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The article that inspired me to attempt to do a Depth Year
An online friend of mine did a Depth Year in 2022. He documented both his successes and failures each month, and ultimately felt rewarded but exhausted after his pursuits. I thought that fulfillment and exhaustion that comes with a year-long project was something that I desperately needed, and so I embarked upon my Depth Year on January 2023, with the intention of deepening my understanding of habit and my relationship with my hobbies and studies.
Up until April, I wrote up entries on my journal at the end of each month checking in on my progress in each of the questions that I wanted to focus on, and while there were areas I consistently neglected (my preparation for an exam that's happening in a week at the time of writing this) it at least helped me identify them and prompted the question of why I was so reticent to focus on them as opposed to other interests or activities.
I went on a roadtrip with my family and partner in April and didn't have the time to write down the monthly check-in and after that, I just didn't do it again.
I think habits, or rather the ability to build them, is a muscle that I don't use enough. If I miss a day, I struggle with the idea of picking the routine back up again even though it's even more counterproductive to feel conflicted for months and do nothing than miss a day and keep going.
Since april, I've been feeling miserable about having failed to keep up with the Depth Year project, even though nothing was stopping me from just sitting down, journaling about my progress, and picking the routines to deepen my understanding of the chosen topics back up.
I think that now that the schoolyear's starting, I should try to prime myself for another go at this, since the feeling of newness does help me overcome the dread of abandoned projects. I think my efforts would be better spent strengthening the habit to build habits for now, because I can't really build a routine around any specific interest if a routine is impossible to keep up at all.
I want to start easy, and track the basic self-care tasks that I struggle with due to executive dysfunction and other mental health issues: General hygiene and keeping my living space clean. For now, the challenge is not to give up on the routine. If I manage to bounce back from a missed day for the next month, then I will consider it a success.