💾 Archived View for spam.works › mirrors › textfiles › fun › farfel-1.txt captured on 2023-06-14 at 16:36:34.
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this contains no caps in the begining of the sentences. farfel odditys this is a series that i will try to continue once a month or the amount of stupid things this person dose that i am writing about. the farfel (introduction) the farfel is a weird and uniqly diffrent in his stupidity from others. (background) the farfel moved into my neighborhood about a year and a half ago and as acted stupid since.with dumb and some of the weirdest things that i have ever seen on the face of the. situation 1 the farfel has had a lot of dumb things happen to him but i will try to pick out the best (not very hard) . the farfel is the type of person that looks like a walking ball of hair. his (half brother i strees it greatly) his hair is never combed and his explination is that he dosen't have warsh and ware hair. his room is hell on earth. walking into his room is not a good idea. first of all the stench is so bad that it will make you almost tear. there is a little trail in the middle of the room with about six inches of junk (basicly food cups papper nintendo games dirt,dirt,dirt socks shirts underware pants and just about everything else) on the floor. this path goes strait into the middle of the room to the tv around the bed and nowhere else. the reasonthe path goes to the tv is as follows. he is a person that is almost or is fourteen years old in seventh grade. he comes home runs from the bus stop to the mail box as fast as he can ( the way he runs is unexplainable) to just get the mail. according to him anything that says esident is his because it starts with "r" and so dose his name (robert). if theres nothing else for him he takes it into his room and it dissapears or he leaves it where no one would look for it. some tims he will even take some of my freinds cd's (god only knows for what reason he dosen't own a cd player. except for this peice of crap tap player that he found in the trash up the street. he goes inside and makes his first snack of the day (#1). takes the phone and goes downstairs and turns on the tv. which will be on for the rest of the day. this kid consentrates so much on tv that the world dissapears to him he cant hear anything else going on. when the phone rings he dosen't awnser because like i said he dosen't hear any thing. about an hour after getting home he'll go back upstairs to get another snack (#2). which wold probaly be the rest of the bag of potato chips which would be half full. going back downstairs to watch mighty morphine power rangers and super samiri warriors, and don't forget the vr troopers. he also has the power ranger window stickers pens posters and hangs the boardings to his door. then my freind will come home around work at six o'clock. the farfel jumps up out of his bed and runs to his door saying mommy? he'll do this to anyone else that walks threw the door and calls on the phone. his mom ( not putting her down she's kind cool) raised him like a little girl! once for christmas she bought him a easy- bake oven. and this christmas he asked for some sort of sewing machine. every hour on the hour or half hour he will go and get other snacks. if in the morning his mom wasen't there this kid would look like well a farfel in the morning going to school. 1 he would probally where red sweat pants with a green shirt that has dirt marks all over it. she has to wake him up an hour to two hours early and he still will not be ready in time to go to school. he would not brush his teeth or take shower or any thing he would probaly just end up sitting in front of the tv in some sort of trance for the rest of the day even. now he also dose some things when my freind isn't home. 1)he will go into his room and go threw everything and not put it back the way it was. he'll go threw my freinds video tapes and leave one laying in the middle of the floor. 2)he will go threw my freind beauro desk you name it and he's gone threw it. (dinner) now so you can understand this part i must tell you somthing else. now were kinda positive that the farfel is gay ( no offense). he has muscle magazines laying in the middle of his floor. he saves the boxes to his speedo underware and keeps them in his room. sometimes he'll leave his door open during the day. not a pretty sight when you look in but . sometimes you can see him what we call farfeling himself. he realy takes his fingers ( gross part you shouldn't read) and puts them down his pants and what looks like up his but (i'm going to hurl now).now to the dinner part. my freind has two real sister and they make fun of the farfel at dinner when his mom is not there. durring diner they start calling him a farfel and saying like how he takes his fingers and shoves them up his but. my freinds real dad dosen't care thet they say this he even tries o hold back his laugh. the farfel eats like a baby that Knows how to shove food into their mouth but not chew. spageti , put it on his plate half will be in his stomach and the other on his face. one time when i was eating pizza he ate three peices befor i was done with two peices. when he eats he makes this anoying slurping noise but without soup. his reason for this is that he dosen' get enough food into his mouth because it keeps falling off his fork. of course it couldnt be that he tries to shove it into his mouth so fast. and it all falls off on the way there. well thats all this time wait until next week and there will be more. james.