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/ YOU KNOW IT'S A BAD DAY... \
< by: >
\ Red Phantom /
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We've all had our bad days. But exactly just HOW bad it is has been
undeterminable, until now. If you THINK that you've had a bad day, compare it
with the following guidelines for a bad day.
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YOU KNOW IT'S A BAD DAY WHEN...
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You try to dry your hair in a microwave oven.
Your little sister tries to flush a bannana down the toilet.
You lose the piece of paper where you had your passwords written.
You remember that you accidently threw out the piece of paper with all your
passwords on it, and you have to rummage through 5 feet of garbage to look
for it.
After looking through the garbage for an hour, you realize that you have a
text file of your passwords saved to disk.
You forget to turn the computer off before you start messing around with the
inside of it.
Your air conditioner breaks down right in the middle of a heat wave.
You accidently burn a whole in the floor during Chemistry Lab.
You feel like listening to an ABBA album.
You seal an envelope before you put in the letter.
The radio station you're listening to starts playing the new song by George
Michael and Elton John.
You destroy your radio because it started playing the new song by George
Michael and Elton John.
You remember that you payed $150 for the radio which you just destroyed.
You forget to turn off your computer while you're away for the weekend.
Your car runs out of gas while you're driving in the South Side of Chicago late
at night.
You forget to study for a final exam.
Your car gets stalled at a railroad crossing.
Your disk drive starts to smoke when you turn on your computer.
You get your access lowered on a BBS.
You taste 40% Bran Flakes, and find out that you LIKE THEM!
You go to school and wait outside for two hours before you realize it's
Saturday.
You cram four hours for a test that you think will be given tomorrow, but
you find out that it will be a week from tomorrow.
You find out that you are not a cool dude.
You have to boot 200+ disks to look for a particular program.
You try to look straight into an eclipse.
You accidently enter a gay bar.
Your passwords all get deleted because you forget to tell the sysops that
you were going on vacation for the summer.
You get expelled from school.
You attempt to extinguish a grease fire by pouring water on it.
Your car has a full tank, but still doesn't run.
You remember that, although your car only takes unleaded gas, you filled it
up with regular.
Someone else has used your handle while you were out of town, and has ruined
your reputation.
You begin to post a message but forgot what you wanted to post about.
You hear the song by Elton John and George Michael so many times that you
start to like it.
You forget to adjust your clock for Daylight Savings Time and arrive at
school an hour late.
You see it begin to rain, and remember that you forgot to put the top up on
your convertible.
You try to boot a disk for 5 minutes, and wonder why it isn't working.
You open your drive and find out that you put the disk in sideways.
You realize that your disk drive head is probably ruined by now.
You get Dead or Alive's "Youthquake" album as a present.
You become sick to your stomach after getting a certain album as a present.
Your furnace breaks down when it's 30 degrees below zero outside.
You find out that you are blocking against William Perry in Sunday's Bears
game.
You try to lick the third rail on an "El" platform.
You see a text file that you wrote with someone else's name on it.
You find out that you're going south for the winter---to Antarctica.
You forget to take the garbage out, and it has to sit there for another week.
You attempt to eat a Frozen T.V. Dinner without cooking it.
You find out that your friend tried to sharpen a pen in your $80 electric
pencil sharpener.
You buy a 10 megabyte hard drive and find out that it won't work with your
motherboard.
Your little brother thinks that your floppies are 45" singles and tries to
play them on the stereo.
You accidently initalize the disk with your software list on it, and have to
boot up 200+ disks to redo it.
You find out that you have to read a 500 page novel in two days.
You try to use a hair dryer while still in the shower in order to "save time."
You find out that you are having a bad day.
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# of Guidelines Your day's
you match with: ranking:
=============== ==========
50 You've had a helluva
day. Go to sleep.
40 You've had a real bad
day.
30 You've had a somehwat
rough day...now it's
Miller Time.
20 and lower Consider yourself
lucky!
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A man who gives "Dear Abby" advice---
(] Red Phantom [)
[11-17-85]
[TMB] Which (1-81 ?,<CR>)two days.
You try to use a hair dryer while still in the shower in order to "save time."
You find out that you are having a bad day.
::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
# of Guidelines Your day's
you match with: ranking:
=============== ==========
50 You've had a helluva
day. Go to sleep.
40 You've had a real bad
day.
30 You've had a somehwat
rough day...now it's
Miller Time.
20 and lower Consider yourself
lucky!
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A man who gives "Dear Abby" advice---