💾 Archived View for spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › humor › german.aut captured on 2023-06-14 at 17:10:36.
-=-=-=-=-=-=-
Article 1629 of eunet.jokes:
Path: santra!tut!draken!kth!enea!mcvax!ukc!etive!glasgow!singleto
From: singleto@cs.glasgow.ac.uk (Jon Singleton)
Newsgroups: eunet.jokes
Subject: ENGLISH/GERMAN MOTORING TERMS
Summary: appologies in advance to any germans offended.
Message-ID: <2212@crete.cs.glasgow.ac.uk>
Date: 16 Jan 89 10:19:47 GMT
Reply-To: singleto@cs.glasgow.ac.uk (Jon Singleton)
Organization: Comp Sci, Glasgow Univ, Scotland
Lines: 98
This is an english/german dictionary of motoring terms(non-serious,this is
eunet.jokes remember).
The reason german was selected was because when they don't have an
existing word they can sometimes assemble a new one from bits they already
have.Therefore non-british people who speak english should pronounce the
german phonetically.
I would like to appologise to any germans offended by this gross misuse of
their language,but its all done in the best possible taste.
P.S. "Don't mention the war" - Basil Fawlty,Fawlty Towers. c.BBC 1975
INDICATORS Die Blinkenleiten Tickentocken
BONNET Pullnob und Knucklechoppen
EXHAUST Spitzenpoppenhangentuben
SPEEDOMETER Der Egobooster und Linenshooter
CLUTCH Die Kuplink mit achlippen und schaken
PUNCTURE Die Phlatt mit Bludyfucken
LEARNER Die Twatten mit Elplate
ESTATE CAR Der Bagzeroomfurshagginaute
PARKING METER Der tennarpinscher und Zlochenarr
WINDSCREEN WIPER Der flippenflappenmuckenschpredder
POWER BRAKES Der edbangeronvinschreen stoppenquick
GEAR LEVER Biggensticken fur Kangaroochoppen
FUEL GAUGE Der Walletemptyung Meter
BREATHALYSER Die Puffitinter fur Pistenarsen
REAR VIEW MIRROR Der Yonkunter ist Tooklosan
SEAT BELT Der klunkenklikken frauleinstrapper
HEADLIGHTS Das Dippendontdazzelubasted
EXHAUST FUMES Die Koffundschplitterpoluter
HIGHWAY CODE Der Wipen fur Arsen
FOG WARNING Die Puttenklogdownan und Fukkitt
TRAFFIC JAM Die Bluddifuckin Dammundblast
REAR SEAT Der Schpringentester
TYRES Flatfahrts
BACKFIRE Der Lowdenbangermekkenjumpen
JUGGERNAUT Der Fukkengratt Trukken
ACCIDENT Das Bleedinkmess
NEAR ACCIDENT Der Phewn Near Schittenselfen
GARAGE Der Hieway Robberung
CYCLIST Der Peddallpushink Pilloken
SKID Die Bannanen Waltzen
DOUBLE WHITE LINES Overtaken und Krunchen.
---- Thanks to all those who replied to "COMPANY CARS",much appreciated.
I hope you like this latest offering courtesy of 'Ygorra',the
Glasgow University Rag Mag.
Again, my appologies to any Germans offended by this misappropriation
of their language.I can incidentally speak German:
Entschuldigen sie bitte,ich bin sehr sehr sorry!
- DIRTY HARRY
(Its a 'sudden impact' when you finally get the joke.)
--