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THE REAL PIRATES GUIDE VOLUME V WRITTEN BY RABID RASTA AND CTRL RESET --------------------------------------- [-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-] [-] [-] [-] A HIGH SOCIETY [-] [-] PRODUCTION [-] [-] [-] [-] [-] [-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-][-] --------------------------------------- THIS VERSION IS GOING TO BE SHORT AND SWEET ... REAL PIRATES ASK PERMISSION BEFORE WRITING A SEQUEL TO A TEXT FILE. CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES UNDERSTAND THAT IF SOMEONE WRITES A FILE IT DOESN'T GIVE OTHERS THE RIGHT TO CONTINUE IT. REAL PIRATES AREN'T NAMED THE WHIP OR RUN AN AE WITH A PASSWORD DHARMA. CORROLARY :IF A REAL PIRATE RAN AN AE WITH THE PASSWORD DHARMA HE WOULDN'T ADMIT IT. REAL PIRATES UNDERSTAND THAT IF A PERSON DOESN'T HAVE A CAT, HE ISN'T NECESSARILY A LOSER. CORROLARY : JUST BECAUSE THE EQUIPMENT ISN'T AS GOOD DOESN'T MEAN THE PERSON IS A TOTAL LOOZE. CORROLARY TO CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES PLAN TO SELL THEIR MICROMODEMS TO GET CATS. REAL PIRATES UNDERSTAND THAT THE GAME POPEYE WAS SOMEONES IDEA OF A JOKE. CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES KNOW THAT THE ONLY PERSON WHO THOUGHT IT WAS GOOD ENOUGH TO DISTRIBUTE WAS DEFINATELY A LOSER. [MISC.] REAL PIRATES DONT LISTEN TO FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD. CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES WISH THAT FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD WOULD STAY THERE INDEFINATELY. REAL PIRATES THINK THAT NAMING AN ELITE BOARD OF WHICH THE SYSOP IS NAMED FRANKIE "RELACS ///" IS THE DUMBEST THING THEY HAVE EVER HEARD REAL PIRATES DO NOT LISTEN TO NU WAVE, MOD, OR ANY OTHER TYPE OF FAGGIT MUSIC, AND AVOID IT AT ALL COSTS. CORROLARY: REAL PIRATES ARE NOT FAGS. REAL PIRATES CAN SPOT A NETWORKS BBS 5 MILES AWAY AND WILL AVOID AT ALL COSTS EXCEPT MAYBE TO CRASH IT. REAL PIRATES ARE NOT NAMED : FISH MAN, THE KEY, APPLE ADDICT, REDD SLAVER, MERCURY MERCINARY, FRANKIE GOES TO HOLLYWOOD OR THE LUMBERJACK. REAL PIRATES ARE ON SPEC-ELITE AND DONT CARE IF NOBODY PUBLICIZES THE NUMBER ON THE CRACKS. CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES WHO CRACK UNDERSTAND THAT TO GIVE THE NUMBER 213-YOU-FOOL DOESN'T DO ANYONE ANY GOOD AT ALL. CORROLARY TO CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES DONT QUOTE FRANKIE ON CRACKS. REAL PIRATES KNOW WOPR ISN'T A HAMBURGER. CORROLARY : REAL PIRATES DONT POST WOPR AFTER THEIR NAMES BECAUSE THE ONLY PEOPLE WHO CARE ARE LOSERS WHO AREN'T ON IT. CORROLARY TO CORROLARY : ONLY TOTAL LOSERS POST THE NUMBER TO WOPR AFTER THEIR NAME SINCE IT HAS BEEN DOWN FOR MORE THAN A MONTH. CORROLARY: ONLY SUPER LOOZES LIKE THE DATA LEECH (LOOZE) WOULD POST THEIR NAME AFTER IT, BECAUSE IT IS THE ONLY THING HE HAS GOING FOR HIM. WELL THAT CONCLUDES THIS GUIDE.. BE WATCHING FOR A REAL PIRATES GUIDE VI.. HOPEFULLY WRITTEN BY ME . --------------------------------------- <C> 1985 UBANGI PUBLISHING-RABID RASTA INC. ---------------------------------------