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Transformers (Movie)

3 of 5 Stars

I grew up with the Transformers cartoons, toys and the comics, but eventually lost interest. Still, there’s some sort of primal thrill—at least for anyone who grew up as a boy in 1980s America—in seeing giant robots fighting each other. So I made sure to to catch the movie while it was still in theaters.

It was better constructed than I expected. They had a plausible reason for the Autobots and Decepticons to be on Earth, and they were very good about following up on exposition. Every gun that appeared on the wall was eventually fired, down to Sam’s eBay auctions, with one exception: I really expected them to blow up Hoover Dam.

The effects were good, and I had fun identifying scenery. Flying around LA was nice, because they managed to get a really clear day to shoot, and you could actually see clear to Orange County in one shot. Some of the humor was good (I particularly liked zapping the Nokia, and attendant comments), but too much of it was forced, and some of it was just plain crude. I’m sorry, but Bumblebee “leaking lubricant” over someone was past the line.

Anyway, I’m glad I saw it on the big screen. There were a lot of great moments in it, but a lot of the film was just kind of tedious. It felt like they worked so hard on the details that they managed to miss the big picture. Which is kind of ironic for, well, a big picture.

Side note about the ending (spoilers!) I had a problem with the epilogue in which they’re dumping the Decepticon corpses at the bottom of the ocean so that there’s no evidence. What, so the thousands of people who saw them duking it out in downtown ~LA~ Mission City, not to mention the dozens (or probably hundreds) of deaths, are all going to keep quiet? Video taken on cell phones? Photos? You can bet there would have been news crews on hand, and even if they couldn’t transmit, they would have at least been recording.

Covering up the fact that giant robots were battling each other, special forces units with heavy artillery, and a freaking air force wing, would have been like covering up the fact that airplanes were involved in 9/11.

— Kelson Vibber, 2007-09-01