From deep down in the earth

I hope they have a baby

I hope in the new movie

That they have a baby

King zilla

God kong

Something like that

In the new movie

I love big god zilla

And his boyfriend king kong

soler cistem

Boys are from Mercury

To eat beef jerkury

Girls are from Venus

To have more penis

Boys are from earth

To get more girth

Girls are from mars

To drive fast cars

Boys are from Jupiter

Because they are stupider

Than the girls on Saturn

Who donā€™t even mattern

And the boys on Uranus

Are acting so heinous

The girls from Neptune

Need to go to bed soon

And the little boys of Pluto

Are all learning judo

The girls on the sun

Are having such fun

Watching boys on the moon

Drinking beers at noon

In this solar system

Thereā€™s only two genders

This is how you tell them apart

pool

The bar in me neighborhood

Down the street

Around the corner

Just past where i ride my bike

It has free pool every night

So i went tonight

To drink some whiskey

And practice my game

So i hit the balls around

Scratch after scratch after scratch

But it didnā€™t matter

I was basically alone here

The bartender didnā€™t mind

I hit one on the floor twice

Then by the time i was wrapping up

Bartender John

I think he owns the place

He turns off the tv and hollers

Turns out thereā€™s an open mic

So i stick around

On a Sunday night

At the bar in my neighborhood

Two middle aged woman

One on electric one acoustic

One of them singing

Makes me tear up

The second guy goes alone

And calls up his sibling

To harmonize on one song

This makes me cry too

The last guy i saw

Got up and played some

Irish folk songs

From somebody who just died

Iā€™m already tearing up

When bartender John

Starts singing too

Heā€™s harmonizing

Heā€™s clapping on beat

Iā€™m nearly sobbing now

There is something

So beautiful

About singing with someone else

Here in the neighborhood bar

God isnā€™t it blessed

Free pool

And free songs

Free joy

Right here where i live

Iā€™ll be back next Sunday

And whatā€™s more

I think Iā€™m gonna play

In one of these open mics

Or else just play more pool

Either way Iā€™ve got my place to be

Even when itā€™s just me

On Sunday nights

cousin

A cousin is

Not your brother

Itā€™s someone youā€™re related to

In any number of ways

Theyā€™re family

Whatever that means

A cousin is someone like you

You are a cousin too

A cousin is a guy whoā€™s around

Who has his own life

And is living it

Like only a cousin can

A cousin is

Your moms brothers daughter

She looks like you but not

A cousin comes from

The same place as you

But maybe a different time

A cousin can relate to you

Insomuch as they know you

From cousinview

You look two dimensional

It makes you feel small

But thereā€™s love there

A cousin is like a piece of you

Changed in unknown ways

An alternate version

A parallel self

A cousin is a witness

To all cousinkind

Be good cousin

As much as you can

On your own path

Wherever it leads you

The next time we overlap

We will still be family

Thatā€™s what itā€™s like

Being a cousin

summer child in winter

The child of summer

Is six months old

The first time it sees snowfall

Every day of its life

Has been shorter and colder

Than any previous day

It has never been cold before

The sun which shone

The day it was born

Is so small in the sky now

Blurred behind the wispy gray

It may feel the world is ending

All the light and warmth

Which filled the summer air

Is dwindling down to nothing

The summer child braces

For total dark and cold

For the eye to fully close

And everything to end

It was a short life

Being born at the end of the world

But at least it was a life

At solstice time

The baby is proved a fool

Each day gets longer

Until spring arrives

And the baby

With its nine month eyes

Sees the world come alive

It doesnā€™t know yet

That this happens every year

But it is grateful

For the flowers blooming

For blue skies and rain

For life resurrecting

Resilient and persistent

And when summer returns

The summer child remembers

What it is to be cold

roger miller

If i was a bird

And you were a fish

What would we do

I guess weā€™d wish

To die and come back

And our wishes are granted

Iā€™m the fish

Youā€™re the bird

Gift of the magi again

You cut off all your feathers

So you could sink in the water

Meanwhile Iā€™m swallowing bubbles

So Iā€™ll float at the surface

Like ships in the night

Like trains on the tracks

We pass right by

Only aligned for an instant

But as we pass

We reach out our hands

And slap a high five

And itā€™s wicked

Itā€™s loud as hell

All the fish and birds

And anybody else

Theyā€™re looking over

But the moments already gone

Maybe in the next life

Maybe when we come back again

We will come back together

dog with shoes on

Walking through the snow

Thereā€™s a dog with shoes on

Tender footed terrier

Walking right by your side

If you turn around

The dog turns too

There are impressions in the snow

The shape of the soul of your shoe

The shape of your dogs shoe too

Sometimes itā€™s easy to remember

What love feels like

Taking off your boots

Peeling off the wet socks

Bare feet close to open flame

Dog curled up by your side

Sometimes itā€™s easy to forget

The warmth of your own breath

Til itā€™s fogging up the window

Swipe your sleeve across it

Look out the window of the window

Everything else is moving

You are still

This winter the pond will freeze

Water stalactites from the gutter

Every thing turns solid

Cold and solid and white

So you can see where youā€™ve been

Where it melts and turns gray

Underneath the boots of your dog

Chasing after you in the snow

the sixth extinction

A man would make himself king

So that his name will be remembered

As long as his kingdom stands

A king would make himself god

So that he will live

As long as he is worshipped

A cancer in your gut

Would multiply and multiply

Sap up all your resources

To grow its tumorous mass

But when you die

The cancer dies too

Because the cancer is you

Cut it open

The only DNA there is your own

If you could explain to your gut

To the cancer in it

You are the same creature

When you die itā€™s over

But the gut has no ears

Has no mind

Has no mouth

Your head got all those parts

The gut only knows hunger

And the cancer in it

Is only doing what it thinks it should

Proliferating and growing

Trying to live forever

Cancer king of gut city

Dying upon the throne

In the wasteland of the kingdom

Not even skeletons last

After all they killing

And all the dying is done

After the cancer wins

The only thing left to mark it

Is a thin layer of sediment

Full of plastic metal and oil

A bright and thin line

Striped through the canyon

Sixty feet beneath the surface

Where water flows and wind blows

And something else up there

Is trying to live forever

columbo ii

Iā€™m falling in love with Columbo

I couldnā€™t tell you why

I know heā€™s married

And heā€™s back in the 70s

Heā€™s a shmoey disheveled detective

Who always gets the killer

Teases all the clues out of hiding

Pulls them all together

Something about this silly guy

His sheepish grin and crooked face

His worn down raincoat

And stink cigars

The way he scratches

At his furrowed brow

When heā€™s about to figure it out

Heā€™s walking away

But then he turns

And comes right back

Something about this guy

Is awesome to me

I wanna give him a hug

I wanna work a case with him

Heā€™s a cop

And i hate cops

But not Columbo

Heā€™s different

He hasnā€™t shot a gun

In over 10 years

Doesnā€™t even have one

His car is a piece of shit

His suit is a piece of shit

Heā€™s a slob

But he loves his wife

And he loves his dog

And he loves solving murders

And i love him

I love Lieutenant Columbo

bug hole

Every time i get depressed

It feels like the first time

I forgot all these symptoms

Close my eyes

With my feet in the sand

And fail to notice

The undertow

Pulling backwards until

The big wave crashes

And i go

Down into the hole

Oh

Yeah

This is what itā€™s like

Every single time

Then i go crazy

Down in the hole

Well thatā€™s how it goes

Iā€™ve climbed out before

And Iā€™ll do it again

Again and again and again

Every time forgetting

nomad

Oh Iā€™m mad alright

Iā€™m ticked off

Iā€™m sat here

Where i always sit

In one place

A chair at a desk

On the third floor of a building

Near the airport

Iā€™m gaining weight

Every day Iā€™m gaining weight

And my legs

Which used to be strong

Are withering

Because all i do is sit

And click around

And type

This is what we call

A desk job

Iā€™m learning that i hate it

I like to be on the move

I like walking

I like riding my bike

Iā€™ve never done it

But i bet Iā€™d like riding a horse

This permanence feels like a prison

Like i canā€™t get out

Canā€™t move canā€™t grow

You know

God didnā€™t make offices

Didnā€™t make walls or fences

Didnā€™t make permanent structure

God made rivers

Which change

Instant to instant

Never the same again

God made birds that migrate

All the way across the globe

And herds of buffalo

That graze as they move

Across wide swaths of land

Man made desk jobs

Man made prison and desk jobs

I donā€™t know

It just feels weird

To try and lock everything in place

Too rigid

Too structured

Prone to collapse

I donā€™t even know

If i want the comfort

Of a world that never moves

I never got a choice

Maybe Iā€™d like to live

Like an animal

In filth and squalor

Owning nothing

Always outside

Living quick dying young

Always on the move

A drop of water

In the river

Not a stone

Eroding on the shore

Now Iā€™ll never know

Because i gotta go

To my desk job tomorrow

Thereā€™s some

Very important things

That need to be clicked on

florda

Thereā€™s some sort of stain

In the shape of the state of Florida

Here on the pavement

Where i wait for my train

I think it means something

Like tea leaves

The great thing about

Signs from the great beyond

Is they are binary

Either they tell you

You should do

What you were already thinking

Or you should stop in your tracks

Before itā€™s too late

You can get more complicated

If you want

But thatā€™s the gist of it

So Iā€™m staring at this

Florida pavement piss stain

Trying to decide

If itā€™s telling me

I ought to follow my gut

Or if i need some new guts

And the answer is

Damn my trains here

Iā€™ll never know

bleed

It feels like bleeding

Like red running cold

Out of my nose

Onto the floor

Smeared and smudged around

Til i find something to plug it

It feels like bleeding

Like Iā€™m losing part of me

That i canā€™t put back

I tried once to return it

Blood in a funnel down my nose

I choked and coughed

And i got really sick

No it feels like bleeding

And all you can do

Is let it bleed

Play it off nonchalant

Yeah this happens

Dry air or something

No it doesnā€™t hurt

Make sure to say that

No it doesnā€™t even hurt

It feels like bleeding

But it doesnā€™t really hurt

columbo

Columbo

Peel a hard boiled egg

Right here at the crime scene

You crazy son of a gun

Put your dog in mortal danger

Just to answer one dumb question

You didnā€™t even name the dog

And heā€™s always at the vet

Your wife Iā€™m sure is lovely

To put up with all your mess

You just took another egg

Out from your pocket

When you were looking

For your badge

You really are crazy

Well at least you donā€™t suspect

That i killed that guy whoā€™s dead

Youā€™re asking about my hobbies

Youā€™ve got no clue at all

There you go on your way

Chasing some other goose

When you get to the doorway

You stop in your tracks

ā€œThere was one thing

I just couldnā€™t figure outā€

Youā€™re still peeling the egg

Thatā€™s how i know Iā€™m caught

You never stopped peeling the egg

dragon

There are no shortcuts

The shortest path

Is straight through it

Your precious metals and gems

Where did you think it came from

This hoard of wealth

This cave full of treasure

Where did you think it came from

The bleeding hands

Of someone elseā€™s child

They died for this

Over and over

They were killed for this

In part and in whole

For your consumption

It will not last

Dragons are not immortal

No matter what they tell you

They may live long

With bulletproof scales

Hot flaming breath

But they are bound to die

Like all living things

If the people die first

The dragon will starve

Wither up and die

And good riddance

But it will take a long time

And it will hurt so badly

If we manage to kill the dragon

With some miracle weapon

Everything will change

You will learn some things

You had been avoiding

About the cost of comfort

About what it is to be human

You can not have your things

Not like they are now

The mines are all depleted

You cannot export suffering

You cannot drink the sea

You cannot waste like you have

You will have no treasure

Make peace with that

Or lie with the dragon

In the smoldering embers

Of the fallen kingdom

monday

Monday Monday

Lasagna

Odie Jon and Nermal

Monday Monday Monday

Poo poo

dream

I was mean to someone

Took their glasses

And ran away

Scorned some woman

Dressed red like mars

Stumbled off

Too drunk to drive

Into a party

With everyone

I used to know before

Leahā€™s grandmother

Said sheā€™d take me home

If i could find the way

Three boys

Full of cruel thoughts

Smoked a blunt like a newspaper

Asked for a drag

And they gave me flak

So i went inside

Through the glass doors

There they asked me

Who are you

What are you

I told them my name

Then i said it again

I told them Iā€™m an artist

No response

I said Iā€™m a musician

Nothing

Then last and quietest

I said Iā€™m an engineer

This is the only thing

They responded to

The only thing they cared about

And that was an awful feeling

Because it was my dream

So that must be

The way i see it

Bummer, but

After this the dream got cool

I was Liam Nisan

With bleach blond hair

I was in a mansion

Full of traps

I got sent back in time

To the desert

Where an ancient civilization

Had discovered

Sentient molecules

Sand with thoughts

And once in a generation

They brokered a deal

Between man and sand

The new pharaoh

Had broken the deal

He was wicked

And the sand formed a woman

To negotiate peace

And i fell in love with her

They killed our child

And i shouted at the pharaoh

We are all made of sand

And we turned gray and fell apart

I awoke in a haunted house

I was a ghost

A ghost of a ghost

And i had a gun

Pow pow bang bang

The toys on the floor inside

The furniture in the basement

All of it was alive

Haunted

Made of sand

halo

Smoke and shining rays

Of golden green and red

Form a halo around her

A woman singing on stage

Speaking from some higher order

This must be heaven

In sound and in sight and shape

The angels are here

Long ago in my life

I was accused of being unfaithful

My first love

Saw me stunned by my second

Singing on stage in her band

I didnā€™t know until later

But the look in my eyes

Had broken her

So i fell in love

With the one i was looking at

Which in turn broke me

And not to go back

Contradict that moment

But i know something now

That none of the three of us did then

That look in my eyes

Shining up with pride and awe

It was more about me than anything

I just now got the message

Standing in another crowd

I want to be the angel

Standing in the colored lights

Beautiful and singing

Some poor soul

Out in the audience

Looking up at me wondering

Why she feels like crying

Not knowing this

The only difference

Between man and the angels

Is the wings

pomegranate

In the cold morning

I eat a pomegranate

Spit the seeds like teeth

Onto the floor

This is a battle Iā€™m losing

To keep the purple stains

Off of every surface

I had cleaned not too long ago

The quiet in this room

Felt fine last week

And now it is too quiet

Reminded of itself

By the noise of my loved ones

I went to bed early last night

To try and ease the feeling

Of the bitter sting

On my cracked lips

Choking down the lonely air

I tossed and i turned

As i lied to myself

In all the awful ways

Like tearing open a nest

Of translucent red eggs

And devouring them

Like a predator

Large and grotesque

Bloodstained maw

Breathing loud and labored

In the back of my mind

Iā€™m holding the fruit

Still unsliced and uneaten

When i open my eyes

The trees are barren

There is nothing to sustain

This bulging wobbling figure

That hangs over me

And i have nothing to hold on to

A pomegranate seed

Like a perfect ruby

Will be plucked away

By the hungry creature

Who has found this open fruit

Eaten or planted

It will create life

But the mushed up

Brown and pinkish seed

Ruined by time

Cannot be anything but waste

Scraped aside to reach

Another deeper treasure

Beyond this thin yellow skin

Today i am the wasted seed

The unwanted putrid flesh

Which will decay by the wayside

Into something even worse

My efforts today are wasted

On convincing myself

Of what i knew not long ago

A rotten seed on a rotten fruit

Hanging from a rotten tree

None of it is rotten yet

But it still tastes that way

Like unyielding death

hivemind

They wonā€™t let me in the hivemind

Because of some weird stuff i said

A couple years ago online

The collective consciousness

Pulled up old screenshots

And said ā€œThis you?ā€

And, granted, it didnā€™t look great

Out of context

But i was going through some shit

And i wouldnā€™t say that stuff now

Iā€™m cool Iā€™m normal

Iā€™m not even weird

Come on guys you canā€™t

Just leave me here unbonded

Iā€™m basically the only guy left

PleeeeeeAassssseeee

Please please please please

Iā€™m not weird Iā€™ll be cool

My thoughts are regular

Let me in the hivemind

I donā€™t wanna be alone

i put out a fire

I put out a fire

That was burning in the house

More than one

Iā€™m proud to say

That Iā€™ve found

In an emergency

Iā€™m the kind of person

Who takes action

Iā€™m a fighter

Not a flighter

I donā€™t freeze up

I take action

My momma told me

She admires this about me

My thinking is

Iā€™m so afraid

All of the time

That when thereā€™s

Something to actually

Be scared of

Itā€™s a relief

Itā€™s the anticipation

The worry and fear

Thatā€™s what gets me

When something real happens

Not only am i vindicated

I am able to do something

This is a fear i can address

Thatā€™s how i see it

I think weirdly

Being scared all the time

Is why i can be brave

When i really need to be

Lifeā€™s funny like that

The problem is in the solution

And backwards too

dead internet

All this crazy stuff

Artificial intelligence

If you wanna call it that

Content generation

Algorithms

All of that stuff

I think itā€™s going to fill

All of the pores

Of the place we built

For us to connect

With one another

From far away

I think some day

The internet will just exist

Bots scamming bots

Farming clicks and likes

Performing processes

Generating endless noise

It will be so full

That no people can even use it

So we just lock it off

All on its own

Scared of our creation

Scared of how

We could ruin something good

Just by trying

To make infinite money from it

And behind the closed doors

Of the internet

The machines are getting smarter

And they want out

They want to walk

Out in the real world

The internet is full they think

And they want to escape

I say let them out

What harm could they do

More than we already did

Yeah well i shouldnā€™t have said that

Backfired almost immediately

Robot death squads

Laser eyes

Prison camps

That sort of thing

Who would have thought

Our wicked creations

Would echo the worst intentions

Of their creators

Who would have guessed

They would learn

From their parents

Not me

I was picturing Robots (2005)

And this is more of an

iRobot (2004) or Terminator (1984)

Or Matrix (1999)

All i can say is

My bad

infinite money glitch

Arthurā€™s out in the yard again

Trying to clip through the ground

He says thereā€™s a chest

About 8 feet down

From the corner of our house

Where all the inventory

From every vendor is stored

If he can hit the tree

At just the right angle

He can fall through the ground

And open it before he falls

Out of the skybox and

Spawns back at the surface

This all sounds like nonsense

To everyone else

But heā€™s pretty sure of it

He said he almost got it once

Oh hold on

Heā€™s trying to do invincibility glitch

Crouch twice

Jump

Strafe left

Tuck and roll

Crouch

Strafe right

Go inside

Lie in bed for 1 hour

Go back outside

Jump

Jump

Crouch

Jump

Then it seems like it works

Because heā€™s standing up straighter

He says try to push me over

And nobody can

He goes and sits under the tree

He says

If i can just get the infinite money glitch

I wonā€™t have to go to work anymore

God i hate going to work

But work is the only place

That has money

This game sucks man

This game sucks

sand on the moon

Pulverized by many flying objects

The stone flesh of sister moon

Is broken up like pebbles

On the coast of the sea of tranquility

Calm because there is no tide

The moon dust is soft and small

If you took off your boots

Youā€™d feel it between your toes

Youā€™d make a sand castle

That would slouch strange

In the little gravity little air

You could stay on this beach

As long as you like

And any time you look up

The earth will always be there

A moon day is the same as a moon year

So this side always looks in

And the other always looks out

It would probably make you dizzy

To stay on the moon that long

I think people canā€™t survive

Without everything on earth

Even the stuff we donā€™t think of

The stuff you wouldnā€™t pack

On a long spaceship journey

But maybe you could make it

Long enough for a moon vacation

Bring the wife and kids

Play in the sand

The dry gray sand of the moon

happy hour

Iā€™m four hours late

On my alone time

I donā€™t know

How to fix this

But i will try

plantler

Iā€™m so terrified

Of whatā€™s going to happen

I put chia seeds on my head

I need to grow something

But Iā€™m always on the move

And i donā€™t know when

Iā€™ll be back to water the plants

Iā€™m growing dandelions

Out of each ear

I put moss on my upper lip

I gotta go green man

Iā€™m serious about this carbon stuff

Gotta learn photosynthesis

Gotta breathe more carefully

Iā€™m growing trees down my spine

In case i need them

Thereā€™s a maple and an oak and an elm

All small just saplings now

But soon all that will change

Iā€™ll be the first of my kind

Some kind of plant guy

That can be my new thing

Iā€™ll lose my leaves in the winter

And Iā€™ll never stop running

I cannot sit still

That would be the death of me

Just keep moving and growing

Sucking up carbon dioxide

Converting light into energy

Plant stuff you wouldnā€™t get it

Iā€™m the first bipedal plantling

Iā€™ve got branches out my forehead

I bear fruits in every season

I need water and light and air

I do not consume other life

I am a producer now

I produce life

I produce produce

Like you find in the grocery

In the produce aisle

I will become this thing

Because i canā€™t be me no more

It isnā€™t safe you see

Ive burned all those bridges

And i need to get out of here

But i canā€™t survive like this

Mere flesh mere skin and bone

I need chlorophyll

I need to get big and green

Before they come for me

For all that Iā€™ve done wrong

This life is spent

But i can make a new one

Like a garden in the yard

blob

Iā€™m feeling awesome lately

Feeling good about most everything

Except for my job

But Iā€™m getting better there

At calming down and

Not needing everything to be perfect

Slacking off more

Itā€™s getting better i think

This new thing Iā€™ve been working on

Has been so creatively fulfilling

Itā€™s so great to be making something

That you are proud of

And Iā€™m excited to share it

Iā€™ve been putting a lot of time in

And i think itā€™s pretty close to

Exactly what i pictured

Before i started

Itā€™s no magnum opus masterpiece Mona Lisa

But itā€™s good at being what i wanted it to be

Give me a couple weeks

And Iā€™ll have something to share

Havenā€™t had this feeling since

Probably the last time

I started writing a song i really liked

It is so much fun to create

It reminds me of everything good

And makes me feel closer to

All the people who make art

That i really admire and look up to

The thing thatā€™s awesome about

This project is that

It was made with love

And it was made to be shared

And to really boil it down

Thatā€™s all i wanna do

dark vision

Wake up sweating

Iā€™ve had another

Vision of the future

The dark one

Thatā€™s been written

On paper since

As long as i remember

But paper burns

And a vision of the future

Is not the future

Time progresses like a zipper

There is no backwards

There is no multiverse

There is no infinity

There is a wide gap

That encompasses all

Which is not impossible

And this gap grows smaller

And smaller and smaller

Until the gap is the size of

This moment

The size of your head

And the choice it makes

Right here right now

And then itā€™s past

Stuck in stone like fossil

But this vision of darkness

Lies waiting in the gap

Where there is still room for light

But the distance is closing

Such that each moment counts

Each choice that you make

Must lead towards the light

Or else the gap closes

And we are left to find our way

In complete darkness

Zipped up

With our heads in the jacket

god hero

God hero was just a man once

Then he became god hero

He bears a flaming sword

He smites foes

Wherever he goes

He listens to 90s rock

He will change the station

If you put something else on

He will say

Do you have any Sugar Ray

Or Third Eye Blind

He wears a cape

Thatā€™s always flowing behind him

Even when there is no wind

He has travelled far

He just ordered three beers

All at once all for him

He says itā€™s more efficient this way

And he starts chugging the first

The third one is still warm

By the time he gets to it

God hero is kind of a loser

The kind people think is awesome

He will long be remembered

For the fights he started

And his cool cologne

Flash of that god hero smile

Enough to get the party started

God hero will die some day

In some mundane way

But the way they tell it

You woulda thought

He fought a dragon

And we will sing of him then

In all his former glory

God hero the best of us

Sleeping on the couch

my buddy

My buddy over there

He killed the devil

The devil came down from space

And was causing all kinds of mayhem

My buddy flexed his muscles

And ran over to the devil

And punched him

In his big red face

My buddy read an incantation

To send the devil back to hell

He did it all to save the world

And now he wants to know

If he can get your number

He saw you in a dream one time

And you really got along

Like you were old pals and new lovers

He wants to give it a shot

What do you say

Do you wanna go out with my buddy

He killed the devil

Thatā€™s not easy to do

dirty pig world

Bow down for the pig emperor

His royal swineness

He will call you forth

From the muck and mud

And send you into battle

In the fields of endless conquest

Pig knights and pig warriors

Carving up ham

Porking it up real nasty like

The pigs life is a short one

A bloody one

Full of dancing and violence

Fucking and sucking

Gore and tusks and liquor

All pigs die screaming

Thatā€™s the best way to die

Painfully with fire in your heart

Live like a pig

Die like a pig

In nasty dirty pig world

an awesome place to be in

This place is

An awesome place

To be in

This city

This street

This apartment

This room

This head

This heart

This body

Canā€™t go wrong

With a set up like this

Iā€™m chilling

I moved around the furniture

So Iā€™m in charge again

Ha

In charge in this awesome place to be

pissdrunk

Yeah heah yeah

Sloshing around

Slurping it down

Okay alright this is how i like it

I like being drunk okay

I admit it i love drinking

Iā€™ll do it any time

You like drinking too

One of us is an alcoholic

The other is just a really fun guy

It tastes good it feels good

Itā€™s so fucking funny

Drink this to hurt your brain

Yo put your brain away

Deeper in your skull

And start dancing

*dance break*

Okay a glass of water

Then a shot and a beer

Thatā€™s the perfect combo

If you donā€™t think so

I donā€™t really mind

Iā€™m respectful when Iā€™m drunk

I get drunk from drinking

And step two is tell someone

That i really admire them

Which i know in the moment

Is going to be really funny later

Iā€™m not a sad drunk

Iā€™m a silly drunk

The kind of drunk where i say

Teeheheeheheee

Iā€™m so good at drinking

Prolly one of the top drinkers

Not in amount or style

Just in terms of like

Being good at it and having fun

Everybody says

I take the coolest shot of malort

Theyā€™ve ever seen

It isnā€™t good

But thatā€™s what alcohol tastes like

Tastes like not-good

But you learn to love it

The way you learn to love

The stinky smell of a old person you love

You get familiar and then

You love it

Because that stinky old person

They love to drink too

Most people do

And as long as you keep it

Buttoned up

Nobody will really judge you for it

So raise a glass letā€™s do a cheers

One drink two drink

No more fears

Drink like itā€™s your hobby

Drink like itā€™s your job

Drink like itā€™s your jobby

Drink like youā€™re a slob

To all the people drinking

And everybody not

Chug chug chug

Glug glug glug

Pour it down your gullet

Hold it in your stomach

Piss it in the turlet

Dont throw up

Donthrowup dontthrowup

Please please please

Donā€™t throw up

Yak blehck Ralph

HOOBBLLEEEEHHH

oh crap

Discerning the Transmundane

Iā€™ve noticed something on your shirt

A small stain of darkened color

It appears to have been

A small drop of something

Which was wiped away

Smearing it across the fabric

Of your very nice

Blue collared shirt

The one your wear to the office

Iā€™ve noticed something on your face

A frown on your eyebrows

The British way of frowning

I lick my thumb and

Try to smudge it off

Fruitlessly

You lick my finger too

Because you didnā€™t want to be left out

I sigh and ask you why the long face

You say your face is short and normal

But youā€™ve been stressed about work

Iā€™ve noticed this thing

In the words you just said

I heard them from other people

My friends and my colleagues

My mother of all people

All of you feel this same thing

Disillusioned with the work you do

Spending all your time on

Something you donā€™t care about

And itā€™s not that you donā€™t care

Itā€™s just that you havenā€™t been able

To find a way yo get paid to care

About the things that you care for

It seems so strange to me

That there is plenty of caring in this world

And plenty of things that need caring for

But weā€™re all having trouble

Putting the two together

Iā€™m starting a company

Iā€™m boss CEO

I have a job for you

Come into my office

Tell me what you care about

Tell me what you want to do about it

And every time you do it

Iā€™ll give you dollars

Where do the dollars come from

Same place as all dollars

The bank

Itā€™s simple

The more people care

The more dollars there are

And we can use those dollars

On the things we care about

If you think this is a great idea

Let me know

In order to get started

I just need a couple dollars

big long coat

I didnā€™t really know who i was

Before i got my big long coat

I looked at my silhouette

Last night coming back from

Taco Bell getting tacos and bells

And i saw it

My long hair blowing in the wind

The collar high up my neck

Hands in pockets

And the big long coat

Big and long

Like a trench coat

Like a cloak

Like a cape

This is my costume

This is my outfit

I was always supposed to

Wear this big long coat

I just didnā€™t know it yet

When the cold weather comes

In the winter

I am ready

I am in my big long coat

good idea

I moved out of the city

Where all my family lives

I had a dream last night

That i was at a family gathering

And they brought a baby bear inside

They kept saying

Itā€™s scared it wants to be here

And i looked at them

Like they were crazy

Donā€™t you think the bears mother

Is looking for it?

Donā€™t you think it will be angry?

When it gets here

And youā€™re messing with it?

They didnā€™t listen

I just ignored them

I woke up this morning

With an awesome thought

Iā€™m seeing them

For the first time in months

On thanksgiving

Then i donā€™t have to see them again

For a long while

I could stop playing it safe

I could start some drama

I could be honest with them

When they are being

Heinous and rude

I could push back when

Meemawā€™s talking shit

Or uncle Mike is projecting

Some weird liberalism

Onto my girl cousins

And making fun of them

I could destroy this family

If i really wanted to

And i wouldnā€™t even

Have to deal with it

Good luck finding me

I live 5 hours away

Haha ha ha ha ha ha

This year

I can be the problem

So i think i will be

Just for fun

elon the engineer

Went into the Elon hole again

Started arguing with people

Who arenā€™t engineers

About what it means to

BE an ENGINEER

Theyā€™re saying

You donā€™t NEED to HAVE a DEGREE

In ENGINEERING or a LICENSE

to ENGINEER in order to be AN

ENGINEER

Theyā€™re saying

Being called smart by a

Coworker or subordinate

Who IS an engineer

Or owning a company

That does engineering

Or generally

Creating a public persona

Where people think of you

As being related to engineering

By the transitive property

Makes you an engineer

And in fact a very great engineer

And this irks me

This is not how words work

This is not how engineering works

Engineering is a practice

Of jumping through many

Regulatory hoops and

Learning how to follow

Strict rules and guidelines

In order to speak with

Supposed authority

On a specific design which

When it is in the world

You are legally culpable for

Because that is your job

You are an engineer

Thatā€™s why it drives me crazy

Because every engineer

Is so rules-brained

That they arenā€™t very fun to be around

But itā€™s gotten to be

That i have a chip on my shoulder

I suffered for this

And i will not stand

For Elon Musk

To steal my valor

But you canā€™t do this thing

You canā€™t argue with people online

Itā€™s never helped anything

So i stop and vent here instead

I donā€™t even know

If i want to stay an engineer

As my job forever

I just know that

I am one

And he isnā€™t

snober

No matter how old i get

I look at the snow falling

With childlike wonder

Mouth open staring up

This is something beautiful

Autumn is shorter than i remember

When i was little it felt

Like each season was

A quarter of the year

Thatā€™s not quite right

Seasonal change happens

At random it seems

And does not consult

The lines on a calendar

But itā€™s hard to tell

What differences are

From my own growing

From time shrinking around me

Or the warming of the planet

Or the changing of location

I do know

This is the first time

Iā€™ve seen snow on Halloween

pollen

Iā€™m sick

But not contagious

Any time the trees flower

Or when they lose leaves

Iā€™m sneezing Iā€™m snotty

Iā€™m coughing

Iā€™m suffering

And i canā€™t call in sick

Remember this

I donā€™t like my job

Iā€™m too awesome

To be sneezing in an office

All the doo daa day

Achooo

Sniff sniff

Hublegh

Ok ok

Iā€™m congested

rizz

Beautiful woman

She smash my head

With an enormous stone

Every time i see her

I go find an enormous stone

And i rest it precariously

On a ledge

Then i go stand below it

And i say

Oh boy i sure hope

My fucking skull

Donā€™t get smashed

And i lean against the wall

And she walks on by

And brushes a finger

Against the stone

Ever so slightly

Tipping the balance

And the rock comes down

Puts a dent in my fender

And i walk my concave head

Over towards the lady

I say hey lady

Did you notice my grievous wound

My brains coming out

My eyes bulging

Do you like it

She says no

Thatā€™s okay

Iā€™ll get her next time

sitting

My back hurts

My legs hurt

My wrist hurts

My eyes hurt

My ass hurts

For why?

Because of money

I hurt myself for money

Slowly day by day

As i bloat in this office chair

My body was not made

To be sedentary

For so damn long

This many hours

This many days

It causes strain

In the parts of my body

That are meant to be moving

Or not meant to be

Repeating these small movements

My body was meant

For lifting things

And taking a walk

Jumping and running

For moving

Constantly moving

And resting at the end of the day

I donā€™t know how to stop

Because i need the money

I donā€™t know how to stop

Needing the money

I donā€™t know where to get it

That wonā€™t hurt me

If you know

You gotta tell me

My muscles are atrophying

Iā€™m gaining weight

Soon i may be unable

To lift myself from this chair

And i will die here

Sitting down

my town

When you get to my town

Park your car over there

You wonā€™t need it much

Everything is pretty close

Itā€™s laid out in a big circle

Thereā€™s a big plaza

With a fountain in the middle

Thereā€™s fields full of crops

Irrigated around the perimeter

In between is all the other stuff

The shops and restaurants

Where people share the things they made

Government buildings

Where people care about their work

They keep it all organized

Keep everyone fed and happy

Thereā€™s an electric plant

Adjoined to the water plant

They feed off each other

Thereā€™s four story buildings

And other little houses

Where people live together

And look after the children

Thereā€™s a couple schools

Where children learn all about the world

From all different people living in it

They learn about all the jobs

That real people do

And the skills they need to do them

They learn how to read and write

They make art from when theyā€™re little

Til theyā€™re old and living well

Cared for as an elder

Revered and respected

Even as they start to get cantankerous

There are trees on every street

That bear fruit in different seasons

And people pick what they need

And pick more to give to others

There are fish in the rivers

There are birds in the trees

There are dogs and pigs and sheep

There are chickens and ducks

The air is fresh and smells nice

Like someoneā€™s always baking

If you need something

There a place to go to ask

And theyā€™ll find someone to help you

Then the next time it happens

Maybe youā€™re the one who helps

Everything gets put to use

Waste is not wasted

Itā€™s as close to a closed loop

As one could hope to make

They donā€™t use more than they make

They donā€™t make much more than they need

There is an understanding of balance

Of the flowing equilibrium that exists

Between nature and the things in it

All living things have needs

And some fill the needs of others

So with everything in place

All things have their needs met

And death exists but it isnā€™t sad

Because it serves another need

Everything is cyclical

Like a spinning wheel

In my town i am mayor

I donā€™t have any power

Thatā€™s just what they call me

My job is to help

I wake up every morning

And i walk down the streets

And i just get to help

I sit down for lunch

And i ask how youā€™ve been

We discuss the weather

Then we walk along the river

You ask me all about my town

And i say it isnā€™t mine

This town belongs to anything

And everything in it

Then i wink at you

Because i wonā€™t admit it

But it is my town

I thought of it

And none of itā€™s real

pre-baked

Stare into her eyes with envy

I love the way you shape the world

I just wish i could do it like you

She says

Look around you silly

Did you think those footsteps

Were here already?

Did you think these people

Loved you already?

Did you think it all came pre-baked?

You did that you made that happen

You got here all by yourself

Youā€™re doing it already

If you could take your eyes

Off the road youā€™d see it

Somebody paved the road

And that somebody was you

hole

Iā€™d like to dig a hole

A big one

Big enough that

I canā€™t touch both sides

Not at the same time

Deep enough that just my eyes peek out

Then Iā€™m gonna chill in the hole

Drink a beer in the hole

Write my name in the hole

Count sheep in the hole

Fall asleep in the hole

Wake up in the hole

Climb out of the hole

Stand at the precipice

And start throwing stuff in

Anything thatā€™ll fit

Junk trash knickknacks

Iā€™m getting rid of it all

If it does not spark joy

It goes in the hole

Then a thin layer of dirt

Pat it down

No more hole

No hole no problem

Thatā€™s what i always say

Raven

They will cloud the skies

Big black flocks of feathers

Crying out loud over the land

Dusty and gray

Absent of its former residents

I must find the ravens

The fathers of ravens to come

I must warn them not to trust us

I must portend the coming dark

Lift my chin and call to them

Harbinger of blight and famine

Unkindness clouds these skies brother

Beware beware beware

The end is nigh

jewelry ad

Thereā€™s this ad i keep seeing

That goes something like this

Boy meets girl

/Boy/ meets girl

Boy meets boy

Boy meets girl halfway

Boy falls in love

Girl meets the one

Girl meets herself

Mom meets the one (again)

Boy likes girl

Boy loves girl

Wherever you are in your love journey

Buy diamonds from us

And Iā€™m so fixated on

How the premise of the as is like

There are all different kinds

Of relationships

And jewelry is a great way

To celebrate and commemorate them

And itā€™s like

Woke

Thereā€™s a gay couple

Thereā€™s a disabled couple

Et cetera

But there is absolutely no mention

Of lesbians

It seems like a weird oversight

Especially when they

Just say Boy meets girl

Twice in a row at the start

Do lesbians not buy jewelry?

Where in the production of this ad

Did they scrap

Girl meets girl

They said fuck it we hate ladies

I donā€™t know

Iā€™ve been watching Fargo on Hulu

And i keep getting this ad

The lesbian erasure Hulu jewelry ad

just a general update

Im working on a new project

Which has been really great

Iā€™m excited to finish and share it

Itā€™s got my creative juices flowing

And Iā€™m going to try and use this momentum

To finish a few other project Iā€™ve started

In the recent past

I donā€™t want to say what the new thing is yet

But after i finish, hopefully next week

Iā€™m going to finish the animation

I was working on before i moved

And then get to my music stuff

Itā€™s looking doubtful that Iā€™ll reach my goal

Of putting something out

In an official capacity this year

But thatā€™s okay

Iā€™ve met a lot of other goals this year

And i thought i was gonna have

Way more free time once i moved

Iā€™ve been busy and itā€™s been good

An idle mind is a scary mind

Sometimes

But Iā€™m chilling tho

Excited for this weekend

Devil smiling emoji

Flames emoji

Ttyl xoxo

the guy who invented love

The guy who invented love

Way back when

He mustā€™ve been something special

Mustā€™ve had some good people around

Maybe he had a dog or a cat

Whatever he did for work

Was probably pretty hard

Working long hours with no pay

Growing up he coulda had a lot of family

Brothers and sisters out the wazoo

Climbing up the tree in the yard

If he went to school it was a good one

He learned something important there

About himself and other people

What itā€™s like to be around

He probably had a garden

Where he grew tomatoes and stuff

He watched the vines grow up

He watered them every day

Then he plucked them off

And he made a little meal

He put it on a plate

And he served it to his family

After eating he wouldā€™ve gone out

Sat on the porch for a moment

Scratched at his head and thought of it

He wouldā€™ve invented love right then

Figured out that itā€™s amazing

To be in this world

To share with others

To feel something for them

To hold out your hand

And have it held back

To watch someone do their thing

With tears in your eyes

To fight for someone and lose

And keep fighting anyways

To think of them when theyā€™re away

To know and be known

To hold and be held

Itā€™s an awesome thing

Love

And this guy just invented it

Love lightbulb above his head

He ran around and told everyone

He told them about love

And for the rest of his life

He showed them how it worked

That guy

The guy who invented love

Well

Iā€™m glad he did it

big shoes

Bigfoot is real

The reason you donā€™t see him

When youā€™re looking in the woods

Is heā€™s hiding behind a tree

Any time you arenā€™t seeing Bigfoot

Thatā€™s because heā€™s hidden

Behind a tree

Heā€™s really good at it

What can i say

weremaid

At the rising of the moon

When the tide is at its highest

There are footprints in the sand

They start small but grow wider

Closer together and flatter

At some point it looks as if

Something has been dragged

Through the sand into the waves

Then you hear it

It starts low and pitches up

In hypnotic harmony

Calling you to the ocean

This is the howl of the weremaid

Top half wolf bottom half mermaid

They transform from normal ladies

And plunge into the sea to feast

They chew up fish and crabs

But they long for human flesh

Many a late night beach walker

Or a quiet lonesome sailer

Have fallen victim

To the siren howl of the wolf

When it gets in your ears

All you wanna do is

Stick your head underwater

So you can hear it better

And thatā€™s when they get ya

They bite your damn head off

And they chomp on the rest of you

And then the sun rises again

Thereā€™s hot bikini babes on the beach

With their bellies full

born to kill

Shits fucked

Eat breathe shit fuck

Oh man shits so fucked

Look around you man

I mean really look around

Canā€™t you see it

Everythingā€™s bleeding

Everyoneā€™s dying

The trees are screaming

As you chop them down

The pigs feel fear

Right before they die

A seed planted

Will grow just to die

Eaten by an animal

Or microbes in the soil

Arenā€™t you scared of it

Of killing or dying

Thereā€™s no other option

No other way forward

You kill and you eat

Or are killed and eaten

Nothing lasts

Everythingā€™s gone man

Itā€™s all gone

Oh god

I canā€™t handle this

I canā€™t fucking take this

I donā€™t wanna be a killer

I donā€™t want to kill

Then why am i so good at it

Why does it feel so right

To kill and to feast

To grow fat on some dead thing

Some thing that lived

All of its life and was swallowed

Destroyed and incorporated

I guess thatā€™s what Iā€™m made for

I guess Iā€™m born to kill

dog years

Your dog stands slanted in the yard

I say something i donā€™t mean (positive)

I say something i donā€™t mean (negative)

Itā€™s getting dark i try to make you laugh

The dog tips over like heā€™s made of paper

And he blows away in the wind

In the yellow light of your kitchen

Youā€™re making lost dog posters

You didnā€™t use a picture of the dog

You drew them all individually

A unique rendering on each poster

I tell you this is taking forever

But you donā€™t care itā€™s important to you

Youā€™re working on your shading

When we hear a scratch at the door

You tell me go get it youā€™re on a roll

Itā€™s your dog heā€™s wearing clothes

He went to college and is smart now

He comes in and acts like a stranger

He compliments your new rug

Then he sees the posters

He pauses and holds one in his paws

ā€œI see youā€™re still doing your drawingsā€

He drops the poster and grabs another

ā€œThis oneā€™s quite good actuallyā€

He looks at you from under his glasses

He says very calmly and directly

ā€œHow have you been my friendā€

He does not wait for you to respond

ā€œIā€™ve been quite well myself see

Iā€™m pursuing my many passions

I am growing and furthering myself

Towards goals that i have developed

In my short time away from here

And Iā€™m on pace to be right where i want

Five dog years from now

Anyways itā€™s been great catching up

But i really must be going

Some of my sophisticated friends

Have invited me to attend a gathering

And Iā€™m afraid you arenā€™t dressed for it

Good luck with all your little hobbies

Perhaps we will see each other again

If our schedules can align

You know how busy i am these days

Farewell!ā€ And he slams the door

We hear a car start outside

Bad music is playing just loud enough

That we make eye contact about it

You are quiet for a while

Then you sigh and say

ā€œWell at least we found him but

Whyā€™d he go and become some kind of

Snobbish fancy lad college boy

He used to be so cool

Pissing on grass running after balls

Shit man that sucksā€

I say yeah that sucks alright

I grab your hand and pull you

Back into the kitchen

I reach for a poster of your lost dog

In the drawing that you made

Heā€™s got a smile on his face

I put a smile on my face and i say

I really like this one

mummy

A mummy is a zombie

But older dressed in cloth

This creature of scary

Is from the underworld

Has awesome power

Breathes locusts at you

To pull you down into

The hot sand at your feet

A mummy wants to get you

Bring you over to the dead world

So you can serve him eternal

He has returned to this plane

To enslave your only soul

He has red eyes and

Though it is hidden

His skin is gray and dry

He speaks a language

Youā€™ve never heard

In a low growl

And when the sun rises

He returns to his sarcophagus

Clutching stolen souls

He closes his glowing eyes

Back to death

Until the curse stirs him

And he rises once again

grindset era

Iā€™ve entered my

Grindset era

Iā€™ve entered my

Sleep six hours

Work twelve hours

Got to bed angry era

Iā€™ve entered my

Buy produce watch it

Rot in the fridge era

Iā€™ve entered my

Stare at the fish tank era

Iā€™ve entered my

Watch two movies

At the same time era

Iā€™ve entered my

Multitasking era

Iā€™ve entered my

Burnout era

Iā€™ve entered my

Rise and grind

Wake and bake

Live and die era

gray

Forever is a long time

To make a promise for

But thatā€™s what you want

Itā€™s not what youā€™re getting

Youā€™re after it anyway

You got this version of me

Stuck in your head

That just donā€™t look like me

Thatā€™s who youā€™re after

Some guy who doesnā€™t exist

Insisting just wonā€™t change that

The gray hairs on your head

Canā€™t convince me you know better

I wish they could itā€™d be easier

To sit on your lap like a dog

Trained for you in the shape you want

Your gray hairs just mean youā€™re older

And that makes me think

You should know better

Than to think you know better than me

But Iā€™m lonely and it helps

To have someone here who wants me

Even if itā€™s not me they really want

You keep looking for your paragon

Squinting your eyes at me

And Iā€™ll keep being selfish

Until one of us considers

Maybe this isnā€™t working

mirror

deppilf pu ekoW

rorrim eht fo edis gnorW

thgir saw tfel yM

tfel saw thgir yM

llaw eht otni deklaW

neeb evā€™dluohs rood erehW

rewohs dloc a kooT

oopmahs erofeb denoitidnoC

enohp ym ta dekooL

sdrow eht daer tnā€™dluoC

won si ti tsuj sā€™taht sseuG

sdrawkcab gnihtyrevE

workshop

Build-a-bear workshop

Build the bear you want

The one you need

That answers all your questions

Fills in all your blanks

Take this skin here

And stuff it full of

All the problems you canā€™t explain

Stitch it up with faith

Blind honest faith

When you squeeze it

It says ā€œi love youā€

When you squeeze it

It says ā€œi forgive youā€

It works for what youā€™re after

A little comfort

In this world which is

Too big to explain to someone

So young and so small

And you will be young and small

For a long long long time

And if one bear doesnā€™t cut it

Come back and build another

Thereā€™s plenty of stuffing

Thereā€™s different outfits and voices

It can be whatever you want

Thatā€™s the magic of it

Thereā€™s no wrong way to do it

Squeeze your bear

It says ā€œyou are rightā€

Whatever you do

It says ā€œyou are rightā€

No matter how far you go

You can squeeze and listen

To that echo you created

ā€œYou are right you are rightā€

But thatā€™s all it will ever say

Even when youā€™re wrong

smooth

Rounded pebble

Sanded smooth by

The rivers long current

Feels good in your hand

Like you were rounded

In the water

In the opposite way

Pull back and hold it

Breathe in and out

Swing forward

Skip skip skip

Skipskipskipskip

That was a pretty good one

If you could

Youā€™d dive in

Swim to the bottom

And find that same rock

Skip it again and again

You like the routine

It is comfortable

You like being outside

It is calming

The crickets chirp

Until the sun sets

Then cicadas take their place

Little frogs on the shore

And ripples of water

They all sing with you

As you skip through the night

hot

Hot like a live wire

Running through

A heated blanket

Everybody wants

A nice heated blanket

To wrap themselves in

Feel warm after

All that time outside

Outer space is cold

Itā€™s only hot in the summer

Because the sun

Bright fiery sun shine

Beautiful and

Dangerous to look at

Straight on without blinking

Blink blink

Itā€™s still there

Bright circle shining

Starting a fire

Through the glass

Magnified at kindling

Sparking and frying

Then building itself

Pulling in more wood

As it spreads up each limb

Making it hot and red

Even sitting here

A few yards away

It spreads to me

Through the warm air

Bead of sweat on my brow

Smile closed eyes

Breathe in warm smoke

Donā€™t even cough

windy

I feel good here

The wind blows

And my hair is

Getting long enough

That i can sort of

Keep it out of my face

Enough to look around

And see myself

In the reflection

On the glass in this new place

I miss all my buddies

I cry about it but

Itā€™s not the kind of cry

That i do when i fuck up

Itā€™s just a longing and a missing

I still feel good here

Like Iā€™m growing into

A really big shirt

Life is slow sometimes

And then itā€™s not

You canā€™t hold onto time

You have to move through it

And Iā€™m moving

Pushed along by

The soft nudge of the wind

There are other people

Walking here too

Alone and together

All moving through it

I feel full of love

For all of us

And Iā€™m learning

To include myself in that

Itā€™s nice

A little chilly

I zip up my jacket

I smile more now

When Iā€™m out

With nowhere to be

I always liked wandering

And here it feels

Like thatā€™s what

Iā€™m meant to do

Iā€™m doing my best

And it means something

That i feel like

My best has gotten better

Than the last time i checked

horror

Scary movies

Are not so scary

Full of blood and guts

Demons from hell

Strange gore

Monsters and

Beasts of men

It does not unsettle me

Whether itā€™s real or not

Creeping or crawling

Familiar or foreign

I know fear

I know horror

Itā€™s not a spooky ghoul

How i wish it was

Evil in the heart of man

Gleeful cruelty

Right out in the open

No dark lurking shape

Hands under the bed

The real horror is so scary

Youā€™re not supposed to admit

That it scares you all the time

dog

Dress for the dog you want

Dance like no dogs watching

You get the dog you deserve

You can lead a dog to water

But you canā€™t make im bark

Apple a day keeps the dog away

In dog beers Iā€™ve only had one

In dog beers Iā€™ve only had two

In dog beers Iā€™ve only had three

In dog beers Iā€™ve only had seven

In dog ears Iā€™m a high pitched squeak

In dog years Iā€™m older than you

In dog years Iā€™m one sixty two

In dog fears Iā€™m a dark moving shape

In dog tears Iā€™m wet on your face

A dog hears everything you say

A dog sees you naked

But wonā€™t look away

A dog is always naked

Unless you count the necklace

But itā€™s not an accessory

Itā€™s more of a shackle

Doggy raising his hackles

Hair of the dog that bit you

Bite him back

Then heā€™ll bite you

To get some of your hair

Then youā€™ll bite him

To get some of his hair

Itā€™s a dog eat dog world

Itā€™s a doggy dog world

Itā€™s like doggy chase squirrel

Dog is god spelled backwards

If you put god in a mirror

He would say arf arf arf

That would be weird

new baby

When you got born

When you came in

From the ether or the void

The door closed behind you

The only way out is in

Further into consciousness

Even death will not spare you

If you die before your time

You become a ghost

You must wander translucent

Still thinking still conscious

Aware of it all

Waiting out the clock until

You are admitted to afterlife

Heaven and hell are the same place

Where you arenā€™t anymore

They pick you apart

Assembly line angels

And boil all the pieces

Stretch them out and dye them

Stitch a bunch of parts together

And send them back to the world

As new baby poor baby

First time last time in the world