💾 Archived View for gem.nb-tort.com › messages.gmi captured on 2023-09-08 at 15:48:28. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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I'm an adult and I can do that without any worry of needing to come back. The main reasons for it was because my girlfriend lives where I moved, along with the fact that I didn't want to live with my parents for any longer. I don't think they're that great in general, and here you can see how my dad treats me after all this happening. Before reading you should know this:
D: I think it's pretty fucked up that you didn't have the ball to say what you needed to say. Your whole generation hides behind a screen and pretend to be something you're not. You all are so confused and just want to belong and be a part of something and you don't even know what that something is. I still love you but you owe mother an apology. You think you got it all figured out. You have absolutely no idea what it means to go out on your own. It's a lot harder than you think. You can't even drive. Not everyone is like your mother and I they will get tired of having to take you places and we'll I've said enough. I still love you and well I guess you can take care of yourself. You have my number call me if you need to talk. Sorry I haven't been there like I should have but I forgave myself long time ago. I did the best that I could with what I knew. You will understand what I'm talking about as you get older right now you know everything and it's hard to teach someone who knows everything.
N: I hope I handle life better than you then.
D: I hope you do too.You really just crushed me right now I'm at a loss of words. I fuck thought this was going to be my chance to rebuild my relationship with you and Greg. I cried in front of my boss and his wife last Saturday because I was so grateful that i was going to get a second chance with my boys. To bond while I taught you all some life skills I was so excited to get away from all the distractions and thought we were going to bond together and now you just shit all over me. I've never asked you for a cent to live under my roof. You will soon find out that while I didn't take money from you that's not going to stop everyone else from taking it from you. Your generation is so lost. Only a generation like yours who has never had to do a damn thing can walk around playing a victim. Want to blame every damn thing on everyone else and not take responsibility for anything.
D: You didn't have to leave the way you did.
N: Can't change the past and I don't want to live in the future you envision ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
D: You could have done it respectfully. You want to see everyone else's faults but can't see your own. It's hard to see the picture when you're in the frame. Try removing the plank in your own eye before removing the spec of dust in another's eye. You act like you are better than everyone else but all you do is bitch and complain about your coworkers. But you would never say it to their face would you.
N: Never said what I did was respectful
N: Also only one coworker I bitch about
N: :p
N: Also I did say it to their face lol
N: Would've known if you asked :)
D: No shit you don't think I know that. You could have done it respectfully and not like a little bitch. You will see soon enough you don't know half the shit that I forgot. I'm done you made your bed lay in it. This is probably the best thing that you could have happened for you. In all actuality. Nothing like being thrown in the ocean and learning how to swim. I love you good luck. I hope you prove me wrong. I would love to eat my words. Just don't be so prideful if and when you fail to reach out. I will leave you be life is waiting for you go experience it and all its got to offer the good the bad the ugly and the lonely.
N: "I wanna rebuild a relationship with you"
"You're a bitch with no balls"
N: Do you have dementia or are you just dumb?
N: I won't prove you wrong because you won't see me do it :)
D: Like I said love you and good luck!
N: Thanks! 😊
D: You are welcome you are my son and I want what is best for you even when it hurts like it does.
D: Love you bud!
N: You called me a bitch.
N: ❤️
D: I was upset I had a right to be you called me a piece of shit and you left rather abruptly and really tore into your mother and I I'm sorry that I called you a bitch but I was fucking pissed your mother didn't deserve that I didn't deserve that I have no problem with you moving out you could have done it so much better and easier by simply saying hey I don't want to move out there I found an apartment I saved up some money and I'm going to move out you didn't have to call us out on a bunch of shit we're not perfect but we're a hell of a lot better than we used to be
N: Digging a bigger hole saying I deserve that, but cool
N: And I didn't because I know you would try to tell me otherwise. You aren't the kind of person that would take "hey I'm moving I don't wanna be in lampassas"
Dad rings me up, I do not pick up.
N: I'm not answering.
D: Okay when was the last time you called me a piece of shit never why because it probably wouldn't have ended well for you. And since when would I have not accepted your answer or told you otherwise I didn't do that to your sisters I want you all to get out of the house I ain't kicking your ass though I want y'all to be able to stand up and live on your own do what you want that's part of growing up and becoming a man so no there's no way in hell I would've stopped you from going and moving out I wouldn't have even tried to but for you to fucking attack us that fucking uncalled for dude we haven't done shit to you offended you by saying some words that weren't even talking to you or directed towards you throw some fucking skins some thick skin cuz this world is a hell of a lot tougher than I am dude I love you man I have no problem with you moving out and I'm saying that right now and I would have said it then but you didn't even give me the opportunity to I would have had much more Pride in sending you off on your way with you coming and saying hey look I don't want to go with you but being truthful with me instead of just acting like everything was okay
N: Oh you finally addressed the saying slurs! Fun thing about slurs, just because you aren't calling me them doesn't mean you should call other people that! For instance, you shouldn't call P the n word as P is a pretty chill dude and doesn't deserve to be disrespected. The fact you think that just because I'm not directly affected shows that you don't understand why I don't like you or want to be associated with you.
N: Have a good rest of your evening
N: ✌️
D: Hahahah 🤣🤣🤣🤣 man you think this world is all unicorns and rainbows. I hate to say it your bubble is about to burst. If I thought P was a cover you eyes a nigger do you think I'd let him in my house. See to you nigger is a ethnicity or race. And it's not negger is a worthless person who takes and doesn't contribute and thinks that everything is owed to them. They chose to be a victim even though they have been born in the greatest country in the world and have every bit the same chance of building a life from nothing like I have.. you are stuck on this bullshit called equity. That is not how it works.. It's equality meaning that it doesn't matter who or where you come from you have the same right to bust your to get ahead.. you fucking think that people just pay me more than 80g of the other workers because they like me even though I have a niche grade education. Fuck no I get paid more because I work hard and produce more than everyone else. Not to mention I never say nigger I say nigga. But back in my day that's a term or endearment. Like a friend. You're really going to make this the hill you die on. You have no idea how much you need people to get where you want to go your family is one you probably should hold on too just saying.
D: Still love you
D: I got to get back to work I'm out here at the property by myself cutting down trees chopping the fucking grass and everything else cuz that's what I do I work all day everyday to get what I want
I then proceeded to send an image of my notes app, which breaks down everything in the long message my dad sent. Because the text in that image is breaking down bit for bit what he says, I have put it in it's own separate page, just to avoid recursion. You can find it on the next line.
N: The paragraphs in quotes are you, fyi.
N: Oh yeah the last message to:
I'm glad to see that you still don't understand that neither mom or W are happy with the decision you made. Fun to see that you think that if you're still absent eventually you won't and then that'll make everyone magically happy. For someone who think I live in unicorns and rainbows you sure have a wild ass fantasy lol
D: Wow that's funny because I asked your mother if she wanted to move out here knowing she was going to say fuck that. I was kinda joking when I said it to. She was the one who said yes let's do it. I was just as surprised as you son. Then when it looked like we weren't going to be able to get it. She said it's OK I know it is going to work out. So you confuse being stressed out from the whole process. We all get stressed out but that doesn't mean she wasn't on board. I was actually ok with it not going through but some how it did and that's how you know it is the right thing to do. It's when you let go and it all works out. Kinda this whole deal with you wanting to move out and blame your misunderstanding of how everything works. See you see things as absolute and nothing is absolute. Your generation thinks that you are right and everyone else is wrong. You don't even leave room for debate. Back in the day we were taught how to think for ourselves. Your generation is being taught what to think. There's a big difference but beause it's all you know you don't know any better and will try and shut down or demonize anyone who disagrees with you. Not to mention I'm a grown ass man and I'll be damned if you think I have to ask for your permission to move. And you have the right to do is move out. Just like you did. So if you're pissed off that I didn't ask your permission because you didn't approve. Well sorry not sorry this is where you get to experience all that life has to offer and all the cost that go with it. Still love you!
N: I ain't reading all that. Saw the first sentence and thought something is up
D: That message totally explsined what you just said y'all are so close-minded you won't read or listen to anything but what you think you think you're right and that's it end of story no one else can have a different opinion fuck it I don't give a shit do what you want you're going to anyways your fucking figure it out
N: Because, while this is anecdotal, she hasn't said one good thing about moving to me or W. Only negative shit and same with you in general. Why would a mom talk shit about thier own dad?
After typing this out, it makes it sound like I said she hates her dad, not her husband. But the point should come across either way.
N: Think about that while I head to bed. Night
D: Peace son love you but I got to get back to work
N: Lmao
N: I did a lit about the schedule
D: I thought you're going to bed
N: FIVE YEAR OLD
N: But yeah
N: Night :)
D: See I got to go back to work cuz that's what I do I work for a living I don't make your fucking excuses I fucking decide what I'm goign to do and I make it happen I don't blame my problems on everybody else you didn't ask me if I could move or I wanted to I don't have to
N: Coudln't sleep, needed some water.
I still am going to work, and I also decide what I'm going to do? I decided to move out and tell you why I don't think you're a good person
N: Simple as that
D: You have no idea what a bad person is I never beat you like my mother did I'll use your words you're a piece of shit
D: Still love you but fuck it you can live on your own do what you fuck you want you'll figure it out eventually not my problem
D: Yeah I felt fucking bad at first but fuck that shit you want to continue to just disrespect me dude fuck it you'll figure it out I promise it's not the way you think it it
N: "love you"
"You're a bitch"
N: Which is it dude
N: Can't be both silly
D: I'm not the one hiding behind my phone and want to take a fucking car I can't say anything to someone's fucking face
D: You want to know what a bitch is someone who hides behind the phone who won't say it to their face who won't do it in person who won't even take another person's call cuz he'll get his feelings hurt that's a bitch you would have never fucking called me that to my face cuz I promise you I'd have showed you what a bitch was by slapping you right in your fucking mouth
D: Yes I said that and I still fucking love you that's the part you don't fucking understand people can get upset and have disagreements but I still love you I still want what's best for you but the best thing for you is for you to figure it out on your own because you think you fucking know everything and I promise you it's going to fucking come to a head
D: Never in my fucking mind would I have ever thought to talk to my dad the way you talk to me
N: Nah I'm actually only texting so I can keep this documented. I wanna be sure that any time I look back on life thinking if I did things wrong that I'll be reassured that I did the right thing.
D: Bunch of spoiled little pussies is what y'all are pussies yeah I said it fucking God damn bunch of fucking bitches
N: Lmao
N: Stay mad
D: You'll figure it out bud you'll figure it out
N: Okie dokie
D: 👍
N: 👍🏿
D: Yeah remember that definition I gave you you fit that want to take but not contribute think everything's owed to them yeah you fit the definition
D: Well you fucking made it easy for me to get over being sad
N: I literally don't? I'm working silly
N: I never told you my living situation or anything about where I am or what I'm specifically doing. You're just assuming the worst to justify saying this shit lmaooooooo
D: Look at that shit clear this motherfucker out by myself yes I wanted you and W both to be a part of it so we could bond and talk about shit but look at that I don't need you I can do it by myself I always have looks like I always will you know contribute to damn thing never did fucking can't even keep your fucking room clean
He then sends an image of a tree he sawed down. For privacy reasons, this is not shown.
D: I don't know what you're fucking whole reason was for reaching out but if it was to piss me off you did that so I hope you're fucking happy cuz I don't give a fuck anymore fuck you can go sleep under a fucking bridge for all I give a shit
N: Dude you're making shit up you messaged ME
N: also don't worry, I'd rather sleep under a bridge that be with you :)
N: cool tree btw
He sends another picture of the tree.
N: Nice
D: I still love you bud!
D: I love you bud! I know you originally said to sale or give away your stuff. And mom said she'd put it in storage for you. Well we did but she just said that she was taking O and P over to the storage because P wanted to go through it. Don't get pissed off but if you don't want him to I will stop it. Don't call or text your mother talking back or down to her. Remember you left it here and said to get rid of it. Let me know what you want me to do.
It should be mentioned now that while I did write nasty things against my mom, I have apologized to her in that my anger wasn't directed towards the right person, and that while I hate some of the shittiest things she's done, I feel bad for her as she it still with this psychopath.
D: Ok well this is where you learn to take responsibility because you can't blame anyone but yourself for the decision you made. I love you bud but that's how we learn.
N: I literally didn't say anything was going bad?
N: And it's fine that P goes through it
N: There's a PS3, a decapitated laptop that has pretty good specs,
N: Also I talked to mom recently because I felt bad that I told her off too harshly compared to you.
D: Good that makes me feel good that you talked with your mother. I still love you and I know you might not think so but I always have and always will. I know I said some shit that I shouldn't have and that's what happens sometimes. None of us are perfect son but we can always do better. I'm still here I'm not going anywhere. Well we are moving but you know what I mean. It would be cool to see you before we have to be out Thursday.
N: You've had a long time to be much better than you are now
D: True but as you continue living this life you will learn that it's not as easy as it sounds. You hold me to a standard no one can live up to. Not to mention I am ok with where I'm at right now. It's like you forget that I was a meth addict who didn't own shit. Who had a negative net worth. Meaning I owed more Money that I would have if I sold everything. And now I'm worth close to a quarter million. So not every part of me has evolved and I'm not where I want to be but I damn sure ain't where I use to be. You can continue to be mad at me but that really doesn't affect me as much as it affects you. Because people talk shit about me all the time. I just keep on doing what I do and the more I do the closer I get to my goals. Even this situation here between you can me will work out to both our benefit and our relationship will eventually get restored but not before we learn some valuable life lessons.
D: Love you bud! Hope you find time to come see us before we get out of here. But more than that I hope you learn how to forgive. Not for my sake but for yours. Harboring anger or hatred towards anyone does nothing to the person you hold it towards. It robs you of finding peace in your present situation. I can't do it for you or I would but Don't let your anger rob you of the life you want. It's easy to get caught up in the technical process of determining what your values are. And you can be right all you want and still at the end of the day end up a million miles away from your intended target. So keep that in mind. Life is not fair it's a zero some game. But if your heart is right then you have the opportunity to impact others in ways other people can't. Can you save the world? No! But can you leave it better than you found it? Absolutely and that's what I intended on doing.
N: What standard do you think I'm setting you up for that's too unrealistic?
D: To think that I won't make mistake because apparently I should have figured it out by now.
D: Listen to this song bud I think it's awesome.
D: Stick to your guns son make me proud don't ever back up don't rver back down.
He then sends a link to this video:
N: That's not what I'm trying to put you up for, I'm sorry if I made you feel that
N: I'm not telling you what I think you should work on, because at that point you wouldn't do it for yourself you'd be doing it for someone else
D: That makes sense but has it ever crossed your mind that almost everything I've ever done has been for someone else. The reason I worked as hard as I did and still do. That is to take care of my family. That is what I allow to frive me. I don't do it because it's fun I do it because I have a standard of living that I'm trying to provide my family and I will do what ever is nessisary to make that happen. Am I perfect in my delivery? No not at all. I can focus on what's working for me at the time. While I succees a little in making money I became a failure at being a dad. If I had a chance to change those things knowing what I know now would I do it differently yes there's no doubt. But that's not reality. I did the best I knew at the time. And to be honest with you I'm fucking proud of myself. Whether you are or not. I was homeless most my childhood had a mother that beat and abandoned us. Both parents drug addicts have brothers who have been locked up for decades. But some how I've been able to overcome a lot of shit so if my language is what I have to work on I think I can do it I've overcome much more than that. I love you bud I need to try and get the rest of this stuff loaded up so I can take it to storage before they close.
N: Good luck