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AN ELECTRONIC CHRISTMAS/CHANUKAH CARD TO ALL Lyrics by Evan Leibovitch, code by Beverly Erlebacher Dedicated to anyone who's left their computers alone just long enough for them to self-destruct: (Sung to the tune of something or other...) On the first day I left it, my Unix gave to me: A burnt-out V.D.T. On the second day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the third day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the fourth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the fifth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the sixth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the seventh day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Seven blown partitions; Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the eighth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Eight gettys dying; Seven blown partitions; Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the ninth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Nine floppies frying; Eight gettys dying; Seven blown partitions; Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the tenth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Ten ports a-jamming; Nine floppies frying; Eight gettys dying; Seven blown partitions; Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the eleventh day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Eleven chips a-smoking; Ten ports a-jamming; Nine floppies frying; Eight gettys dying; Seven blown partitions; Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the twelfth day I left it, my Unix gave to me: Twelve boards a-blowing; Eleven chips a-smoking; Ten ports a-jamming; Nine floppies frying; Eight gettys dying; Seven blown partitions; Six bad controllers; Five core dumps; Four bad blocks; Three heads crashed; Two faulty tapes; And a burnt-out V.D.T. On the thirteenth day I started adapting my Nintendo for the VME bus.