💾 Archived View for freeshell.de › stories › bribekarts.gmi captured on 2023-11-14 at 08:26:41. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
⬅️ Previous capture (2022-03-01)
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Back when the internet wasn't a thing, I worked on software that was sent to users on floppy disks. The disks were produced and sent out by another company. To "encourage" us to continue to use them, they invited us every year to a go-kart race. Surely it was a bribe, but I didn't mind because I had no influence over who we used.
I like driving karts. It seems crazy fast because your arse is an inch off the ground. But you know it's not really that fast, so you can't get hurt, right? Well, I have another story about that... but even at the bribe races, one of my colleages crashed, the petrol cap came off and he was covered in fuel. I didn't see it happen, but he said that he knew it was bad because suddenly he was surrounded by marshalls pointing fire extinguishers at him. The petrol didn't ignite, but it did stink. He took off his overalls and refused to continue. I thought "Great, more time in the kart for me!"
The format was endurance racing. We had a team of thee or four and took turns in the kart. After a couple of hours, the team with the most laps wins. There were a lot of beginners who were pretty slow. I enjoyed catching the kart in front and working my way past, and I was a bit disappointed every time I got the signal that it was time to swap drivers.
While one colleague was driving, I said to another that the only place you could easily pass the slower karts was at the end of the straight. He gave me a look and said he didn't know, he hadn't passed anyone. So that explained why we weren't higher up the leader board.
One team were obviously regulars because they brought their own team overalls. They passed me a couple of times. Grr! Towards the end one of them was close behind me and trying to pass. He's not getting by me!
Concentrate on a good speed on the straight, block the inside of the next bend, and the rest of the track is too twisty. But at one point in the twists he got a good run at me and tried to go round the outside. We go down a short straight side by side, and I know I'm ok because I have the inside for the next turn and I can push him wide. But he tries to take the bend as if I'm not there. But I *am* there. He shoves me into the track side barrier, my kart goes into his front wheel and pushes it beyond where it will turn back. We sit there, jammed together.
Marshalls heave at us and try to wrench his wheel back where it should be. It doesn't move. Neither of us are going anywhere. As the marshalls struggle, I notice karts lap us for the second, then third time. Eventually we are freed, but there's only a few minutes until it's all over. His team came second by two laps. The time he lost by driving into me cost him the win. That's so satisfying that I feel like I've won and I go home happy. In fact we were only just in the top half.