💾 Archived View for gemini.hackers.town › Wetdryvac › poetry › 00371_In_Line.txt captured on 2023-06-14 at 15:46:44.
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=====> VacHaus provisionals <=====
/ / a TNtD (Try Not to Die) drop \\
A Poetry tDrop
by Wetdryvac
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In Line
June 15, 1992
they ��d none of them wanted to die
I knew that ��
my parents had none the less gone in the end
fighting, struggling all the way ��
so I supposed I ��d one day go
it was the way of all my family to fight death
yet now I look at these walls
dank and moistened as they are ��
death does not seem the evil it once portrayed
I guess I could claim death as my friend now
or at least a close acquaintance ��
so many I know have been welcomed while I watch
it ��s not as hard as it used to be
a while ago I couldn ��t stop crying, raging
I ��d strike out at my guards though I knew futility
laughter at the child ��s hands
I can still read the numbers on my arms
they define me now
calling me to labor, feeding
a good day when I remember my name
I used to dream of freedom
I would sit late and think green bowers
too tired to sit late any more
on the other side of these fences lies gray rock
damp and familiar as my stall
free, I don ��t know what I ��d do
maybe just sleep forever
older, thinner, it ��s hard to think of much else
death is a way of escaping, even that feared leisure
more than acquaintance now, close friend
it ��s become sin of envy now
lionizing the dead �� I guess that means I ��m winning
what ��s to hope for, rust on the cross?
they polish right back every hour ��
and breaking rocks, they have a dormant machine
two wheels twelve yards wide
our labor is a sham
how strange the world
I guess if I thought about it hard enough I ��d want again to be free
I don ��t really know what looking forward would raise for desire
maybe a chance to find if I still had brothers
but all our commonalities date back to this sick place
maybe a chance to reminisce, make brave heroes of parents
looking forward to that �� it ��s a jest, justification for giving in
no dreams any more, nor thoughts of some tremulous good in the world
the sort of fey dreaming children work in
it just doesn ��t make sense that everything comes down ��
to a bed, a number �� endless days of shouting and labor
it ��s all abuse anyway, but I ��m not bothered as I was
just going through the motions
I suppose I ��ll look back years from now, find these terrible things
aghast that I ��d stopped fighting
after all, some temple day we ��ll remember the wrong
I know somewhere there ��s a plague, or memory of solstice
but now, live with my relevant features, drink the shallow soup
flick the bits of metal and self away �� iron at a guess
some day others will speak of hell
strange land where humans become gradual desecration
corpses walking narrow roads, waiting to die
remembering how the whip felt, how it only makes a sound now
once recollection of home fires �� popping knots in logs
and the rest, step, fall, join the bull work
there is no mechanism any more
I don ��t even fool myself to slavery anymore
logic claiming change comes, daily intellect denied
I just wait day to day, older, thinner
and death will be my friend, reassurance in some guard ��s eyes
some mornings when the guards cry
I ��m not frightened any more �� we ��re all mechanism now
just tired of this, and perhaps my fellow ��s bony hand
will sanction my last breath
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With thanks to the good folks at Hackers.Town for answering the very
n00best of questions, with the following people politely [REDACTED].
May your time go in a manner you consent to.
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IRC [REDACTED]
Poetry, Short Form, With Contact https://writing.exchange/@wetdryvac
Poetry, Long Form, With Contact https://landofkittens.social/Wetdryvac
Web https://www.wetdryvac.net
KoFi https://ko-fi.com/wetdryvac
Links https://linktr.ee/wetdryvac
MATRIX [REDACTED]
BBS [REDACTED]
Primary mastodon residence, With Contact https://hackers.town/@Wetdryvac
All the other coms access points [REDACTED]
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