💾 Archived View for claire.flounder.online › writing › web2.0.gmi captured on 2023-06-16 at 15:57:35. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
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I’m a member of Gen Z, and I’ve spent most of my life on the Internet. When I first logged on to the Internet, when I was four (which is disgusting in its own right), I was so amazed by it. There were so many different websites and there was so much to do! And you could talk to people all around the world! How amazing.
The sense of awe I felt then is so depressing now twenty years later, when all that promise feels like it’s been squandered by corporate consolidation and the tech industry. It was always going to be that way I guess, but the way it happened just feels bad. The new Reddit API rules mean that the only acceptable way of using Reddit (for me) has been taken away, just so the owners can make 10 cents more per share so they can cash out. I didn’t expect me to be so heated about this, but I think I’ve been feeling this way for a long time, and it’s just all bubbling over. I hate the five website that constitute the Internet. I hate how boring the Internet has become. The enshittification, the disrespectful design, the attention economy, all of it has burnt me out and ironically had the opposite effect that app creators were expecting.
The Internet these days just feels like we’ve been relegated to a McDonald’s play place. You have to sit in the sticky, plastic chairs that everyone else has sat in while you eat your shitty double cheeseburger. It’s hot, it’s stuffy, it’s *gross,* and you want to leave but you can’t because all your friends seem perfectly fine putting up with this dog shit. And because you don’t want to become a social pariah, you have to sit there too and pretend like you’re okay with it.
Is this all there is? Is there not a more dignified way to exist online? It’s just depressing that it’s come to this (even if it was inevitable). I wasn’t even necessarily feeling like this a few months ago, but this Reddit thing has been the straw that broke the camel’s back for me. I’m just so sick of paying with my attention. I’m sick of the red badges, and the ads, and the number of things *screaming* for me to look at them, look at them, look at them! It’s like being a teacher and every fucking kid is raising their hand. It’s stressful! I don’t want to be a part of it anymore!
When Apollo goes down, I am going to embark on the 30-day declutter mentioned in Cal Newport’s *Digital Minimalism,* and I hope it will give me a clear enough head for me to decide what I want the Internet to be for myself. I don’t want to just completely never use the Internet ever again—there’s too much good mixed up with too much shit.
I’ve been looking more and more about paying for access to user interfaces that are not absolutely awful. Which I hate that I would have to do, but I can afford it, so why not? Fuck, I’ve even been considering paying for a higher quality *search engine,* because Google has gone so far down the shitter.
If I go back to the way I was, it will literally only be because I am addicted. It’s not because I get pleasure out of this, it’s not because I find the Internet interesting, and it’s not because I *want* to be here.
And I love the good things about the Internet, don’t get me wrong. I’ve made so many real, genuine connections with people from all around the world. It’s made so many things so convenient. It’s also opened my eyes to new ways of living, new ways of thinking, new things to be interested in. So the Internet has always brought good things to me. I just feel like in the past few years, that experience has gotten so much flatter, and I just feel ready to move on to a different mode of existing on the Internet. I’m not sure if anyone else can relate, but I just feel like my standards for what I want to consume, to take in, are just higher these days, and the five websites don’t do it for me anymore. I’m nervous that I won’t be able to break the habit, but I’m also excited by the prospect of moving towards a different way of existing, both on the Internet and in real life. Again, I’m not sure if anyone else can relate, but this felt cathartic to type out and get off my chest.