💾 Archived View for displ.nl captured on 2023-07-22 at 16:01:17. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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╒═════════════╗ │ hisacro's ╔╣ ╓───────┐ Partner In Den │ Sracpebo╳ ┊╠═══╣ Ascii ├──m─┬─m──────────────────────────╖ ┕────────────┊╜ ╙─+ures─┘ │ gemini://displ.nl/golu.gmi ║ ┊_ _ └────────────────────────────╜ ·¯ `·. ` ¯ ` . _ '· ` ´
07-22
What to do when sense of guilt slaps you at end of the day? with only
few moments left in the day, curling up in bed and drained of motivat
ion, rewinding past - people who were no more, moved far away and the
struck yourself hoplelessly waiting in the void.
Closing my eyes and sinking in distorted pleasures - darker waves.
07-21
days are scrolling past like banners, So fast. Trying things out but
does it go into mind? unsure. The only great thing is my little smili
ng companion around. Sleep is takimg me over 24x7.
07-19
Woke early and day went by tinkering normal modes - lattice vibration
07-18 day
Today was most natural day. I was feeling really safe in a tight embra
ce, I cannot find words to explain these. All the teeny tiny things
about golu is burnt into back of head. So pure bond, Nothing is taboo
between US!
07-18
This is morning of 18th, I have figured a way to use this ed wrapper
as well as asked my partner to delve into gemini too. Gave SSH- access
and simple script to getting started. Feeling good about these, let's
see we can be regular from now on
.wq
07-17
Planning to write a simple wrapper to edit using ed text editor, let's
see how this is go
04-22
Right At this moment I'm staring at my love, sleeping on my shoulders
I'm totally uncertain about the progress we made or about to make and
the things I have done so far were very 'unconventional me'
02-06
I have watched the one movie that I kept reserve for around 8 years.
I know I'll cry my hearts out watching that and I really did, current
concrete jungle doesn't help either.
It's Balu Mahendra's Thalaimuraigal. Final film of his, portraying the
grandfather grandson relation. I don't want to blunt it out the incide
nt in my case. I was asssured by my parents it was peaceful atleast.
I didn't have a great relation with my pa side grandfather but
I always envied the lifestyle he was having. After my grand mother
passed 15 years back, he was surviving alone. Not lonely though since
he was always surrounded by 5(4, excluding my father) of his children
That was the place I burnt in my mind as proper countryside, the old
tile roof, a stream at the back, a cow shed, a well where I was forced
to learn swimming with bottle gourd shell tied to my back - haunting
memories of it were fresh still now, an unfunctional gober gas plant,
thinnai - a raised pillar on veranda where I hurt my chin and had a
first stitch after bleeding for a while, forcefully plucking my first
milk teeth, goofing around with younger cousins - not in contact any
more now.
I blurtted out words to that side of family pin pointing their behavi
ours and mistakes. Words! those burns wont go away easy.
Will I ever get myself to visit my native place? after the only reason
is lost now too. I don't think it will be happening anytime soon
Here today, gone tomorrow
The END.
01-21
A lot has happened! I have moved out of home and shifted to a new stat
e made relations that will last for years hopefully and re-shifted to
another state.
I just cannot process thoughts anymore, it's always hectic and this is
one of the congested shitehole city in the world. I have been called
as sadists by many of close friends, now it feels like I'm doing that
to myself in the name of coming of out comfort zone, Let's see where
this heads. One thing that makes me shiver the most is I might
suffocate my innocent friend too.
Mental stability on the drain
11-09
A colleague of my pa's also a neighbour had an unforunate fall playing
shuttle cock and gone lifeless. He and his family were close 15 years
back untill pile of verbal exchanges through third party reached ears.
Myself and cousin used to play gully cricket with him when his family
goes away to their native place, picture of me carrying my new bat in
red cross bag to his home is burnt in my mind so does the mock from
cousin for my bat's care.
News was sudden this morning, my pa was on the way to visit him but he
seemed to lost pulse on the spot of fall. Only in the instance of pre
funeral my parents went to their house after years, such a fate! ma
prepared food for them later.
I have counted many 'human life is short, here today gone tomorrow'
dialogues today, even saw a elder doing visual action of shuttle smash
and fall to a person setting DTH dish
11-08
The most difficult thing to write? describing nothingness. What I do
during the phase is playing `tetris -l 9` with background podcast or
music going, this is the only multi task I enjoy without two thoughts
clashing.
11-07
It happens every time when I'm nearing deadline, finding very interest
ing things that would make me forget what's happening around on an
extremely tiring situation - it's called 'arse under burning cushion'
effect
There's Let me enjoy this Oh shoot it got me!
Fire under o Fluffy cushion o (consolidates)
Your Arse! \_ ./ Anyways worth the
.'./ ..'| Burnt Arse
It's a manga/comics this time 'Hirayasumi' and theme is very close to
the described situation above! A slice of life about a feel-good man
living in Tokoyo and how events fit+fold around.
11-06
Within a blink, entries are 2 months old. I can only vaguely remember
what came inbetween, wonder why 'go out and start now' doesn't work as
intended. Even the mere plain text isn't flowing consistently,
Douché Mode - The Eejit in Me
Nan nan Nana NaanaNa na na
If I could just hide
The Eejit inside
And keep him denied
How sweet life would be
If I could be free
From the Eejit in me
09-18
o - o - .o Going into
.|\ .<\ - .< \ - ,-o_ Areo Position
) >() - ()/ () - () \() - ¯ ()/ ()
09-15
It was daunting to see myna carry a plastic wrapper and escape the
crow's chase. 21st century I suppose
09-14
[we know] _
˛., .´ `
.´ `./ o o \
Fungi Are / O O \ - )
Funtastic ( - )- - - ¯
¯- - - -¯ | |
│ │ | |
ad| |ldsal |ddlds
rrrkl dldkLdKrddklddld
09-13
Last week a dragonfly wandered ¸'¯l When I was visitng my pa's
on roof when I opened the door / j , native place, a delta region
I don't remember spotting one / /' \ full of paddy fields.
since my childhood around / ./ j
these parts, water bodies / / / Draggos fascinated me with
have changed - trashes / ,/' ,·' striking colors, markings
started to pile on the /./ . ´ and each being almost unique
banks shrinking sizes / /.·´
of these. Realized 8.-============o< I remember hearing stories
dragonflies are now ¯\/ \`, from parents; kiddos had
a rare sight! __/_/_ assortments of dragonflies
/ ˛ ) tied with threads and carried
Rewinding back to / /¯¯¯, \ around showing off! organic
past my first encoun ¯¯¯\ j balloons I suppose - cannot
ter with draggos were ¯´ picture my pa doing though.
09-12
This was initially meant to be a replay on the mailing but, by the I
finished writing; I looked back on the thread and realized that the
person was asking to choose from his list so it was never made public
untill now, and there's no change from my early 2020 selections too -
I will still recommend these today.
How not to be a creep and strike a conversation
+--------+ +-----------+
.|favorite| .Bye /¯¯¯/\ ¸·|let me toss|
o´ | movies?| o o7 /_¯ /¯˜ o | this list |
\\ +--------+ /|\ '´\ /_¯ / /|\ +-----------+
| / \ / \ ___/_¯ / / \
\¸´ \¸´
¯¯¯
I'm more into documentaries than movies nowadays, very few movies real
ly resonated with me. My three picks,
Yokomichi Yonosuke (2013)
Le Rayon vert (1986)
Lucky (2017)
Ever wondered what this person life/daily routine is? that's the core
of these movies. The storyline is just the character development in a
sense you're experiencing main character's life without any motive.
What's so different?
Artists get freedom to live as themselves than acting as someone else
Since emphasis is more on character than the actual plot, stories are
developed based on exact actors in mind. This was actually the case
with all Éric Rohmer movies; Yonosuke was adopted from Novel - never
got hold of it and no translations sadly; Lucky was the final movie
of a great actor, Harry Dean - never admitted he was acting.
I picked these three in the order based on the timeline they portray,
Yonosuke starts with early 20s, Eric's middle age and then lucky..
09-11
My personal best at starving/fasting was a week, even though I had res
pect for food before - it quadrupled that feeling; Also made me very
vocal towards careless people leaving non empty plates behind. Noting
down inherited recipes from ma is on my to-do list, that will make me
appreciate the food even more.
09-10
. , ¸-,
Straight frames are a thing HL_______________\\ Cycling Inside
of beauty, it took me long / (˜¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯˜k\ The Frame
time to realize because //^\\ o //\\
they are every where here // \\ /\ // '=' That must be
Very recently I stumbled // \\ ·\ () // one of the hard
on these standard cycle // \\ ()·´¯¯// est ascent with
races, it's a show of //\ ˛_o \\ / // sixty degree slope
sheer determination (¯¯ '\( )\ \ \\/ // straight into handle
despite all setbacks ¯¯¯ ===..( )_ \\_ // bar joints;
and makes me not to whine ¯¯¯==( )/ Descending into bottom
about things I don't have access ¯´ bracket shell hole; a
to; just proceeding further. ticket to hell hole?
09-05
¸_ ˛_
(~ ) ( )
o \ /´°
\. °`v atleast I'm watering
| `˛ |
¯¯¯
09-04
It's fun to talk to friends after not being in contact for months even
years, you get the chance to recite what you have been doing since and
relook at changed points of interest; only when I get asked 'are you
into that still' I realize it's a thing of past.
I always had such calls in very unexpected moments and most of the
time it ended with me appreciating good and idiotic past things; like
one time when I drilled a 75 years old buliding with rental hammering
action dril, me and my friend thought playing thrash metal will supp
ress the sound - how navie, vibration shook the whole block and I got
a proper dose from my seniors, only made me praise the solid const
ruction!
09-03
I developed a stigma around mobile phone, it all started with speaking
When I was kid I used to run in circles around home refusing when pare
nts hand the mobile to me for continuing conversation, nothing changed
after all these years - I just refuse bluntly and no more sprinting.
This wasn't the case with answering telephones firsthand, game of pred
icting who within seconds always brings joy. Another aspect of tele
phone calls were, the calling party doesn't expect you to know them;
overlooking fancy tele-messagers and registers.
If I call a friend on mobile, ofcourse I want them to answer; hell-o X
same goes for them. I have prolonged conversations to guess the party
instead of asking 'who are you' right away, why so? it might be sad
knowing they weren't registered on my mind so my goto reason - a very
different digital voice
Around one time my mobile had only parents' number for emergency and
contacts were noted on paper. It didn't make me to love answering the
phone but was fun attending and seeing how parties reacted with my
horrible guesses. I remember one such call, it was from my grandfather
but it had a reverb of someone speaking from well's inside, initially
I thought it was my naughty friend mimmicking and spoke colloquially.
By the time I realized I asked the blasphemous phone question, he was
taken back
I hope that day he wasn't sad thinking that his grandson hadn't stored
his contact.
09-02
c.Ɔ_o o o7
( ) | //\ /\
¯˜ ╱| |\ |\
|------ c.Ɔ |------ |------
| ( ) | |
|______ `¯ |______ |______
| | |
| | |
o | - o | '* ' |
\¸ | - /\¸ | ` < > ´ |
() | - ()\ () | _)o/_/() |
if you were the cyclist here, what would you do?
Although not same, here's the one. It was just before dawn and I was
drolling over the hovered clouds on the hills straight up ahead while
riding. Bam! a douchebag lady disposed the trash from the first floor
onto road, I didn't get hit but dodged a juice packet projectlie which
ended right on the middle of road. Continued straight for few seconds
before making an u-turn, stepped off the cycle and gave the packet a
hard kick; it landed right in front of her gate.
I was really furious and wasn't sure to control myself if eye contact
was made because this was the street I was litter picking, but I wish
she witnessed the kick; hard to miss the thud sound though.
Continued on the ride but that day was ruined afterwards
I should have brought the litter picker from home which was few meters
from that douchebags' and slung the whole trashbag+packet by transferr
ing momentum like a shotput-er, smashing her 1st floor bedroom window
and making a headshot to put some senses into her brain.
damn it's not an ideal world!
09-01
I had been fascinated with bus trips especially the ones that goes
to every remote village on the way instead of point-point, scenaries
are fresh but the main aspect is forceful evasdropping of copassengers
and taking a glimpse of their daily life. I planned on one such trip
on a whim after seeing a recycling centre listing, it was a tech city
in nearby state. I was dropped by family on the town's bus stand with
in few hours because I planned all this coinciding the outing. I was
on vaccation and a distinct cousin of ma lived there so convincing was
easy.
Forward trip was boring because, the moment I stepped into the bus sta
nd I saw point-point bus, as stubborn I could be I waited another 2hrs
till midnight and got into the similar bus. Task there went good; Resc
ued 2 X201 for $, which I still daily drive. On the return strip, I st
arted on morning taking a local bus to city outskirts then onto inter
state and 2 transits to hometown.
I prefer backrow despite the bumpy rides cause I could stretch legs
all the way till goods space which is usually empty on these buses.
Interstate one was filled, but I managed to sit near a 70-80 year old
man. He was streaming a movie on his 2inch phone! no complaints I was
pocketing a similar one too but without all this internet coolness. He
saw me peeking and offered to share the screen, phone was flipped with
holding dailpad horizontally. I tried to make sense of language but
the noise outside made it hard. We parted with a simile after entering
my state.
It was midday and unlike the previous, only 3/10 was filled in backrow
even the highways were scarce with vechicles; ideal for immersing into
thoughts. I didn't notice a copassanger untill a call he answered,
apparently it was from his wife asking what happened? - his friend
commited suicide by hanging and he stayed there to sort all the things
with family; he was in tears and tried containing anger while reciting
I just blinked and let the mid-30s man alone in bloddy eyes.
Reached a bigger town on evening; a final transit bus to my hometown
There were quite a few lined up for depature, picked one at random
surprise! myself and last copassanger were sitting in backrow, exact
postion. Later I learned while getting ticket from conductor he was
going to a town just before mine, I was thinking the whole time to
consolidate with some quotes or chat but When the bus stopped for the
mid trip break, saw him shift to an another bus that's about to go and
I just went out for air with regret of not uttering a word to man who
was letting go of emotion in public. Bus restarted after 30min and
reached home just before midnight.
I couldn't see myself doing these public rides in this present world
never thought it would become a thing of a past era. Cycling to my
rescue now!
08-31
A treat for end of the month, one of the earliest ascii collages I
made. Published on a mailing list when discussion about ascii art for
explaining programming popped up. Ofcourse I didn't dive off creating
my own, there were 2 miniatures I borrowed
|
2 _ _ | .-----------------.
d | 1 | | | Witch of Agnesi |
--- | -------------- | | | on a unit +-------------+
2 | / 2 \ | | | ˛---. | Start Here! |
dx | | 1 + x | | | | / ╲ +------+------+
|_ \ / _| | | L · j | |
0 | | \ ╱ | .---+------.
/ _.--. | | `---´ | | Place |
| f(x) * dx = ---´ ', | | Inflection | | Holders |
/ ___ | | | plot | |are really|
-1/ \| 3 \|/ | `-----------------' | tough |
__v==c. ' | _===__. `----------'
____v==/~~ '\. | v~ '~~===____.
~~~~~~~------------------'i------+-------/------------------'~~~~~~~~\
!._(_)_| v` _
\_)_(_| i` .' `-. _
W (,,.----------------. t(_)_| / /~\ / -¯`-. \|
| d`o| Sucked into | 'i_(_| / C oo * | ' `-oD8
c--(_| Flatland, | \_)_| i¯ _( ^) `.__: /|
| ( | Lost & | t(_| / / ~\ +--------+ ¯
PhS | Asciilarious | 'i_|/ --Keely-----|Hey-Pal!|--------
`----------------' '=/ | Dirac |
_ | _ +--------+ \~/
| / \ \ | | * oo D
| | i * (|) | - m | (_|_) = 0 )^ (_
|_ \ | / _| | \~ /
08-30
There are times when I doze off all day but still feel accomplished
and productive. Nice manipulation!
2 days back I wrote on smell memory. After a quick dive I found there
is dedicated discipline olfactory - to record scent, what a strange
sounding name. Main aim is to cash alongside augmented media but work
still seems to be under way. Damn ask Maude from 'Harold and Maude
(1971)' how she diy-ed it!
08-29
On my usual cycle route, there's a great view of a banyan tree on the
top of flyover. If I start the trip at 5am sprinting I reach the spot
after 10mins. At the hint of pale blue in pitch black sky with the day
light emerging from the hills behind, bats start returning to their
banyan home. It was scary at first with bat flocks hovering over my
head but soon got used to observing with still head; avoiding rabies
kisses. By the time more than half the flock of bats reaches the ban
yan, criping of birds start indicating their shared home quota for the
night was over; all these are synced within 15min
.> < .-, <¸
'>° ,( )-,_ °<'
o ,-.( .- . ')_
¸\\ > .( ( ( _) ), >
()|() ˝>° ( || )
----. < ¯-|-||_| | / /|.·-|¯
\ | l| | v' / | |
`, l | | | | l
'-, l j ~l |
\ / \
¯`·- ¸·- ¸ _ _ _
`._ ¯ )
· - , _ ·´
There used to be lake infront of this banyan but over the years it's
depth has been decreased and the bank is now filled with plastics! On
my way back I pass through another banyan tree and a temple under it
this is on the sides of service road.
No matter where the banyan is, staying under it even fo a minute gives
me a sense of peace.
08-28
I was going through daily chores which is sitting idle and suddenly
remembered a peculiar smell, was nowhere near any things that give it
off. These sort of hinting occurs at random times to me and the smells
itself have a story, a place and a past ingrained to it strongly.
This time though it was streets of Pusan and I believe I picked up on
the flower-ish scent on a mattress storefront. It was first night of
arrival in foreign country. Lights were buzzing on stores and apartme
nts as taxis was on the way to rental home. That mattress shop was the
first stop, it was almost closing time we-family brought quilt and pil
lows; later I was sitting on rear seat very tired. My memories after
that faded away but I remember on the next morning stroll I was given
a similar smelling strawberry shake by pa. The depature date clashed
clased with my annual test and it was on my mind when travelling but
sudden change of scenary made me forget all that for months. Even then
I was sitting idle during weekdays as we-family sideloaded pa as he
was visting the university for work.
Ventured into something there ^
Oh the smells, another that strikes now is my pungent senior secondary
school dorm; it has to do with cleaning agent.
Btw I still have that quilt on my bed, if it was fresh piece on store
then it's almost 20years old now
Present Pusan I'm seeing on videos has changed much From early 2000s
it's same for all the cities on earth, isn't it?
08-27
When I'm reciting a past activity I soon jumble point of view s/I/you
it's under the assumption that someone reading is about to undertake
the same; In fact I have done the same here a couple of days back.
It gets really annoying-faking as an instructor and in reality differs
for each person so I'm boycotting 'you get to' in favour of 'I did X'
this wasn't very evident to me untill I came across a post with exact
above perks, hehe thanks alter ego stranger
08-26
I wonder how every doggos find shelter under heat and rain nowadays
there are no overhangs or space surrounding new buildings it's a
perfect square with 0 cms to spare moreover concrete is layed on top
of road to building edge - what, a zero soil policy?
In a country where humans are finding road pavement as cozy bedroom
it's not surprising for doggos to squeeze, atleast this isn't the case
with pack around this vicinity.
08-25
I was brushing basics on space curves and polar systems, took a close
look on TNB frames of accelation.
\o/ made it!
finish /\┤
/ _/ \
,·´ / \
l ───────────────→ / \
╰-, project this onto /
\ a steep hill /
start
the first path is bird eye view, imagine you are walking forward
along this; you can keep the head straight and either walk straight
or sideways - corresponding former acceleration is Tangential, latter
being Normal
now project the path onto different terrain - a steep hill. Although
the traced path is same, as you move forward you start to gain altit
-ude and body twists with respect to ground accomadating ascent, not
like old video games where you kiss the hill always with just legs
moving. This twist is in perpendicular plane to both directions in
first case and acceleration associated is Binormal
let's tackle a real life situation. Riding on a corner, what do you do
you do to stay along? ofcourse steer maintaining a constant _
speed. Normal acceleration is what deals how fast swaying .─˙ .─╶
sideways changes with amount of steer. The full picture ,· ,·
╱ ╱
accel_normal = curvature × (velocity)² ↑
attacking a corner
steering increases curvature of path linearly but doubling velocity
quadruples the swaying! so next time when cornering slow down or
maintain the speed as usual at start and while on attacking the corner
pump a teeeny bit and steer less - very handy for non power steering
vechicles.
on pro cycling/skating track,s corners are banked/elevated at a angle
where gravity helps to sway. Also in these cases binormal acceleration
is different for each path, one closer to inner edge has maximal bi
normal acceleration(?) due to less steepness but banking help from
gravity is minimal. Gamble on the riders
08-24
Sleash's (dis)comfort is broken finally, let me lay my how-to.
start a timer at midnight 12, a daily cron job for xtimer will do now
fix how much free time you're allotting to the day - includes daily
chore and anything that only resembles consumption; if that number is
13, that's 13hrs of nothingness! awesome
now pause the timer whenever there's work/reading being done and make
sure by end of day around 9-10pm, the timer is behind the number. By
above example you would have progressed close to 11hrs!
why this works? since you can pause timer whenever there's some thing
done, you get the fake sense of controlling the time your self and
when you stray away, the guilt will poke you even mid day because of
the time constrain
from my trails, the best way is to pause the timer around 5 ie waking
before 5 and going into production, that's gives optimism later duing
day, since 13-5=8hrs of nothingness in the daylight! and doubt I have
done anything worthy after 8pm so I go lenient after that, calling it
a day.
my timer now is about to reach 18 (11pm now), quite a progress compari
ng yesterday
I do believe this works for night owls too with an offset in resetting
at midnight 12 - maybe 12 noon
08-23
I stumbled on a cycling manga - bikings by Jun Fudo, initial set
up was very honest, similarity to hajime no ippo really stricks
mc here is s/ippo/itto ipponogi, conincidence?
the bikes mentioned were real, early 2000s steel ·¯`
frames, straight geometry and art made me droll o__|/¯`
even info on frame setup and parts were drawn
at end of few chapters, sponsored? while reading dare disrupt
I thought a hill climbling technique was bluff my sleep
tested it on my short night ride today, fatigue cadence
throught the thigh and legs were more apparent than
my past 20km rides! racing and time trial were ballgame level
different than my endurance rides - 20km pun
here's the technique, change to reasonable inner lower gears and
imagine pushing the pedal with thigh bottom instead of foot heal
pick a straight course and pump the pedal as fast as you can.
On the way back alternate with single leg, I can only make 3/4
-ish with slippers. I was panting when I reached home street but
2 doggos I know were running ahead cheering, pumped one last time
and breeze in hair was awesome. I did feed them before egg rice
so not for food hehe
oh sleash cycle, I did get away from it - doesn't look like with
above description? atleast partially..
08-22
There's a sense of guilt that struck only at end of the day, reminding
planned things aren't complete yet. Keeping away from sleep as well as
progressing, ending with yet another late night and getting on this
(sl)eep-(ea)t-shi(th) cycle again the next day
o_ o .·¯¯¯¯·, o
/`·./\ \`/ 88 / ¸´·╮
a morning pose? ·`-----·´ ╰´ '
pisces on table °
DownLoading...
I'm a fallen victim to this infamous sleash cycle for 4 days I do know
multiple way outs, testing it tomorrow.
yesterday I reminded family about month off from chewing quaterly anti
helmintics tablets, came across a smithsonian artilce about excavated
15th century monks with proper sanitation had twice the worm infection
than the regular mass, analyzed from unhatched worm eggs on skeletal
remains! why so? hint hint smelly fertilizer
08-21
After a tedious thinking for few nights, I have decided how to re
ssurrect this year old space. One major thing that drove me away
was the replication of www. Why would these small webs
need indexed pods, holes for each post, in the world /\ .___¸
of www it's makes sense for web crawlers to snatch o/__|/\
single page instead of century long life dairy but \/ `-
aren't these small webs trying to achieve the
opposite? over the years I have made ascii arts, collages some
were purged on mailings lists others reside deep, few cool ones
have lost to disk failures.
In the upcomings day I will be squeezing all (un)interesting
things/people into this one plain txt and try to engage myself
+friends