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flounder is dropbox, dump of older stuff i mite put in the zine

--

--

ten children lined up all the exact same height

the lafayette soccer volunteer is in the stands today, at the

top of the bleachers behind two tall men in t-shirts

the eleventh child, the goalee, eats her snack out of a little brown bag,scarfing an apple slice down in two bites

the team is too small,there have been no opportunities for substitutes,they have been out on the field every one of them for an hour and a half,chasing the ball down with grim animal vigor without thought for strategy,ten children trailing the ball like comet tail, carving the ball's path into the earth with spiked feet so that a dirt trail crisscrosses the field turf like a lazy looping pen draws across a page

so evenly matched,never a shot taken, so the goalees stand like two eternal sentries until death, aging 1 year every minute into adulthood into old age into statue, fossilizing and sifting out into walls that span the entire goal line, the beginnings of a labyrinth built across ages the length of a million universes

--

the lafayette soccer volunteer

dreams of walking around different sized orange cones

the little round almost flat ones

the classic cone - infant-tall

and the big ones - the hefties

--

rounded plastic edge of an old phone

light blinking in a parking garage

looking into the window of a parked car and seeing things there

bend down and put your eye level with blacktop

see air squirm and rocks small enough to be sand shifting

concrete like putty, hard look of a cement pourer

the voice coming out of a speaker across sunworn playgrounds

boot kicking a bright shining key across the floor

and keys flash like smiles

you and i have had the sun burn our eyes out from behind a post

--

finally,

ive walked up enough porch steps

to know how anticipation works

the teeth that make gears turn

peck me on the cheek

low wobbly sounds of heavy blankets

fold against the wind

that's because i'm very serious

with very dramatic lighting

and i've come up with an invention

for a device that would suck

going to the mall alone

to get my ears pierced at claire's

this guy in the massage chair blinks hard

at the wall where a tv is

spitstain bathroom window:

eyes expecting a mirror

mistake passing car

for features of my face

i have a bruise on my shin

the size of a dog's eye

eating leather and mud

old cans out of rotten cabinets

over and over

so that someday, everyone on earth will be

able to watch the sun set at the same time

time zones folding into each other one by one

and everyone i talk to on the phone

can hear my dog chewing on his bone

--

/kid has camera/

hi hi hi hi

oh he's not paying me ANY attention

OK so, okay

when you're feeling fuzzy

that (that's actually) movie theater floor

doubling over your vision's vision

um dad? dad?

smiling like animals would

if they did more often and had it practiced

--

charlotte had found herself a brand new beaux

he was an architect!

but there was one little issue:

he sucked

--

/for looking at water/

well it must be you

cuz i know that reflection all too well

no matter how bubbly

probably all the bad thoughts i have

are actually yours

so that about wraps it up!

hmm hmm hmm, these thoughts of yours,

they're pretty cynical?

my thoughts, on the other hand? great

oh my god, that kid just threw a rock!

oh my god, the rock smashed into the water!

jesus and mary, it busted right through

and hit the riverbed with a thud nobody heard

then a fish whizzed by

really fast

and and and then my eyes refocused,

and there you were!

--

dimple

wander scone rake lover trust keeper fablearm nice nonsense figure fate hopalong hip deny lock breaker vertical tall wonder raker river listen in morning

dull moon mirror light highlight walker lyer ruffle room low hum speaker

wrist runner liker lifer pristine ox fliterrer flake fate

--

mean height furniture rearranger

caspia muldoon drifter seeker lookalike banish death middleman green gust future failure smilepeople earth dream wild death, the world like a new one

cameratist

for my lookalike at the pulitzer

i'm sure that's old news

--

/josie's question/

tree a good color

josie's question

blue hand

moon thru window style

painting,

you look like me

tree color good?

but already the car's seat had pushed her

to a big building

--

march third

years into the national rope crisis

me, a rope of mean height, tied

to outdoor table of cafe

furniture rearranger,

that's future on the phone

handing him a "mind photo", well,

because everything's sad

since the dog was sick

this guy retied me to a pipe

near the alley where water

comes out of a hole

anyway,

just you wait

--

ok THANK YOU because

i genuinely

ok THANK YOU because

you, i thought:

look, *sits on edge of countertop*

i like the look of pigs in a blanket

when they are layed out on a cooking sheet

--

/scylla x charybdis/

on the darkweb

they're drawing me fucked by glaucus but

in the hallowed halls of deviantart.com

it's you and me baby

that dumbass poison was the best

fucking thing that ever happened to me

i have three dog dicks and

i can fucking slither and

i can fuck

remember when we met? you were

eating some argonauts, i was

drinking down the blood of a

confused old god who mistook this

stupid-ass strait for the fucking

river of life

we can't move, but we can sure as hell

cuber

i want to type out

every little thing i'm gonna do to that

whirlpool of yours

"shipping hazard" my ass

i've got your shipping hazard

right here

--

/knife 2 knife/

i got new glasses today. then i went to work. i always thought my jokes were funny. now i can see the slight downturns at the corners of their smiles and i know they're faking it.

so i gotta get better at comedy. i gotta work on my jokes and stuff.

"i got in a knife fight the other day," i say at the open mic. "thing about knives these days--"

"woo!" says someone.

"thing about knives these days," i say, "is they're so technological. everything's improving-- all this technology, improving every day, even the /knives/ are high tech these days."

"yeah!" somebody says.

"so i

get in this knife fight, this guy

comes at me with a knife

and i pull out the knife i've got in my jacket pocket, but we can't even fight yet, these are high tech knives, we've gotta sync them to each other.

knife 2 knife pairing."

.

but god. god? knife 2 knife pairing: ain't that a phrase that's been kicking around in my head... *sniffs, blows nowse* ...high tech knives, smart knives...

on the walk home, kicking a little tree burr down the sidewalk. we have smart phones but not smart knives? smart knives with apps on them and little buttons and sound effects: smart things? like how people make fun of when a toaster is smart but now a knife is smart? magical realism.

smart knifves hi ted, how are you today. //oh god don't try the knife stuff.//

new

glasses new

frowny corners on the lines of the mouth,, the laugh: ack ack ack! knife to knife to knife to knife, all the little knifes syncing up beeping and saying "PAIRED"

world chorus of slightly untimed PAIRED d-d-d-d-d-d-d-

i'm: scared to own a knife or buy a gun or get a taser(?) because i'm afraid of losing trust in society, like how i don't lock my doors and think those ring doorbells are one of the pillars of the deprecatous shit we've bought into am i correct?

..high tech knives with cute little lcd screens? making tamogatchi noises into those little speakers at the park that connect to one another and the noise comes out the other side? and i'd drink out of a dog bowl for a laugh but the idea of a little cute walking knife with heart eyes gives you cornerfrowns?

next week at the open mic, i will /refine/ the joke.

"i got in a knife fight last week," i'll say, "our knifes were so dag gum smart (technologically cumbersome) we couldn't even kill each other. and,

isn't that technology saving lives? ain't that the end of scaryville and the protoplasm of fucking fun town?"

--

/illin it in the krypt/

yeah, just me again here in the krypt. got my sandbag, got the old tornup gloves. love it here in the krypt.

puttin on my favorite playlist again. somethin to really get the blood pumpin. somethin with a beat thump thump thump, and rapid. some action movie montage shit. some final car chase shit. i listen to the music, i put the torn-up gloves on, i punch the fuckin sandbag.

ever seen a movie? that's how i wanna live. i hate seeing out of my dumbass eyes, single-perspective like. i want the world to cut shot to shot to shot. close up shots. far away shots. i want to walk into a building and get a view of the full fuckin building when i walk in, that's what they call an establishing shot. when you walk into the krypt, i put a picture over the door: a shot of the krypt my buddy took of the krypt with a drone. you can squint your eyes and block out your peripheral vision and focus your view on only that picture above the door, and pretend you got your own little establishing shot right there.

i care about you. when you come into the krypt, well, you're walkin right into the mfin care zone. i got stuff in the fridge. cold drinks. refreshing shit. i got protein bars. you can sit on my tornup couch and watch me punch the sandbag. i'll let you pick the tunes. they gotta be thumpin, but i'll let you pick em.

"never punched a sandbag" you'll say

"you wanna try?" that's what i'll say. i'll rip the velcro off the tornup gloves, give em to you. "it's really simple shit. give it the one two. elbows up. follow through."

"wow" you say, punching the sandbag with my tornup gloves, "this is actually kinda fun."

and you're fckin right. it is fun. it's fun to work up a sweat. get fit. get that strength. i can lift up a car. i can pull the weight of a fckin eighteen-wheeler. you can't do that yet, but you'll get there. that's what i'm best at here in the gd dm krypt: i believe. i believe you can do it. i respect your work ethic. i fucking respect your willingness to put on the gloves and give it a shot.

i'm strong. ive been strong since birth. but when you're a kid, you don't know what to do with that strength. i kept accidentally crushing 7ups before i drank em. i had quadriceps to die for -- i would bury the other end of the seesaw into the fcking ground.

had to learn to believe in myself. put that strength somewhere. when i was eighteen i tripped over a sandbag. the rest is gd dm history.

now i'm just chillin in the krypt again. alone. but you'll be here soon. i've got a cold drink waitin for you. like a v8 or some shit. that healthy shit.