💾 Archived View for gemlog.blue › users › Hydrogensgirl › 1616536067.gmi captured on 2023-04-20 at 00:22:05. Gemini links have been rewritten to link to archived content
⬅️ Previous capture (2021-12-04)
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Well I guess this post is going to be one of many describing me and how I am as a human. We will start this one out with my story. You know the dark one that everyone has. And maybe at the end I’ll tell some of the deepest things about me, secret wise and such. But we have to start such a horrible story with a beautiful fact. Since this is such a long story I’ll give you two, just because I am generous like that. I love bright colors such as yellow and orange, but my favorite color is Coral and I love Starbucks. I love coffee in general but my personal opinion is that Starbucks is the best. I believe this so much I spent over thirty dollars on four mugs. Things between me and lover boy are going well. It has been discovered that we are both falling for each other rapidly. I’m getting closer and closer to him by the hour learning things about him and just enjoying the time we spend talking to each other. He gets annoyed occasionally with me but that’s to be expected because I’m a needy human. Without further adieu I’m Moon and this is my story.
When my mom and my dad conceived me my mom was still in school for nursing and my dad was already a nurse. From the stories I’ve heard they tried many years to have me, but failed. Before I was conceived the marriage was good. Once my mom became pregnant my dad started getting abusive and tried making my mom dependent on him, which didn’t work seeing as my mother is a strong resilient woman whom I looked up to most of my childhood. My dad had several bad mental health issues and refused to get help with them. My dad became more abusive after my mom had me. He tried killing me when I was first crawling as my mom watched. I would later find out I’m not his first child. My mom filed for divorce when I was three. My dad left us 87 cents in the bank account and took major items of the home such as the washer, dryer, and lawn mower. My mom was still in school because she refused to depend on a man at the time. We stayed with my my grandparents and my mom starved herself to make sure we had money for my food and diapers. I tried mending the relationship with my dad as I got older but to no avail. This is where I first started developing a fear for men.
My mom eventually got remarried to a man. We shall call him Steve for legal purposes. My mom and Steve have a good marriage. They conceived two more children and were very happy. For literary purposes you should know I started puberty way earlier then most girls. I was having my first periods at the age of 11. By the age of twelve Steve started sexually harassing and assaulting me. He then started to rape me. I made two cases against him but I never got anywhere with them and I was told if I did it again I would be placed in juvenile hall for my accusations. His actions never stopped and my family never believed me. My uncle would also sexually assault me, but I never told anyone about that. I had many older sexual partners at a young age trying to fill a void known as “daddy issues”. I had my first “real boyfriend” at 15 and he ended up being abusive, which I was already used to since my sexual partners were usually abusive as well. We ended up splitting because I denied him sex one to many times. I had my second boyfriend at the age of 16. We never had sex, I refused to go down that trail again. He ended up cheating on me a total of 27 known times in the span of 4 months. He also had gotten my best friend pregnant which is one of the many reasons I no longer have friends. I tried becoming bisexual or whatever you’d like to call it, but quickly realized it wasn’t for me. That’s pretty much my story leading up to now. All I do is read, work, write, and do school. Well and as of late talk to my lover boy. He’s really special. I hope you all know he means to world to me already.
Until next time.
~moon