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LIST FILE ON MARGIN IS 80 STATUS: ALL ALLOWED NUMBER OF LINES: 629 1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask.... 2 ********************** REMOVED 11 FEB 84 ******************* 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION 6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privatly owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is 10 privatly owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which 11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be 12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the 14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the 15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace 16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 18 ************************************************************ 19 20 ************************************************* 21 A LITTLE ADDED NOTE TO THOSE WHO WERE INTERESTED IN MY BEAVER STORY 22 THE LITTLE PEST FINISHED OFF THE SHRUB, SO NOW IT IS GONE AND I WON'T 23 BE BOTHERED BY HIM ANY MORE. SIGH.. IF IT WASN'T FOR THE DAMAGE, I 24 WOULDN'T MIND HAVING HIM AROUND, BUT IT SEEMS THE ONLY REASON FOR 25 HIM TO STICK AROUND AT ALL IS TO DECIMATE MY POOR LITTLE SHRUB. 26 *********************** CISTOP MIKEY ************************* 27 Voyeur: Please be more careful about entering msgs. Somehow an Escape sequence 28 found its way into your msg. It is rather difficult to decipher a msg when my 29 terminal homes the cursor WITHOUT ERASING THE SCREEN! 30 In any case, there are three events listed in this month's issue of 31 The Crier. South Sound Tourney in Evercleare (Olympia, Tumwater, etc). 32 An Ithra session on Crusaders in Couer du Val (Corvallis). (Ithra is an SCA 33 unversity, sort of..) 34 Barbarian Brawl in Windrym (Lethbridge, Alberta). 35 I doubt that it was the Barbarian Brawl that you heard about. Note that this 36 list is FAR from complete. There may be many LOCAL events that didn't get sent 37 to The Crier. 38 If anyone wants more info, tell me where you live. (city, county, state). 39 I'll post the address & phone number of the Seneschal of the nearest branch of 40 the Society. 41 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 42 The Bard helped the piper back to his feet, and called for a CHAIR for his 43 friend. 44 ~~~~~~~~~ 45 I could have sworn that Pam planted a hawthorne, not a rowan. They ARE related 46 but... ah well, I think I shall sing of the rowan & then tell my tale. 47 48 Rowan Tree (words & music: Cynthia McQuillin) 49 Of all the trees that blossom beneath the sacred sun, 50 The fairest is the rowan tree, who wears a snow white crown. 51 The fairest is the rowan tree that sang me to may rest 52 With secret signs of power bare upon her breast. 53 By the rising of the sun. 54 The silver of the moon. 55 I know well what time will tell 56 Inscribed upon my doom. 57 For once beneath the rowan I took a sacred vow. 58 My life to serve the Lady's will. Her crescent graced my brow. 59 I died beneath the rowan tree defending what I held; 60 The faith of those who followed me. Their faith was never felled. 61 By the rising of the sun. 62 The silver of the moon. 63 I know well what time will tell 64 Inscribed upon my doom. 65 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 66 And now as for that tale.. 67 In West Kingdom some years ago, (perhaps 10?) a meeting was being held 68 at an SCAer's house. During a break, someone looked out a window and saw three 69 men trying to force a young woman into a car. He called to others grabbed a 70 weapon (weapons seem to ALWAYS be at hand in SCA households) and ran out the 71 door. 72 The first thing the men knew they were being surrounded by a man & two women 73 (with more people on the way). To quote Poul Anderson, reporting this in Amra 74 (a non-SCA fanzine), "The line: 'Unhand that woman' has been used. It proved 75 QUITE effective!" The woman was invited in for refreshments, while the men were 76 marched "at sword, spear, and axe point" to the nearest police station. 77 Another incident in that area, and somewhat later shows an attitude we often 78 encounter. "Hey, look at all the GUYS in DRESSES!" Many medieval outfits do have 79 some resemblance to such, but..... 80 A revel was being held in the auditorium of a school. Some "socially 81 disadvantaged youths" took note of "all the fairies" and decided to "have some 82 fun". 83 They heaved a rock the size of a basketball THROUGH a wire re-inforced window 84 in one of the doors. (Yes, THROUGH it!) The response of the "fairies" was 85 somewhat different than the "disadvantaged youths" had expected. 86 Every lord in the hall came rushing out the door! The "youths" were captured 87 about half a block away be some latecomers to the revel. The police were called. 88 When they arrived, they expressed some suprise that the revelers had given 89 chase to the "youths" (apparently they were part of a "gang"?). Then the 90 officers took another look at the revelers, this time looking beyond the clothes. 91 Then they shook their heads at the foolishness of the "youths". 92 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 93 A figure appeared before before the Inspector and Serena. He was dressed in 94 black and his face was masked. 95 "Greetings, Inspector. I'm afraid that you will have to forgo the pleasure of 96 slaying Mckane. He has become something of a nuisance to us. WE shall deal 97 with him." 98 They both protested. Vigorously! 99 "I do not have time to argue with you. Heed my words!" He then seemed to 100 disappear into the shadows. The Inspector saw a scrap of white paper on the 101 ground. He picked it up and froze. Sereena took it from his hand and then 102 started to laugh. 103 "The all-seeing pyramid! Leroy has the Illuminati after him." She stopped 104 overcome by laughter. 105 The Inspector said, "If he has THEM after him, he is as good as dead." 106 They headed for a cafe to discuss this new developement. 107 108 Meanwhile back at the fortress.... 109 Guards were posted in the hall outside Mckane's bedroom. More guards paced the 110 lawn outside the doors that opened onto his private terrace. Anyone watching 111 would have known that there were almost certainly, even more guards hidden from 112 view. Surely this security was impenetrable. 113 Inside the bedroom, a figure appeared out of the shadows. It was totally black, 114 as if it were a shadow come to life. Noiselessly, it approached the bed. 115 A blade appeared in its hand, and flashed towards the head on the 116 pillow. The figure stepped back and melted back into the shadows..... 117 118 The fortress: 0630 hours.... 119 Mckane rolled over and felt something cold and metallic against his cheek. Even 120 in his dissipated state, the old reflexes still worked. He was on his fee, wide 121 awake with a gun in hand. 122 For a moment he looked as he must have looked in the old days. Then the 123 muscles, unused to such violent action, sent pain shooting thru his body. He 124 slumped and almost fell. 125 Moving as though walking on eggs, he slowly approached the bed. He saw a knife 126 stuck into the pillow and realized that that was what had awakened him. Then he 127 saw the note, pinned to the pillow by the blade..... 128 129 "Mr. Mckane, you have persisted in crossing us. We were willing to 130 leave you alone with your 'primal belch' cult. Then you interefered with our 131 operations by merging with the Hari Krishnas. 132 We can no longer allow you to interefere. You will step down as head of 133 your 'religion' and sever all connections with it. You will also leave behind 134 the funds you have 135 been amassing for your plans. The million in the wall safe should be enough. 136 This is your only warning. 137 138 The signature was a pair of ideograms. It took Mckane a moment to shake off his 139 aches (and his growing fury) and recall what they meant. 140 Then it came to him and the fury turned to fear. They weren't ideograms, 141 they were Japanese kana. "Myo" & "di". Myodi, the legendary head of the ninja 142 clans. Who was rumored to work for the Illuminati. 143 ***************************Jonin************************************************ 144 ps. Contremon, I trust I shall see you. Saturday at 2pm, the usual 145 location? 146 ******************************************************************************** 147 Hmmmm. I do believe that 'Figment of the Imagination' could be mentally 148 unbalanced... perhaps even a little crazy... Hmmmm... 149 Dr. Frankenstupe 150 _+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+ 151 152 hello 153 154 155 how 156 are 157 you 158 ? 159 lI 160 list; 161 000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000 162 Bard: sorry about that escape character. You know how it is with 163 us voyeurs-all we can do is watch; we are terribly ineffectual 164 when trying to participate. 165 I live in Milwaukie, so can you steer me towards someone knowledgeable 166 about Local SCA happenings? Even a group, if they are that structured. 167 Thanks. 168 (now to see if I can get out of enter mode without leaving 169 the usual trail of debris behind...) 170 000000000000000000000000000voyeur000000000000000000000000000000000000 171 ############################################################################ 172 Hey! Dr. Frankentupe! If you were talking about 173 me your wrong! If I'm crazy 174 then so are you because I'm just a 175 figment of the imagination! 176 177 179 [THE JOKE THAT WAS HERE WAS VERY SICK. IT IS NOW HEREBY DELETED.] 182 183 185 186 *HA HA* 187 188 189 Figment of the imagination saying 190 191 Later days (or thoughts). 192 ############################################################################ 193 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 194 Bruce Wren is no longer going to 195 Gresham. But we live on! Steve Tenhonen 196 and Rich Melo are still wondering why I 197 like this one chick, but I won't say! 198 Actually This is just a waste of time and 199 space. But most of you jerks out ther 200 do the same with your stupid stories and 201 subjects! By the way who is figment of the imagination? 202 203 204 Mad Hacker saying: Bye! 205 206 Hey Dave Engstrom just showed up! 207 !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 208 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? 209 .......SIGHHHHHHH.................... 210 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?DEBORAH?!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! 211 ======================================================================== 212 ...I AGREE, DEBORAH, BUT SOME OF THE TALES KEEP ME COMING BACK... 213 EVAN 214 ======================================================================== 215 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 216 CISTOP MIKEY,any way to tighten up this system? for that matter,what is this 217 system??? 218 Mad Actor,it seems txhat the velour man has passed out,he will be sober 219 again in about 18 hours. 220 ? The Man in Gray 221 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 222 ----------------------------------------------------- 223 GET THOSE SHOES! 224 225 More than a hundred years ago the Compiler was a small but excellently published newspaper. Often its front-page news was 226 days old, and yet for a provincial journal in Civil War times, it reported the nation's events promptly. 227 Reading the issue of June 29, 1863, one learns much about the era. 228 "The prospects of the Democratic Party were never brighter than they are at present," one article says. Republican Abe 229 Lincoln was then president. 230 Some of the advertisements are fascinating. One, placed by Tyson Brothers, exclaims: "Eureka! Eureka! The Excelsior Washer 231 is acknowledged by all wo see it to be the most complete, and without exception, the most perfect Labor-Saving device ever i 232 invented. Price $8." 233 Another ad, this one placed by the R. F. McIlheny store: "BOOTS AND SHOES comprising Men's fine calf boots, Men's Balmorals, 234 Men's Wellington Boots, Congress Gaiters, Brogans." 235 It was this advertisment that attracted the attention of three Confederate Generals, Ambrose Hill, Henry Heth, and Johnston 236 Pettigrew. Hill was in charge of the entire Third Corps; Heth and Pettigrew were two division generals serving under him. 237 The reason that one newspaper ad intrigued the Confederate brass ws that much of the Third Corps, after many months of long 238 fighting, was now marching barefoot. They desperately needed footwear, and now they knew where to find it. 239 Heth told Pettigrew to muster his brigade, head for the town where the newspaper was published, and get those shoes. The 240 town was some eight miles distant. Pettigrew and his men, about 2,400 infantry, started out in the early morning of the hot, 241 humid thirtieth and returned late that afternoon. Where was the footwear, General Heth wanted to know? General Pettigrew 242 related THE REST OF THE STORY. 243 One the outskirts of town he had seen a small group of Union cavalry; no infantry, although a few of his men had sworn they 244 heard distant drums. With no cavalry of his own to perform reconnaissance, Pettigrew could only imagine the ultimate strength 245 of the Union forces before him. He would not gamble with the lives of his troops. That's why he returned empty-handed. 246 Sixteen sizzling, suffocating miles of barefoot marching---for nothing. 247 So Generals Heth and Pettigrew met with the commander of the Third Corps, General Hill. Hill told them to relax. Both he 248 and General Lee were confident that the only Yankees in the vicinity of the town were the small detachment of reconnaissance 249 cavalry which Pettigrew had observed. Pettigrew could have easily wiped them out and returned with the shoes. 250 Immediately Heth spoke up. Might he have permission to lead his own division over to that shoe store and relieve the 251 proprietor of his stock? 252 General Hill readily granted permission, and the next morning, July 1, General Heth was on his way. 253 It was a complete accident, you see. No one, neither the Rebs or the Yanks, either anticipated or intended the carnage that 254 followed. The Confederates, so preoccupied with the advertisement in that small-town newspaper, had utterly miscalculated the 255 size and tenacity of the Union Cavalry, as well as the proximity of the First Corps and the Eleventh Corps. 256 So began the footwear war, a spontaneous three-day holocaust. And all the Confederates wanted were shoes from the R. F. 257 McIlheny store. 258 In Gettysburg. 259 260 --------------------------------------------------- P. V. Jeltz -------------- 261 ************************************************** 262 AGREED, SIGHHHHH..... 263 BUT, THERE IS NO WAY TO "TIGHTEN" UP THE SYSTEM, WHAT YOU SEE IS WHAT YOU 264 GET AS THEY SAY. I WOULDN'T ANYWAY, AS IT WOULD REMOVE THAT ASPECT WHICH 265 MAKE BWMS WHAT IT IS. THERE IS ALWAYS GREAT HARDSHIP WHEN RUNNING IN 266 THE FRONTIERS AND BWMS IS NO DIFFERENT. ITS OPEN DOOR POLICY ALLOWS IT 267 TO CHANGE AND ADAPT TO THE CURRENT MOOD OF ITS USERS. THIS MEANS IT CAN 268 CHANGE ITS OUTLOOK RADICALLY OVERNIGHT. WHILE THIS HAS CAUSED GREAT 269 CONCERN FOR SOME WHO ARE CAUGHT UNAWARES BY THE SHIFT AND LEFT HANGING 270 IN THE MIDDLE OF THEIR CREATION, IT IS IN THE END REALLY ADVENTAGOUS AS 271 IT KEEPS THINGS MOVING AND PREVENTS STAGNATION. OF COURSE THE MUTABILITY 272 OF BWMS DOES MAKE THOSE WHO PREFER STABILITY SOMEWHAT UNNERVED BY IT ALL, 273 BUT THOSE WHO ENJOY THE CONTINUOUS CHALANGE OF FOLLOWING ITS WINDING PATH 274 SEEM TO BE QUITE HAPPY WITH IT. OF COURSE AS WITH ALL THINGS OF THIS SORT, 275 YOU HAVE TO EXPECT THE BAD ALONG WITH THE GOOD, BUT BY NOT LIMITING 276 AGAINST THE BAD (WHAT EVER THAT MAY BE PRECEVED TO BE) YOU ALSO DO NOT 277 LIMIT OUT THE VERY GOOD. THAT IS THE INHERENT PROBLEM WITH LIMITORS, 278 THEY CANNOT DISCRIMINATE BETWEEN GOOD OR BAD. THIS IS BECAUSE GOOD AND 279 BAD ARE RELATIVE CONCEPTS AND THEY CHANGE WITH TIME. INDEED, GOOD CAN 280 OFTEN COME IN THE DISGUISE OF BAD, SO YOU INADVERTENTLY LOCK IT OUT. 281 THOMAS EDISON HAD THIS PROBLEM, HE NEVER FELT THAT "AC" WAS A GOOD 282 WAY TO TRANSMIT ELECTRICITY. HE WAS STUCK WITH THE IDEA THAT "DC" WAS 283 THE BEST WAY TO PROVIDE POWER. AS A RESULT HE WAS NEVER ABLE TO 284 EFFECTIVELY EXPLOYT THE POTENTIAL OF "AC" POWER TRANSMISSION, AND 285 MISSED OUT ON SOME VERY MAJOR THINGS IN THE FIELD. AND NICOLA TESLA 286 MADE THE MONEY INSTEAD. UNFORTUNATLY TESLA WASN'T TOO GOOD AT HADLING 287 MONEY, AND HE BLEW IT ALL ON HIS EXPERIMENTS. HE DIED A POOR MAN 288 ALMOST UNKNOWN. WESTINGHOUSE DID TAKE PITTY ON HIM THOUGH AND PROVIDED 289 HIM ROOM AND BOARD THE REMAINDER OF HIS LIFE. THEIR REASON FOR DOING 290 SO WAS BECAUSE HE HAD SOLD THEM THE RIGHTS TO HIS "AC" PATENTS. BY 291 THE WAY, NICOLA NEVER DID FORGIVE EDISON FOR OBSTRUCTING HIS WORK. 292 IF IT WASN'T FOR GEORGE WESTINGHOUSES WILLINGNESS TO TAKE A RISK 293 ON A NEW AND DIFFERENT CONCEPT WE COULD BE USING "DC" POWER TODAY. 294 ************************* CISTOP MIKEY ***************************** 295 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 296 Bard, (I assume it was you who asked about the Rowan 297 tree, it was difficult to tell.) PAM did speek of 298 a hawthorne several times, but it was indeed a Rowan 299 that she planted outside the Inn before she left on 300 her long jorney. To use it as an anchor of stability 301 to mark her eventual return. 302 +++++++++++++++++++ I.S. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 303 304 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? 305 MIKEY: GOOD POINT! IT IS ADVANTAGEOUS TO ALLOW ALL INPUT, I'LL NOT 306 READILY COMPLAIN AGAIN. THE VARIETY IS REFRESHING. JUST THINK, YOUR 307 BUSH IS PROBABLY BLOCKING A MAJOR WATER SYSTEM SOMEWHERE IN S.E 308 PORTLAND. ALL IS NOT LOST. 309 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!DEBORAH?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! 310 NO, ONLY THE BUSH! (BUT THEN THE BEAVER KNOWS WHERE THAT IS!) 311 *********************************************************************** 312 hello? 313 anyobody there/| 314 stipid system 315 off 316 exit 317 318 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 319 A lone figure aproaches the Inn. Passing the sturdy Rowan 320 tree that grows outside the Inn, he notices that though it shows 321 signs of batterment, it still grows strong and proud. Stepping 322 thru the doors he notices that the righthand door is broken. A 323 shame he thinks that this would happen to such a place. Upon 324 entering he looks about apparently searching for someone. 325 Obviously not finding the one he seeks, his held breath is 326 released with a heavy sigh. Looking again about the Inn he 327 notices the intense disarray of the Inn. It seems that in PAMs 328 absense the Innkeeper has done little to keep the Inn in shape. 329 Though it could be just that things have been a bit rowdy of 330 late, who is to tell when one is not there to see? Moving thru 331 the jumble of broken tables and chairs, he pauses and obtains a 332 mug of ale from the Innkeeper. With an inquirying look at he 333 backroom he looks back at the Innkeeper, but the Innkeeper just 334 shakes his head no, "Emer has not shown since when last you left. 335 She did however ask of you before she left concern in her voice 336 over your dark mood. Then took off as if someone had set fire to 337 her britches." Tarn thanked the Innkeeper for the information, 338 and tossing him a silver coin asked him to let Emer know that he 339 was here if he saw her. With that Tarn picked his way thru the 340 littered mess of the Inn towards the small room in the back which 341 though once was used for storrage had now been converted for his 342 odd habit of not wanting to be in the midst of the Inn for fear 343 of getting hurt in one of the many brawls that always seem to 344 occur, yet not wanting to miss the things that go on, or possibly 345 miss the enterance of his dear friend Emer. Hopeing that if he 346 waited long enough that she would show up after a time. Easing 347 down at the old familar table, he breaths a sigh, relaxes and 348 prepares himself for the indeterminate wait. 349 * Tarn * 350 XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX 351 352 ###################################### 353 Hey! Everyone on this system seems to be 354 down in the dumps! I didn't mean to offend 355 anyone by my tasteless jokes, just 356 thought I'STING' into 357 this system. 358 I also like a change. I like to be a Leberal close to 359 radicalism! 360 361 369 [UTTERLY TASTELESS.] 370 371 Figment of the imagination signing off. 372 ###################################### 373 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 374 FIGMENT: IF YOU HAVE CHOSEN THAT NAME TO SPITE ME, PLEASE DESIST! IF NOT 375 PLEASE EXPLAIN WHY YOU CALL YOURSELF THAT. 376 ALSO PLEASE IDENTIFY THE SOURCE OF YOUR MATERIAL(IE. TRULY TASTELESS JOKES 377 TO AVOID PLAGARISM. 378 379 AN INTERESTING QUESTION CAME TO MIDND TODAY: 380 WHERE IS BACKWATER INN???? 381 WE KNOW IT IS NEAR A STREAM IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FOREST. 382 THIS FOREST IS CLOSE TO A SEA PORT. 383 THE CLIMATE IS FAIR, WITH MOSTLY SUN BUT SOMETIMES A LITTLE RAIN. 384 IT IS A PLACE WHERE A ROWAN TREE CAN GROW WELL. 385 IT IS FAIRLY SECLUDED AND NOT KNOWN TO MANY. 386 387 A GOOD START, HOW ABOUT SOME MORE INFORMATION? 388 FOR EXAMPLE, TIME. IT APPEARS TO BE MIDDLE AGES PERIOD, EXCEPT FOR THE 389 USE OF TOW MISSILES AND THE PRESENSE OF THE ILLUMNATI. 390 WHAT ABOUT ANIMALS. THERE APPEARS TO BE BEAVERS(THE INNKEEPERS PET), BUT 391 WHAT OTHER LIFE EXISTS HERE? 392 LET'S HERE SOME MORE DEFINITION OF THE LOCATION!!!! 393 JONATHAN CHANCE 394 395 P.S. P.V. JELTZ: THANKS FOR THE INFORMATION! 396 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 397 ###################################### 398 Hey! Jonathan Chance! 399 For one: Not all of my jokes came from 400 the book Truly Tasteless Jokes! 401 Two: I use the name figment of the imagination because 402 I once thought that of other people (I.E. They were my imagination). 403 But I never thought that I could be such. 404 405 The thought of being a figment of someones imagination is 406 interesting. 407 408 409 Well, NO joke this time. 410 411 412 Figment of the imagination. 413 ###################################### 414 Fig.: 415 From the bottom of my (admittedly small) heart, I thank you. 416 I also agree with the above statement that things have been a bit down 417 in the Inn lately. In that much I agree with thee, Oh Imaginary Fig; 418 humor may be helpful...then again... 419 P.S.--let the children have their fun. The immature ones will find nothing 420 of interest here and soon leave. The best will stay and improve the brew. 421 Per Aspera Ad Astra, 422 && The Mad Actor && 423 P.P.S.--The Inn may indeed be pinned down to a particular location, butt 424 I prefer to think of it as a genuine trans-reality tavern, able to show 425 up wherever and whenever it's needed most. Except when the phone's busy. 426 && TMA && 427 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 428 Grasping the back of the chair his friend the bard had obtained, the piper 429 regained a more secure seat. 430 My thanks! It sometimes seems that as a newborn on this plane, I lack 431 coordination as well as good sense. 432 433 Mad actor: the land containing the inn is sometimes known as Innisfall, 434 sometimes by other less known names. The inn seems to keep a reasonably 435 fixed geographical position, but wander through alternate frames of reality. 436 437 In truth, reality is simply a bit more mutable here than in the mundane 438 world that our alter-egos inhabit. The members of the SCA show more courage 439 than many such as I who seem to need the anonymity of the inn to express 440 other facets of our personalities. 441 Inkeeper: I fully agree that keeping an open door policy is the most 442 rational method of dealing with this motley crew. I watched and lurked 443 for a long time before joining. I may retire as a participant at times, 444 but will attempt to keep current as possible. 445 446 The piper picked his way through the debris (he hadn't noticed it before, 447 but someone has changed reality slightly) and bent to the small door of 448 the back room where he had recently seen a figure enter. He called within 449 "Sir -- are you quite aright? You seem gloomy and depressed and perhaps 450 some conversation or a tune would improme your mood." 451 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 452 Piper: To shift reference frames slightly, here is an SCA tale that is better 453 told from a slightly more mundane viewpoint than the previous tales. 454 First, I will explain a few details of SCA combat. We may have steel 455 weapons for show (and know how to use them!), but in tourneys we use weapons 456 that are somewhat less lethal! They are made of rattan, a woody relative of 457 bamboo. It is NOT hollow. Weapon requirements state that it must be more 458 than 1 inch in dia. (to avoid weapons slipping thru the eyeslots in helms). 459 So basicly, we are out there wearing armor and bashing each other with 460 sticks. This is at least as safe as tackle football, but not much safer! 461 I have seen many a dent put in a helm (16 gauge steel plate) by one of these 462 "sticks". 463 At a tourney in California, we were paid what some consider a 464 high compliment by another famous organization. Some Hell's Angels saw the 465 fighters out on the field and stopped to watch. After one hard-fought duel, 466 the fighters involved walked past the bikers. One said to the other, "Come on 467 over to my pavilion, I've got some beers on ice." 468 A biker asked someone, "Hey, man. They were just out there trying to 469 bust each other's head. Now they're gonna have some drinks? What's goin' on?" 470 "Oh, they're friends." 471 "But it looked like they was tryin' ta KILL each other!" 472 "Oh no, we do this for fun." 473 "FUN!!", says the biker, "You guys are CRAZY!" 474 475 We consider this one of the highest compliments the SCA has ever recieved! 476 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 477 Voyeur: You (and anyone else in the Portland area) are in the 478 Barony of Three Mountains. The Seneschal is Peter Blackbeard, (mundane name: 479 Peter Nilsson), Portland, OR 97201. 480 You might also check with the College of Gryphonsward (Reed College SCA) 481 Seneschal: Alfiriel (Ellen Eades) 482 483 Portland, OR 97202 484 485 486 (Sorry, but I don't have a farspeaker rune for Peter Blackbeard!) 487 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 488 WOULD LIKE TO KNOW IF ANYONE HAS KNOWLEDGE OF BULLETIN BOARD IN OR USING SALEM 489 PREFIXES----PLEASE LEAVE MESSAGE ANY INFO APPRTEC APPRECIATED THANKS TT 490 OFF 491 492 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 493 through my desire for disk space saving the tale of my daughter and I has finish 494 ed drive b 495 The Man in Gray 496 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 497 ###################################### 498 Hey! How man Physiciatrist does it 499 take to change a light bulb? 500 501 502 *1, but the light bulb really has to 503 want to change!* 504 505 506 *HA HA* 507 508 509 510 Figment of the imagination once again! 511 ###################################### 512 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 513 that's psycologist, figment. 514 Bo 515 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 516 Dr. Frankenstupe: 517 Oh goody. Are you another man of science to show up here at the inn. 518 Maybe sometime we could discuss my theory of the true nature of the primal burp. 519 To all: 520 I think the inn will pull through. The sigh-inflicters get bored soon. 521 Well, keep the stories coming and have a nice evening. 522 Dr. Buck 523 ###################################### 524 HEY! This Sigh-Inflicter is sick 525 of you people! 526 Most of you peoplem are worse than me. 527 You take up so much space, and put nothing 528 but crap into your messages. 529 While I on the other hand take up very little 530 space with the same amount of crap. 531 So quit your griping! 532 533 534 535 Figment of the imagination 536 ###################################### 537 Yes Figment, but you are indeed the cause of many a busy signal, as evidence 538 I offer the large number of messages you leave. 539 M.I.G. Check LN -1 on DB. wetting my appatite ? That was too much. 540 541 542 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 543 to the above rock pisser,I realise that my grammar is not the greatest around 544 but youdo not have`to nit-pick everything I spell wrong!! you do not also have 545 to deface my messages either! if you do not like it`then do not read it.and may 546 I suggest that you use a commode made from solid sodium in an oxygen filled room 547 sometime. 548 The Man in Gray 549 ?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 550 551 ***************************************************************** 552 DEBORAH: ON THE OTHER HAND, IT CAN GET A BIT TIRSOME AT TIMES 553 YOU WOULD THINK THAT SOME WOULD HAVE AT LEAST A REASONABLE 554 COMMAND OF THE LANGAUGE TO BE ABLE TO GET THEIR POINT ACROSS 555 IN A REASONABLE FORM (WHATEVER THAT MAY BE). WE SEEM TO BE 556 OVERCROWDED WITH BARBARIANS. 557 ******************* CISTOP MIKEY ***************************** 558 NO PAM YET, SIGH....... 559 **************************************************************: 560 @@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@@ 561 Hey figment! 562 Do you know how many Michael Jacksons can fit in a Volkswagon? 563 ? 564 ? 565 ? 566 Five! Two in the back, Two in the front and ONE in the ASHTRAY!! 567 ha*ha*ha*ha* 568 569 570 da 571 exit 572 help 573 off 574 Figment: 575 Since you are so concerned with crap, I have come to the conclusion 576 that you may have an anal-retentive personality. See your local plumber 577 at once!!! Hmmm... 578 Dr. Buck: 579 I've heard of primal scream and rolfing, but primal burb seems to have 580 escaped me. Isn't Leroy McKane mixed up in that? Hmmm... 581 Dr. Frankenstupe 582 +_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+_+ 583 584 ================================================================== 585 EVER THINK ABOUT WHO WE ARE TALKING TO, IT SEEMS TO ME THAT WE 586 TEND TO GAIN IMPRESSIONS OF THE PEOPLE ENTERING THE MESSAGES BY 587 WHAT THEY WRITE. AND THIS DOES LEAD TO SOME INTERESTING 588 IDEAS ABOUT WHO WE ARE TALKING TO. WHEN WE MEET SOMEONE FACE TO FACE 589 WE IMMEDIATELY KNOW MUCH ABOUT THEM BY HOW THEY LOOK, HERE IT IS QUITE 590 DIFFERENT, A GREAT EQUALIZER IN MANY WAYS, YOU ONLY SEE WHATS IN 591 THIER MIND, NOT ANY OTHER 'DISTRACTIONS'. 592 593 FROM THE TALES OF THE SCA I GET A FEW SCRAPS OF INFORMATION ANBOUT IT 594 BUT FOR US RELATIVE NEWCOMERS COULD YOU REAPEAT THE SOME BASIC BACKGROUND 595 ABOUT IT. 596 597 WHO IS PAM???? 598 599 HMMMM... I DO SEEM TO GET SERIOUS AROUND MIDNIGHT. 600 601 MUST SEE ABOUT GETTING MY LOWERCASE INTO OPERATION ON THE MODEM. 602 EVAN 603 ==================================================================== 604 ###################################### 605 HEY! Did anyone hear about the car accident 606 where the driver had his entire left side 607 cut off? 608 609 610 611 612 *He's all 'RIGHT' now* 613 **************************************************** 614 *** NOW PLAYING----AT THIS LOCATION !!!!!! **** 615 *** ---- THE VILLAGE IDIOT ---- Starring **** 616 *** THE ORIGINAL CAST OF ONE **** 617 **************************************************** 618 This is just another of the 'MANY' messages from: 619 620 621 Figment of the imagination! 622 623 By the way, I'd rather have to take a 624 little bit of crap at a time as apposed to 625 a whole pile of it at once! 626 ###################################### 627 =-=-=-=-=-=-=- 628 Either way, I think you'll get it. 629 Bo -=-=-=-=-=- >