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Writing Textfiles
ver. 1.0
by Burnin' of UNKNOWN Prez
December 3, 2000
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Introduction
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When surfing through the files which The Collector downloaded from
Textfiles.Com I stumbled onto one called "The Art Of Writing Textfiles"
which was written by The Bronze Rider. It's a nice article which caused
several thoughts in my head. So I thought why not write my own file about
writing textfiles.
PS! The following is partly based on Bronze Rider's work, so greets to him
(where ever he might be)
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Why people write textfiles
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The main reasons why someone would consider writing a textfile are the
following: a) he or she has something to say; b) the person likes writing.
Often both reasons play a role (combined with the wish to have a big audience
(who has read all kind of s*** and who's criticizing won't destroy the authors
(possible) career) and the possibility to stay (somewhat) anonymous and also
because the writer hates hand writing).
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What do you need
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So, dear dude or dudess who you are reading this, in case you are thinking
about writing your own textfile, you need a few things first.
You need a computer. Doesn't have to be your own but you must have the
permission to work with it for a couple of hours (or how long you estimate
the writing will take)
You also need a text editor. And when I say 'text editor' then I mean a
TEXT EDITOR and not a WORD PROCESSOR or DESKTOP PUBLISHING PROGRAM. There
are a few cases where you actually will need the possibilities of a word
processor (such as WinWord) but this is not one of them. If you really
can't imagine yourself working with something as trivial as Notepad then go
ahead and use your heavy weight favorite, but only if it can save in PURE
text format (I've yet to see one which can't but who knows). So don't even
think about horror-formats like PDF which is only good if the printout has
to have exactly the same color as on the monitor. Currently the colors don't
matter so forget it.
One thing you mustn't forget is the subject. It can be what ever you can think
of and you don't have to actually know anything about it, but you can't write
a textfile if you have no subject.
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So, you have everything
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Then sit down and start with the writing. There's nothing more to say. It's
exactly as writing an essay in school. Of course, there are a few advantages:
a) you can spend as much (or as little) time on it as YOU want (that ain't
absolutely true if you're using someone else's computer); b) you don't have
to worry that the teacher might not like your thoughts; c) your creation
doesn't have to make sense nor follow any rules (although I suggest that you
follow those that you find below); d) you can write about anything/anyone
you want/like. Don't forget: you're not forced to anything, YOU're the one
who wants to write (and not some perverted teacher). Text files are one of
those rare occasions when you can say out everything that's on your mind or
in your heart and it's going to be published. If nobody agrees to include
your creation on his/her page then get an account on one of the free web-space
providers and put the work up there.
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Hints about the writing
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Your lines shouldn't exceed 79 characters. Better viewers have line wrap
but that ain't the same. If you are too lazy to manually fix the line size
then use an editor which has line wrapping.
Check your creation with a speller. That especially goes if the language
you're writing in ain't your native or you didn't get an 'A' (or 1 or 5,
depending on your country) in it when you were in school.
Don't forget that spellers can't replace a human so re-check the writing
for mistakes
Don't use too much slang. A small amount is OK but try to keep the amount low.
You don't have to stretch out what you're saying. There's no 'has to be
at least 2 pages long' demand so make it short but clear
Try to not overdo with ASCII art unless it's a manual which really needs
pictures
Use what you were taught about writing in school. Of course, no one expects
you to include an index and 'used materials' but try to format your text a
little bit. Separate the text into chapters for example
If possible then include your e-mail address. I'm sure you would like to get
feedback
Forget disclaimers which say "you can't hold the author responsible". Actually
forget also any other disclaimer. The only lines that are worth including
are "copyright by" and "don't do this at home". "Why so?" you might now ask.
First reason: nobody actually reads the disclaimers so it's a waste of time
and space. Second reason: everything has been said before and your writing
is only information, like in books, so nobody will sue you for saying what
you said. The only stuff that's so hot that "it's not my fault" text would
be useful is NSA or Pentagon secrets. And those agencies don't care about
any disclaimers. Third reason: in case that you actually go under court, the
disclaimers are meaningless. It's like you would kill somebody and then
declare that YOU can't be held responsible.
Don't put the file out right away, wait a couple of days. In that time
re-read everything. Sometimes you find that something can be said better
or you have a couple new ideas which to include.
Let a friend read your article. Maybe he/she points out something obvious
you've forgotten but would like to say
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Conclusion
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Text files are GOOD things, which provide total freedom. Have fun writing
them.