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SCP-6987 — Your Legally Entitled Coverage As An Employee of the SCP Foundation (Provided by Goldbaker-Reinz Ltd.)

by LORDXVNV, from the SCP Wiki. Source: https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-6987. Licensed under CC-BY-SA.

Joint Internal Memo: SCP-6987
To the O5 Council,
We have completed this year’s revisions of SCP-6987 documentation for Clearance Levels 1 through 4, pending your review. Please make any necessary changes.
We are trying something a little different this year for Level 1 documentation. Hopefully, this should emphasize to the new recruits that insurance coverage from Goldbaker is significantly different from what they are used to.
Ezekiel Yang, PhD.
Department of Financial Esoterica
Sheldon Katz, Esq.
Legal Department.
Secure. Contain. Protect.

NOTICE FROM THE RECORDS AND INFORMATION SECURITY ADMINISTRATION

By accepting employment with the Foundation, you are acknowledging that you have read and are aware of the following information in its entirety, and that you affirm that you will adhere to the containment procedures.

Item #: SCP-6987

Containment Class: Safe

Secondary Class: Radix

Disruption Class: Dark

Risk Class: Notice

Special Containment Procedures

All terms and conditions present within SCP-6987 must be upheld by Foundation personnel. If the Foundation is found to be in violation of a term outlined within SCP-6987, compliance must be restored before the end of the next Gregorian calendar month or else suffer a penalty as defined in SCP-6987-0 through SCP-6987-[REDACTED BY LEGAL DEPARTMENT].

As a Radix-class anomaly, SCP-6987 has been incorporated into the Foundation’s command structure[1]. If you believe you are aware of a violation of SCP-6987, please report said violation through Human Resources, your site’s Foundation Legal Department Liaison, or SCiPNET’s anonymous reporting function. Whistleblowers will be protected under the Foundation’s “Stand Up and Speak Up” policy.

Violations of SCP-6987 not only expose the Foundation to significant financial, legal, and reputational risks but also threaten the continued existence of humanity itself.

Description

SCP-6987 is the portfolio of insurance contracts between the SCP Foundation (“the Foundation”, or the “insured”) and Goldbaker-Reinz Insurance Group Ltd. (“Goldbaker-Reinz”, or the “Provider”). Several of these contracts have anomalous enforcement clauses or benefit payments.

As an employee of the SCP Foundation, you are entitled to insurance coverage through Goldbaker-Reinz. You may choose to exempt yourself from any or all of this coverage and seek private insurance plans, if you so choose. However, note that the coverage offered by Goldbaker-Reinz provides timely global availability and a range of experimental medical procedures.

By accepting employment with the Foundation, you are acknowledging that you have read and are aware of the following information, to your clearance level, in its entirety.

Welcome to the Foundation!

Hello and welcome! We’re so glad you decided to join us here at the SCP Foundation.

At the SCP Foundation, our trusted insurance provider of choice is Goldbaker-Reinz. They’re the most influential and most reliable insurer behind the Veil, yet almost completely unknown in the mundane world. They have proven themselves trustworthy time and time again in our sustained relationship dating back over 200 years.

Goldbaker-Reinz is uniquely equipped to help with the sorts of challenges the Foundation faces every day. As a full voting member of the GOC’s Council of 108, they’re very familiar with the anomalous, but they’re contractually bound to remain nonpartisan in intergroup contracts. Goldbaker-Reinz is proud to service the SCP Foundation, nearly all GOC affiliates, the Horizon Initiative, and many more.

They are the only insurer with a proven record when it comes to anomalous, esoteric, and extremely rare world-changing “black swan” events. They’ve got a most-likely anomalous model for forecasting the probability and impact of these kinds of events, which of course is proprietary. Rest assured, though — our best and our brightest have pored over every contract we’ve had with them and every payout in every year, and we can trust them to adhere to our contracts to the letter.

And of course, Goldbaker-Reinz will aid you in your mundane insurance needs as well.

We’re so happy you decided to join our Foundation family, and we hope your career is a long and fruitful one.

Ezekiel Yang, PhD.

Department of Financial Esoterica

Sheldon Katz, Esq.

Legal Department.

Secure. Contain. Protect.

[DELETE THIS MESSAGE BEFORE PUBLICATION: We borrowed much of this verbiage from a GR marketing doc. We can tone it down if we need to, but as stated earlier this is a sales document for new joiners. We all know they can be a little leery when it comes to working with obviously anomalous entities.]

A History of Goldbaker-Reinz

circa 2600 BCE

References to “Nebu-Wosir” (Gold-Osiris), a figure purportedly responsible for ameliorating effects of famine should the Nile fail to flood or flood overly aggressively, in recovered Egyptian Old Kingdom texts.

500 BCE – 300 AD

References to “Soter Aurarius” (Goldsaver) appear in Roman literature. Figure is said to have aided in the rebuilding of Rome after the Great Fire.

circa 600 A.D.

First references to the “Balancer of Londinium”. Depictions vary from a benevolent trickster god to a very lucky gambler to an investor in several ventures viewed as foolhardy by the masses but ultimately profitable.

1200s–1700s

Goldbaker (later Ltd.) enters early contracts with Foundation precursors, including the American Secure Containment Initiative and Her Majesty’s Foundation for the Secure Containment of the Paranormal. It is believed Goldbaker is an assumed name, chosen for nomenclative camouflage.

1300s–Late 1800s

Goldbaker Ltd. proves instrumental in providing relief and recovery in the aftermath of the Fourth, Fifth, and Sixth Occult Wars.

1690s

“Goldbaker” is among the first insurers to become established at Lloyd’s of London. They (singular) are instrumental in the early prominence of the organization and serve on the committee of The Society of Lloyd’s for decades.

1871

“Goldbaker” publicly rejects the Lloyd’s Act, declaring their intent to continue acting as an independent insurer. They move primarily to providing services behind the Veil, rebranding as Goldbaker Ltd. Their involvement with Lloyd’s of London is scrubbed from the historical record by HMFSCP.

Late 1800s

The modern Foundation forms. Goldbaker Ltd. declines a full merger, citing conflicts of interest and independence concerns. Contracts held by precursor organizations are renegotiated into comprehensive coverage agreement, designated SCP-6987 due to inherited anomalous enforcement clauses.

1945

In the aftermath of the Seventh Occult War, Goldbaker Ltd. again proves instrumental in funding rebuilding efforts. It is a founding member of the Council of 108 of the newly formed Global Occult Coalition. The Foundation considers cancelling SCP-6987, but both parties come to a mutual agreement and amend their contracts to include a neutrality clause in any future Foundation-GOC conflicts.

1974

Werner Reinz founds Reinz Group, which quickly rises in the anomalous financial industry. The Foundation informs government regulators, and begins its own investigations.

1981

Goldbaker Ltd. and Reinz Group merge to form Goldbaker-Reinz Insurance Group Ltd.

Foundation investigations of Reinz Group are folded into the Goldbaker Foundation Audit Task Force.

Your Benefits and Responsibilities With Regards to Goldbaker-Reinz

The following information is relevant to you (henceforth also referred to as a “covered person”) as both a member of the Foundation and a benefactor of Goldbaker-Reinz’s insurance policies. For brevity, these clauses are those you are unlikely to have seen with previous employers, unless said employers were likewise serviced by Goldbaker-Reinz.

SCP-6987-0 is the Master Services Agreement describing the scope of services provided to the insured. SCP-6987-0 governs terms for extending the coverage provided by Goldbaker-Reinz, modifying terms of existing contracts, and other legal and business necessities.

The Legal Department and Department of Financial Esoterica have determined that the following clauses of SCP-6987-0 are mission-critical at your clearance level.

All other subitems of SCP-6987 are specific coverage policies. The following overview covers the insurance policies available at your level with major deviations from insurance policies you are most likely to have already seen.

A comprehensive overview of all available coverage can be accessed through the SCiPNET Resource Portal.

Benefits

SCP-6987-1-3: Healthcare, Dental, and Vision

Goldbaker-Reinz offers comprehensive healthcare plans for all covered persons regardless of nationality.

Coverage explicitly includes:

SCP-6987-4: Pet Insurance

You may elect to use SCP-6987-4 as your primary healthcare plan should your primary consciousness be housed within a non-humanoid animal over the course of your employment with the Foundation.

This policy may be extended to magical familiars, if applicable.

SCP-6987-5-9: Vehicular

This policy includes personal aircraft, watercraft, and magical steeds not classified as familiars.

SCP-6987-16: Life

Coverage only applies to duplicated individuals if said individuals have contributed at least one (1) payment to the plan.

Individuals cannot be beneficiaries of their own life insurance policies.

Goldbaker-Reinz reserves the right to audit all life insurance claims for fraud.

Legalities

SCP-6987-0 Clause 3: Intellectual Property

The Provider and the insured are forbidden from attempting to investigate, steal, pilfer, copy, or plagiarize any intellectual property or property.

Non-exhaustive examples include containment procedures, memetic content, risk models, confidential anomalous inventories, and cash reserves. (A more comprehensive list is provided in clause 3.1.2).

SCP-6987-0.8: Duplication of Covered Persons

If in the course of your work you find yourself with a duplicate with no distinguishing factors between duplicate and original, both of you shall be covered under all applicable policies.

Coverage details may vary for differing kinds of duplication (e.g. temporal, biological, digital, etc.).

SCP-6987-0.13: Coverage in Alternate Dimensions or Timelines

Like the Foundation, Goldbaker-Reinz exists across multiple timelines.

So long as an iteration of Goldbaker-Reinz exists, your policies will be honored.

SCP-6987-0.85: Pataphysical Protection

Goldbaker-Reinz cannot guarantee protection against pataphysical events.

Note: Clauses 616 and 617 of SCP-6987-0

As a member of the SCP Foundation with limited decision-making abilities, your coverage is unlikely to be affected by penalties outlined in Clause 617. However, it is important that you understand how SCP-6987 differs from mundane insurance contracts.

Goldbaker-Reinz and the Foundation understand that while both entities provide an indispensable service to the other, due diligence is a matter of practical business considerations.

As such, both entities employ anomalous means of ensuring compliance with contractual terms, or, in cases in which such enforcement is not possible, suitable penalties.

Clause 616: Enforcement

The acceptable methods by which the contractual terms of any subcontracts of SCP-6987 can be enforced, by either the Foundation or Goldbaker-Reinz, include:

Clause 617: Acceptable Penalties for Contractual Breaches

We hope this primer has gotten you used to the fascinating, abnormal world behind the Veil.

It’s not so different back here.

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Footnotes