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09282023. good morning flounder

learned how to make a paper crane yesterday and now i can't stop

think i might be going through something

get of work at 1

go home eat last amy's meal

nap

by then i guess it will be about 3pm

my next obligation will be at 5:30 so i have some time for an activity

i think gym or laundry

class ends at 6:20, author talk is at 7. how far is the venue from my apartment? about 15 minutes so that should be fine. just need to be ready to go immediately after logging off

should be home from author talk by 9. then it will be time to submit tonight's assignment. then i will go to bed

reminder to myself to spend some time with chat gpt to devise a daily routine and meal plan and budget because i cannot currently be trusted to manage my life

just made the tiniest paper crane of my career. out of a sticky note

09272023. good morning flounder

i described what happened last night to a few coworkers and public opinion seems to be that the incident constitutes harassment. not sure what to do about that, i wouldn't feel good about putting it on admin/security's radar. even though this is the second time he's done something like this

alioop! i went to an open mic at this cozy bar / cafe that i like. the open mic is pretty new and the only weekly one in town. it felt less like an open mic and more like one group of friends putting on a showcase for themselves. the slots were 20 minutes which i thought was insane

how is the slaughter beach, dog album? the title caught my eye because i love the labi siffre album crying laughing loving lying

off brain day

09262023. hello flounder

that post open mic hangxiety is just how i remember it

i chose option 1 and it was wack! lesson learned

feeling a little twisted up

men are being insane

fun story from just now

[] spots me in one of the offices, lets himself in (i work in a public building), takes a seat across from me, opens with: so what am i missing? i fucked up and now it's over?

one hour 15 minutes and i'm home

09252023. good morning flounder

had a really good day yesterday with N and S. for lunch we took N to [new cafe S and i have been really wanting to try]. the space was so delightful, and the food so delicious i felt like a kid. N liked it so much he asked to go back for dinner. we did and he ordered the same thing he got for lunch. amazing

at one point S said something scathing and N said wow...no bones. i realized he was trying to communicate the sentiment "ate and left no crumbs" but for some reason just decided to say "no bones." amazing

anyways, N will be on his way to [new city 1000 miles away] soon, it feels like the end of an era because S, N and i have never been too far from each other. reminder to myself to pick a book for our new long-distance book club. S asked for light-hearted

have been seeking out ballet fiction for some reason. read astonish me maggie shipstead and now reading they're going to love you meg howrey. i think i like how ballerina characters tend to be intense and crazy and only care about ballet. usually i read confused characters who don't know what they want

clog girl fall

library girl fall

single girl fall

bob girl fall. jk i didn't do this yet. maybe i will

no frozen meal girl fall. something to aspire to

today learned that at some point i cataloged an extremely inaccurate definition of the word IRREVERENT in my brain even though the meaning of the word is completely clear and intuitive. not sure how this happened! i think i was pulling from EFFERVESCENT omg facepalm

i have two choices for my evening. one is have fun one is do the thing i should do. hm. important to consider that i might not actually have fun at option 1 (though it would at least allow some release of tension), and also that choosing to do the thing i should do might not actually mean completing it. to which you might say, well wouldn't it be good just to make some progress on the thing? a good point but meaningless to the binary thinking i am applying to the situation

i keep wanting to talk to [coworker x] about [situation with coworker y] because i know she has some context already and because i know she would care. which is usually more than enough impetus for me to tell someone something. but every time i get the chance to share i end up keeping [situation] to myself. idk where that boundary is coming from. guilt/shame about [situation]? being protective of my privacy? subconscious distrust of [coworker x]? unwillingness to associate myself with [coworker y]?

i think [situation] makes me hyperaware of my somewhat precarious position at [job]. like i don't need to give anyone a reason to see me as an unprofessional or unserious person, because they may already feel that way by virtue of my age and other identities. but maybe i care too much

[coworker unrelated to x or y] is doing his thing again (reading the entire issue of the daily paper cover to cover, while standing). i wonder if he's gotten to my piece yet. last time he just said "i read your piece" with no evaluation. i respect him so much

apparently the $16 clogs i got at goodwill yesterday are a $130 pair of danskos

unfortunately this day has passed by without my participation but i suppose i was in attendance. stay tuned for my 5-9 after my 9-5

sometimes it seems unthinkable that [] could still have any interest in me considering how little interest i show and then i remember the insane feelings i had for [college best friend's roommate] and we would only interact for like four minutes at a time when he came downstairs to get cereal or something. over the course of two years he asked me to hang out one time, it was when i was really depressed (i think he knew this because i was always at the house being depressed), he brought me with him to catch and mark tiny garter snakes with nail polish to track the progression of a disease or something. it was for one of his classes. to this day i do not know why he invited me. anyways he's married now. the first time i met him: walked the 20 minutes to [best friend's house] holding an overflowing laundry hamper up on my head (the machine at my new place wasn't working). the door was unlocked, i walked in sweaty and burdened and they were all in the living room watching atlanta season 1. he was the cutest thing i had ever seen!!!

09232023. good morning flounder

there is no coffee in this apartment

there is

maybe i will make a london fog

or maybe i will go out for coffee

journal article titles that go hard:

Concealing White Supremacy through Fantasies of the Library: Economies of Affect at Work.
The Legacy of Lady Bountiful: White Women in the Library

09222023. good morning flounder.

good morning alioop. not weird or overstepping at all, though i understand the concern -- flounder correspondence can feel strange. anyways thank you for saying that about my mom and the duck. it makes me happy that my unsent text could be received and understood by someone. thank you for bearing witness

good to hear the anxiety from that meeting hasn't lingered. i hope next week is easier!

trying to get everything done before [dear friend] visits on sunday. really looking forward to this

three people at work have gotten covid in the past week

oh no already losing momentum ok back to work

so cool of james blake to release a smoothbrain album during a season in which i must do so much smoothbrain work. profound feeling of harmony just now reading a research study listening to "night sky" i barely registered it it was just coating my brain

it's too dark for my eyes in here even with the lamp and the ceiling light on. note to self get another light

update i appropriated the lamp from the kitchen counter. it looks silly next to my existing desk lamp but it is a huge help

09212023. good morning flounder

having a good day but extremely distracted!!!

bad voice day, worst one in a little while, i think because i've been staying up so late. it's ok i just compensate for the breaks with volume and eye contact

was recently kind of cruel and i realize it's because i was triggered. A says i would be a good therapy patient because there's no suicide risk but there's lots of problems

to alioop i would say personally i have always appreciated it when people poke fun at their dorkiness even when it felt a little dissonant to my mood or the situation. and in general i think it's just better to over-express than to under-express. the risk of over-expression is embarrassment and the risk of under-expression is ... idk but i think it's something worse! especially over time

my temporary newspaper gig is up. that was fun :(

insane text from former coworker at [newspaper] yesterday about how he tore his MCL while covering a high school football game. he got run over by a quarter back or something. sounds bad and they're not giving him workers' comp

it's been almost two years since i left that job! sometimes i miss my moments with that coworker. staying late in the newsroom walking to jimmy johns for fuel before heading out to our evening assignments (sports games for him, the tiniest most ridiculous government meetings for me)

sometimes i miss who i was at the paper, the job required me to be louder and more opinionated and in general more resilient than my current one does. when i told former coworker that i've been struggling lately he was encouraging and said i was "strong as hell" which is not how anyone would really describe me i think. but it makes sense that he would because he saw me do a lot of hard / frustrating things

we can compare that to how my current coworkers describe me. today one told me i remind him of bobbi althoff that white girl who interviews celebrities and instead of having a point of view or a personality she is just awkward and inexpressive with a lot of vocal fry and that's the bit i guess

submitted my first paper of grad school. the cool thing about this type of writing / work is that i can listen to music while i do it whereas i need quiet for creative writing. while writing this paper i played through james blake - the colour in anything a few times, also frank ocean blonde and jodi - blue heron <3 and most of tobi lou's discography

thinking a lot about [] which is silly but not dangerous yet

this month i ate at least one frozen meal every day. when i cooked it was eggs or rice. i never exercised more than once a week and skipped most breakfasts. here are the amy's meals i ate most frequently:

also a lot of grocery store sushi

i'm not upset with myself for this ^ it was a hard month and i had to lower my standards for self-maintenance to have time and energy for everything. but i'm going to try and phase out the amy's in october because it is actually not cost-effective at all

i love the usher tiny desk

09202023. good morning flounder

carrying so much anger that i think it is temporarily altering my personality

[coworker] should be ashamed of himself and it amazes me that he's not

[long-term long-distance crush] shows very little care in how he communicates with me and it amazes me that i still try. stop!

[] just now: i have a present for you [hands me a pristine copy of the official guide to APA style 7th edition] <3

spent some time with ross gay "inciting joy" last night. my favorite part was the preface where he explains why he wrote the book / makes his argument for the importance of writing about joy. when the actual writing started i grew disinterested. his storytelling is kind of exhausting to me. i like listening to him talk though

there was a description i liked of his mother's laughter. he called her a "leaking sack of delight"

09192023. hello flounder

day 19

things to look forward to in october

09182023. good morning flounder

at work somehow

happy day 18 of the september challenge. congratulations everyone on making it this far. 12 more days and then it will be october which i decided will be better

[] shaved his head again, crazy that i've been working here long enough to have seen his naked scalp twice

there are two interpersonal dramas in my life right now and the easier one to explain is that a coworker confessed feelings and then nullified them in a single (long) conversation. if i had to summarize his main argument it was like: i like you and that's why i've been flirting but i started doing that while i was going through a rough patch with [GIRLFRIEND] and we're working on things again so i can't pursue things with you but just know that i fucks with you

men

extremely cool of [professor] to push a big deadline back a week. this is huge for the september challenge

today i confirmed that [] is []. he was always cagey about sharing and honestly he should've been cagier!!! i wish i'd never found this! if i were him i would never even mention it because what the fuck

not the theory i was hoping to prove but in some ways a crazier one. oh well

feel bad i spent my weekend at home being distracted and angry. []'s fault for leaving me the burden of sorting through this pile of shit

09172023. could not even begin to explain

hahahaha

there are three crazy people in this story that’s all i know

four if we count the alter ego

09162023. good morning flounder

beautiful rainy day

also "game day"

chaos!!!

not inside me though

inside i am calm

no traffic

was out with K for several hours. learned a lot

excruciatingly close to proving my theory

home again

maxed out on brain activity again

several hours later

gathered some brainpower to reflect on my conversation with K

never mind i actually don't think it's necessary

on my mind though!

09152023. hello flounder

made it to the library but today as a patron. black iced coffee sip sip

saw bottoms with S yesterday i think we both laughed a little too hard because we are repressed

woke up with sudden acne, my face is a mystery to me

if nothing else grad school will teach me how to focus on things for long periods of time and cope with extreme frustration

since school started i've had to take in a lot of bad writing in the form of research papers and discussion posts. i used to go into research papers assuming the writing would be clear and logical but i've read the papers my dad writes so i know that some researchers do not really care about finessing their language. which is fine it is interesting practice for me. but i feel a need to balance my intake by reading more good writing. but i do not have time for all of that reading

09142023. good morning flounder

something theatrical and passive aggressive happened yesterday at work

i think i am going to react by being really nice

because i don't think this person has the capacity to engage with me about this in a way that would satisfy me

and i don't care enough about my relationship with them to try and be real with them

anyways

just realized i like iced coffee black. sip sip

had a good conversation with A last night

we talked about the specific speech act of asking someone to repeat themselves

with my voice being the way it is i am on the receiving end of this speech act frequently

things i've noticed

one time i watched a coworker speak to someone that they couldn't understand. without saying a word or adjusting in any way, she just raised her eyebrows and cupped her ear with her hand. this blew my mind. i would accept this from a family member/close friend, or from an employee. from anyone in between i think would be troubling

09132023. hello flounder

doing the impossible

(having a good day)

evilswampmonster i hope you enjoy meshuggah :) i've had some cozy mornings there

finally i can flounder

submitted article, tried to give it weight that it couldn't carry, oh well

overestimated myself (rare)

by bringing my school stuff to work

no way i'm logging into a zoom meeting without taking off my bra and shoes

don't know why i've been so allergic to doing work at home lately

but i've kind of been allergic to doing anything at home

seeing S tomorrow and big sib this weekend i must remember this. persist!

09122023. good morning flounder

got eight hours of sleep for the first time in maybe a week

and woke up with enough time to make breakfast!

A dropped a pancake on the floor on his way out. i did not witness but heard him say, "pancake on the floor!"

today i will

music artists that resonate with my emotional frequency lately

also drake but i didn't want to say that

I SHOULD BE DOWNTOWN WHIPPING ON THE WAY TO YOU

YOU GOT SOMETHING THAT BELONGS TO ME

anyways

i wish i could access the files i kept in december and january but at some point i made all of them hidden files and i don't really know what happened but i must have done something wrong and accidentally disappeared them lol

i think in those months i was writing about having/recovering from covid and dating/recovering from []

artists i am phasing/have phased out of my listening

hm i thought there would be more

i thought pinegrove would have a more lingering resonance for me

i thought it might stay in my system like snail mail

but i was just a tourist in amperland

others i don't care to hear anymore that i don't really listen to anyways

it's not a dislike it's more like an allergy

except for faye webster. that is dislike + allergy

sometimes it is overwhelming to have access to so much music and sometimes i think about how much of my music taste is just what spotify has recommended to me over the years. sometimes i want to cease this process by quitting spotify and only listening to CDs but then how would i decide what CDs to listen to? it would just be some other kind of recommendation process like reading reviews or asking other people what to listen to

sometimes it is overwhelming to have access to so many romantic prospects and sometimes i think about how much of my dating history is just what tinder has put in front of me over the years. sometimes i want to cease this process by

hm i was hoping to get somewhere with that

[] stopped by just now <33 he's here studying

some artists i'm convinced only have listeners because of spotify algorithms. i know that's not possible but some artists just have that vibe to me. faye webster for example. spotify must be constantly recommending faye webster to the right people, based on the other better artists they are already listening to who they got into in more meaningful ways

who is getting into faye webster? who is reading/watching faye webster interviews? who is reading faye webster reviews?

i guess i have to now

this pitchfork headline is already irking me

Faye Webster on How a Shade of Blue, Her Boyfriend, and This One Animal Crossing Song Inspired Her New Album

i can't

alioop

i will never grow tired of american football, lol. also i have tried to kick pinegrove but i can't. i always come back to them. i am so tempted to listen to a bunch of faye webster--have never listened before. but now i want to pay attention to see if spotify recommends her.

hahaha

re: faye it is highly likely you will enjoy, the music is nice. curious to hear your thoughts if you explore!!

re: pinegrove i actually thought about getting the cardinal squares tattooed i got so attached to the music haha...would still be listening if i didn't now have such negative associations. evan stephens hall rocks and makes interesting word choices

two word choices that i never really figured out, from "hairpin":

through infidel skies
through ashpodel eyelids

09112023. good morning flounder

feeling resigned

but i think resignation can initiate recovery

because resignation involves letting go of something

letting go of hope for a certain outcome; some desire for/illusion of control

anyways i am 52 minutes into this eight-hour shift

caffeinated

managing various body discomforts

determined not to let this day go by without my participation!

i wish spotify wasn't social media

feeling defeated again

wish i could get answers

wish i had an explanation for the mystery tights in my laundry

wish i'd never met you

i mean this with all my heart

wish K would come talk to me

wish i was in [city] or [city] or even [city]

nice things

shoutout "lamar" from today. when you're having a bad enough time it can be just what you need to hear a rando say you look "nice enough to take to dinner"

09102023. four minutes

it was nice meeting [] this morning. woke up my music brain feel encouraged to try and do some recording after work today

sweet message from F yesterday it's interesting when people suddenly remember about you. crush going on four years now maybe my longest running. poor thing is trying to refriend the ex he's still in love with. made me sad for him, and sad for me that i don't have an ex i'm not grossed out by

called with big sib last night <3 was helpful in emotional and educational ways

by educational i mean she reminded me chat gpt exists, as a troubleshooting tool. like i can use it for accomplishing work and not just for analyzing my own journal entries. revelatory

by emotional i mean just talking to her reminds me of the type of person i am, idk how to explain -- the type of woman, specifically which is maybe weird to say. but after a long day yesterday of thinking (((against my will))) about the type of woman that i'm not (the type of woman that men have used me to get over) it was soothing to talk to the only other woman who shares my origins. if i had to break down the feeling it's like: i love her so i love me. if i love her then i love me. why would i want to be any other type of woman

things [] said this morning

what is a latte

damn nothing is really coming to mind. no specific quotes anyways but i remember topics and sentiments. i remember that he is the oldest of six. something about how he gets stressed out by too much input without output. like after listening to music for a while he's like oh no what am i doing i should be writing songs not listening to them (??) not relatable, i have infinite capacity for input, but it was interesting to hear his feelings

lots of criticisms of the local music scene which i always enjoy

damn that latte was really good. and i consumed it at an appropriate rate

i don't know why i'm always going out with men who seem like they're doing their best impression of a human

there is more swirling around in there but i'm struggling to fish anything out. i'm so tired

SOMETHING TROUBLING

i found a pair of tights in my laundry hamper

i haven't worn tights since i was in high school

i do not recognize the tights

i do not recognize the brand

they are my size

i have certainly never worn or possessed or purchased tights while living in this city

i do not know where these tights came from or how they landed in my laundry hamper

i have a scary theory that i don't even want to voice

what the fuck

i threw them away

09092023. good morning flounder

cannot overstate how difficult it was to get ready for work this morning

but anyways i'm here

listening to the new noname

soon the kiosk will open and i will have access to morning coffee!!!!

this day is passing quickly because of my limited lucidity. i'm barely even feeling it

feeling kinda bad after indulging a bad habit but i think i'm done

wondering how i'm coming across to people today. probably tired and withdrawn

that's ok

as long as i'm not fawning

while i was home this weekend i noticed how much [] fawns her way through interactions and it reminded me not to do that

next lunch then two more hours then home <3

3 a.m.

just did my information technology homework i think i just coded or something idk

09082023. need to sleep!!!

alioop

it’s hard to tell if i am being too hard on myself or if i actually have a good critical eye

i feel this way constantly. felt it a lot playing shows in college

had a good weekend!!!! by weekend i mean thursday and friday

came home to a caffeinated + manic A. he is currently deconstructing a rotisserie chicken (11:57 p.m.). packing up the thighs for me because they taste too "meaty" for him

saw M this morning <333

spent the afternoon with little sib

and likely seeing big sib next weekend! i am a lucky girl. with concerning mileage

taking a break from shoegaze and slowcore and all related genres

09072023. good morning flounder

finished out last night feeling ok. reasons for this:

quick voice check-in!

dr. g has some doubt about the spasmodic dysphonia diagnosis so they're stopping the botox treatments for now. they think it's possible my improvements are from the therapy and not the injection. the botox should wear off by october, at which point i will go back in for testing, where they record me making various sounds and reading some scripts designed to activate SD symptoms. if i've gotten worse they will inject me again. if not i guess i'm a free woman

sometimes i have to take a break from being bladebby

one of the (many) mistakes i think i made in my relationship with [] was the amount of me-content i made available to him. my music and writing is public and in addition to that i wrote letters and sent recordings. while we were together this meant he could study / extrapolate about me without consulting me about his conclusions. now that we're not together this means when he's thinking about me he can just refer to a piece of me-content (he revealed that he does this. a depressing and pointless disclosure but so were a lot of things he said in that final conversation). i have no reference materials other than some emails (now archived) and our text conversation i guess but i hate reading that. this lack of content makes it more tempting for me to make contact (don't do this). whereas he seems content to just read me like a book character. for all i know he could be orbiting the flounderverse -- he was always good at finding me, which i used to like but now find unsettling and unfair. maybe i have made myself too easy to find

while we were breaking up we got to a certain topic (The topic) which we had never discussed explicitly before. he said "we've talked about this and you said _____." when i challenged this claim he explained that i said ____ in an letter (he did not even ask for clarification). i wrote something in a letter several weeks ago = we talked about it ? you read four sentences i wrote = you understand all my feelings ? ok makes sense

i believe in the power of language but i think he believed in it a little too much maybe more than he believed in like. real-time conversation

or he just wasn't interested in having a conversation about it because he had already made a decision and he should've just said that

ALIOOP

bluet as in flower as in maggie nelson thank you for asking <3 i didn't know about the damselfly what an amazing bug

alioop's paper cranes have inspired me to show appreciation to my favorite sites so i will take this time to let

BUGLEAGUE

know that i really like their poems and have on occasion shared them with friends. they posted the one about the fly right around when A and i were dealing with the fly infestation and we had a laugh

anyways i'm home now, had a giant spicy meal with parents + little brother

really appreciated talking to L today. what a sweet person

also appreciated my interaction with K but i wish he would be more clear

also appreciated when i said good morning as i walked through the room and without looking up T was like is that ___? i like to guess by the voice. that wasn't so hard was it? and then laughed to himself. some people can create a moment out of anything

deeply appreciated my three-person grad school group chat today. G texted to remind us to make our posts. R shared that their plans to work ahead might be "nerfed" by an impending breakup. i shared about my recent experience, we agreed it must be breakup season and then everyone sent pictures of their animals. +25 mood. lasting positive moodlet

09062023. five hours 43 minutes

felt like fall outside this morning which was a relief because it was starting to feel like i was going to be stuck in summer forever

goodbye summer 2023 i will never understand what the fuck happened here oh well

thinking about going home tomorrow to see little sib and pick up recording gear. potential risks include not having time to do school and emotional turmoil from being in proximity to []

something i think about is the way he described his last break up -- "she kept accusing me of falling out of love with her." well you were breaking up with her? lol. i wanted to "accuse" him of the same thing

had an unusually honest conversation with a manager

work is going well other things are not

HELLO ALIOOP

it was honestly startling to find myself in your flounder. having a teary moment. thank you for the crane. i really like the way you write too

i am glad you're here! protect your feathers!!

09052023. one hour 37 minutes

idk why i've always avoided drinking coffee in the morning. at some point i got in the habit of waiting til after lunch. no more! now is the time for morning coffee

09042023. good morning

it has been years since i woke up crying. my poor eyes. must get more eye drops

in the end what got me out of bed was the activity in my class group chat. someone said something silly and for some reason it helped. also an instagram comment from a coworker. these people have no idea they helped me get up today. haha

will be sad and angry and confused for a while. darn. i barely have the energy to feel what i'm feeling. and certainly not the time. wish i could stop

given the option i would seriously consider eternal sunshine of the spotless mind-ing this from my memory

but the brain damage would probably not be worth it

it was interesting to be on the receiving end of a termination, to be powerless like that. when i realized what was happening i felt sick. i noticed him go through the lines that i have gone through before: [announcement of termination] --> [explanation] --> [weak expressions of remorse / inner conflict] --> [hollow declaration of love]. actually i have always stopped after step #3

had an ok time out studying today

recovering from / coping with this seems very possible just tedious

on the spotify for artists audience demographics in addition to the gender and age breakdown they should tell you what percentage of your followers are failed relationships

wrote a song :)

A is back <3 sometimes it seems his timing is impeccable like he arrives just in time to redirect me from rock bottom. but i think i actually just specifically do destructive things while he's away. it's hard to do destructive things while he's here. so when he comes back recovery time automatically begins

09032023. bad bad bad day bad

unbelievably nauseatingly bad

bad

irreversibly

tragically

comically?

yes comical

predictable

i tried to explain it to D and he said it didn't make any sense. he's right

nonsensically bad

SENSATIONALLY bad!

walking through walmart, silent, weeping clutching two frozen meals and a box of tissues bad

invigoratingly

deliciously

needlessly

bad

ok so this is my september starting point

wonder where i'll end up