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Title: RNC/DNC 2009
Subtitle: Document One
Date: May 5, 2009
Source: Retrieved on 9<sup>th</sup> November 2020 from [[https://crimethinc.com/2009/05/05/rncdnc-2009-document-one][crimethinc.com]]
Authors: CrimethInc.
Topics: RNC 2008, DNC, St. Paul
Published: 2020-11-09 12:05:58Z

<strong><em>This is what I always meant by “ambitious hedonism.”</em></strong>

<strong>I’ve been looking for any excuse to be with you.</strong> I am so glad to see you here in St. Paul.

<br>

It’s been too long.

What started as *idle flirtation* has become *full blown lust*. To be honest, sometimes I can’t get you out of my head. Your energy and smile, *the way your body moves with mine*. I remember the first time we looked each other in the eyes. You had a *spark*. I was hooked.

<strong>Why else</strong> would I have shown up to all those <strong>boring fucking meetings</strong>? Why else would I sit around outside dumpsters late at night, hoping you’d appear? I used to see you everywhere—the potluck, the shows, the <strong>street parties</strong>. But once all those <strong>fell apart</strong> we completely lost touch…

I can’t remember the last time I’ve seen you like this, a bandana on your face and a scowl in your eyes. My old, familiar *instincts* return at the sight of you.

<br>

I can tell you *exactly* how many times I’ve *dreamed* of this moment.

No, let’s *forget the past*, now that we’re both together…

<br>

My heart is beating through my chest. *I feel alive again*.

<br>

<strong>Something real is happening.</strong>

To be honest, I’m *terrified*, but I’m not afraid of arrest or pain. What really scares me is the possibility of missing out on these moments with you. Not taking *enough* chances. Not pushing ourselves to take the risks *we know are within our abilities*.

What is it we are hoping for? Why *exactly* are we here?

If I can *shred all inhibitions* with your eyes on me,

<br>

can I do the same before the eyes of a thousand pigs and friends?

If we can *trust our desires* when you’re in my arms,

<br>

will it help us to do the same when you’re in the arms of the pigs?

<strong>Your grip</strong> on my wrists has always been strong, but you always stop when I say to.

<br>

If we find ourselves in this compromising position this week, *please god don’t let go*.

<br>

I only enjoy handcuffs with you.

We know how to keep secrets. You’ve allowed me to be myself like no one else has. I am excited by the chance to *share our bodies* with all these people. I want to push myself beyond the brink, beyond my own fears and hesitations. I want to *turn the world upside down* and *show those motherfuckers* we’ve finally gone past the point of no return

<br>

<strong>and we’re taking their whole rotten system with us.</strong>

Before we go out this morning, *kiss me* like I’ll never see you again.

While we’re *separated*… whenever I’m in *danger*… whenever I’m in *ecstasy*…

<br>

<strong>I’ll be thinking of you.</strong>

<em>— from a handbill distributed anonymously at the convergence center in St. Paul in the days leading up to the RNC</em>

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