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I have made a neocities almost a year ago, in the beginning of May 2022. I tried some stuff, but moved on temporarily onto other things. But the idea really appealed to me - I used to have a myspace, I used to host my own site on piczo, and I played around with Tumblr themes since 2010. It would give me so much creativity back and revive my love and interest for coding, no matter how bad mine was. I've been horrified at what the web has turned into. It wasn't this great adventure anymore where exploring felt great and you discovered a lot of interesting people and were glad to be seen by them as well.
No, suddenly browsing was scary. It was scary because there was so much content to be upset about, to become enraged, to fight about. And it didn't feel voluntary anymore, it didn't feel like a choice. I couldn't go on the computer for one hour of dedicated browsing, no; smartphones and the addictiveness of social media apps made it seem like it was the opposite. I had to actually take time away from it to be offline for an hour.
Like the majority of life was spent online and the offline moments were some exceptions. It became so automatic. Bored, hungry, sad, stressed, curious, needing a break from whatever you were doing? Just scrolling.
And then it was just outrage and ads. Content making you consume as much as possible, content that will make you want to buy lots of makeup and clothes and small useless trinkets and accessories. Content that made you hate yourself in the mirror. Everything was decided by likes and followers. The snarkiest and edgiest comments got the most attention and won the fight. Being seen meant being a target for unwanted images, harassment, doxxing, etc. by someones large fanbase.
After just a little while, you start to frame your thoughts in a way that would get the most engagement online. Your inner voice or narrator or the way you talk out loud about things is like the people online talk. You gotta take the perfect pic of this so you can post it and it fits in your profile aesthetic and is nice to look at. Without that, it might not have happened at all.
I spent so much of my teen life extremely online, and at some point my life revolved around checking feeds. Waking up the morning and checking Facebook for 3 hours, checking Instagram for 2, checking Tumblr for 3, and then repeat because during that, I could restart at Facebook again. Opening the apps and websites was usually accompanied with stomach aches and a racing heart because I was scared that in my absence (sleep), someone had targeted me and I wasn't there to defend myself. I was scared to see what I found. I can only imagine how bad it is for teens nowadays, when they feel this so badly they have to lock their Twitter down over night and put "(sleeping)" in their display names.
Anyway, at some point, I took control over my life. Deleted and deinstalled Facebook, Instagram, Reddit, and all kinds of services and distractions. Got more privacy minded (several browser add-ons, hardening Firefox, VPNs etc). Put timers and blockers onto my devices. What remained was being a co-leader for the NoSurf movement on Reddit before I left (due to sexual harassment by another leader/mod) and it got disbanded.
I lived 2 years blissfully without any social media or anything akin to that, and used the internet simply for recipes and checking my email.
But sadly a health scare got me back into scrolling some without an account, and then the pandemic got me back in. Hanging out on Discord again, scrolling Reddit, briefly having a Twitter, Tiktok and an Instagram again. Remaking a Tumblr.
But I've been on my way back to a better usage, and supporting better internet initiatives and platforms. All I have left is a Tumblr blog as an archive for art projects, a Pinterest for inspiration that I don't really use, and Discord for communication. I don't need anything else. I enjoy the culture on Neocities far more. I finally managed to make a better page out of mine, and I keep improving it. I am currently exploring more old-web-esque, slow, small, highly creative places providing you with lots of freedom. Old status websites, or sites like this one. It's intense how much modern internet has locked down designs.
I really like the privacy, being outrage free, seeing small niche hobbies and passion, and feeling safe from attacks and crazy hordes.
I love the creative freedom and the rebellious feeling, the partial reclamation of the internet.
I love supporting platforms that align more with my views and morals.
I love not having to lie and justify why I am still on a platform that is ruining the planet and our politics and our attention spans and dopamine receptors, led by fascists.
I love being able to freely choose when I go online and what I do, controlling it instead of being controlled.
I love engaging in media I can't access via smartphone because it's not meant to be accessed on one.
I love escaping the brain rot of other platforms.
I love how my online time is now focused on my own creation and production, being in a flow state for hours and being proud of what I do, instead of bland monotone consumption.
I love how engaging on different platforms that value creativity and freedom more than money, data and engagement, the people treat eachother differently and it humanizes the other, after years of being taught to hate eachother and everyone becoming a little more misanthropic.
I try to get the word out as much as possible about these types of pages. I hope people find a little of themselves in it, or something new, something healthier, something less tiring and draining. Something more fun but not addictive. I hope they read the manifestos at the Yesterweb website and think about their own habits and wishes for the internet.
I will cancel my Netflix this month, too. It is time.
𓇽 ° . ༻ 𓈒 ꒪ ๋ ° .𓏲⠀ ๋࣭ ♡ ͘ ࣭⠀⸰ ⋆ ֗ ִ ᨒ .⋆ﾟ. ͘ ࣭⠀⸰ ♡ 𓂂 ◌ 𓇽 ° . ๋ 𓂂 ⠀✼ 𓇽