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LIST_ FILE ON MARGIN IS 120 STATUS: ALL ALLOWED NUMBER OF LINES: 629 1 If you are in need of help, you need but ask.... 2 ************************ REMOVED: 10 FEB 84 **************** 3 Welcome to BWMS (BackWater Message System) Mike Day System operator 4 ************************************************************ 5 GENERAL DISCLAIMER: BWMS IS NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR ANY INFORMATION 6 PLACED ON THIS SYSTEM. 7 BWMS was created as an electronic bill board. BWMS is a privatly owned 8 and operated system which is currently open for use by the general public. 9 No restrictions are placed on the use of the system. As the system is 10 privatly owned, I retain the right to remove any and all messages which 11 I may find offensive. Because of the limited size of the system, it will be 12 periodically purged of messages. (only 629 lines of data can be saved) 13 To leave a message, type 'ENTER' and use ctrl/C or break to get out of the 14 ENTER mode. The message is automatically stored. If after entering the 15 message you find you made a mistake, use the replace command to replace 16 the line. To exit from the system, type 'OFF' then hang up. 17 Type 'HELP' to see other commands that are available on the system. 18 ************************************************************ 19 20 To: Jonathan ChanceIf I am a figment of your imagination, you are imagining 21 this conversation. Therefore, my arguments are meaningless. (Solipsism is not 22 well thought of because there is NO way to prove or disprove it. It DOES 23 violate the law of parsimony however!) 24 _______________________________________Leonard_________________________________ 25 Weapons at the Door (by Joseph of Locksley) 26 As I roved out to Western lands to take the Western air, 27 I went into a revel hall and saw a Twelfth Night There. 28 But I was halted at the door by a privy councilor 29 And told that I would have to leave my weapons at the door. 30 31 As I, in my astonishment, stood hung on tenter-pegs 32 A knight came in whose Prowess hung down between his legs 33 The doorman grabbed a greatsword and he struck the knight full sore 34 And gave him a receipt, he left his weapon at the door. 35 36 A bard was next, whose goodly voice has entertained us all 37 But he too was prevented from entering the hall 38 And told he must refrain from taking weapons on the floor 39 He checked his voice and harp among the weapons at the door. 40 41 A Master entered graciously, a man we all know well 42 Who holds a third dan black belt, though this he'd never tell 43 It was a valiant struggle, the master cursed and swore 44 But he left his hands and feet as weapons at the door. 45 46 The company was jovial, although a bit dismayed 47 For lack of proper cutlery, down to the smallest blade 48 For even teeth and fingernails (both can be used in war) 49 Were cut and pulled and left behind as weapons at the door. 50 51 And has their King not loyal knights, that he must be afraid 52 Of brawling in his hall, and of assassin's bloody blade? 53 The right of men to carry arms at least WE'VE not forswore! 54 A pox on him who made the rule of weapons at the door! 55 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 56 Piper, this is an example of why one should never irritate a bard. 57 The bard who wrote this was inconvenienced by a "check your weapons at the door" 58 policy while visiting the Kingdom of the West. You can see the result! 59 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 60 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ 61 The dockside bar was crowded and smokey, the port scum and hookers 62 going through the motions, a dead body still unremoved in one corner. 63 The Inspector, in disguise, sat listening quietly to the conversations 64 around him, hoping for a clue. As he sat with his head on the table, 65 feigning drunkeness, he was quite surprised to hear the scraping of 66 a chair on the floor and someone sitting at the table across from him. 67 As he looked up, he saw a tall blonde man in a white suit which 68 would have cost him a months' pay back on the force. The man was smiling. 69 "Aye, what would ye be wantin' mate?" the inspector drawled. The man 70 smiled wider. His accent was faintly British, but mixed, a man who traveled 71 widely. 72 "Mr. Salizar. Have no fear, I will not betray your identity. My 73 name is Contremon Valerius." He waited for that to sink in, the inspector's 74 eyes widened. 75 "You killed the assasin at the cafe. I believe we owe you our lives." 76 "Well, yes and no. I arranged for Serena's protection, for I needed 77 her to lead me to you. McKane's people know Serena has contacted someone, 78 but all leads to you have, shall we say, terminated. But we must act 79 quickly. McKane's headquarters are about one hundred kilometers from 80 here in the jungle. Here are the plans to his fortress. You must go 81 tonight, as a mercenary, named Michael Serente. Monsieur Serente wil 82 not be catching his transport. Go now, before you are spotted. Here are 83 your papers. Go!" 84 Alberto got up. Stuffing the wad of papers into his jacket. "What 85 about Serena? How will she find me?" 86 "Serena, IF she gets here alive, will be informed. We have not 87 uncovered a clue of her wherabouts since you left on the steamer." 88 "Just Who are you?" 89 "An old friend of McKane's. An old, old, friend..." 90 ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^Contremon^^^^ 91 ############################################################ 92 "...Ok, explain." and he sat back to listen. 93 "I met Diane in college, the few years I was there. She was a 94 physicist, just starting her graduate study and showing all the signs 95 of a very mediocre career. We had a brief and uneventful romance; she 96 was always joking about 'slumming' when she picked up an engineer who'd 97 washed out to business college. We parted amiably, or at least she parted 98 amiably, and I lost track of her until her name came up, quite surprizingly, 99 for a Nobel Prize." 100 "Wasn't there some sort of scandal associated with that? he shifted, 101 punctuating with his pipe. 102 I was surprized that he'd remembered that little piece of trivia. 103 "Nothing was ever proven, and she was eventually cleared of all suspicion 104 that she'd used another physicist's work, but she wasn't awarded the prize, 105 either." 106 "Go on." 107 "The night of the murder, there was a knock on my door. I remember it 108 was seven O'clock, because I'd just gotten up for a beer between shows. I 109 opened the door, and there she was." Somehow, being here, close to her, 110 or at least as close as one could get to someone who has been spread out 111 over about a hundred square kilometers, I could vividly remember the night 112 she walked back into my life, even almost hear her voice..." 113 ################################daver##################################### 114 !~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~! 115 The place is Calcutta in the West Bengal. The time is now. In the 116 meanest quarter of the city, there is a small lane known to the locals as 117 "The Street of Thieves". On this lane is the dirtiest, darkest dive in all 118 of India. It is simply known as "The Black Hole of Calcutta". <groan> 119 We enter with no small bit of trepidation. The room is lit only by 120 the eerie, flickering light of a 13" portable Zenith black and white TV. 121 On it is playing "DRIVEL, The Terror from Beyond" starring the Bruise 122 Brothers. But that's another story. 123 Dark figures huddle secretively over their drinks. In a corner Serena 124 and the Inspector hold hands and look dreamily into each other's eyes. 125 Their thoughts far away from the task of crakacking McKane's fortress. 126 Sighing heavily, Salazar brings Serena's hand to his lips. He speaks 127 softly; "Serena darling, I hear Pam may be coming back." 128 Throatily, Serena murmers; "Yes, my sweet, it seems some at the Inn 129 delete and overwrite her contributions." 130 "Yes, I know -- but in a trans-reality Inn, one must realize that while 131 we're all a little weird; a few jerks are present, too." 132 "I agree. It's just something we have to accept and deal with. I hope 133 she returns soom. Wassir is thinking about getting up a search party. You 134 know what that means." 135 Suddenly both pause... listening, waiting. Then both dive to the floor. 136 Too late, a voice cries out from the rear: "HIT THE DECK!!!!" 137 138 K A B O O M !!!!! 139 140 A cruise missle smashes through the window taking out the east wall and half 141 of beautiful downtown Calcutta. 142 Slowly from the rubble, Salazar and Serena stand shakily and begin to 143 brush each other off. Serena says, "I think Mohammed is a little jealous; 144 we'll have to stop meeting like this." 145 The Inspector smiles, "Yes, but now let's get some lunch; I'm hungry. 146 Then it's time to take care of McKane's fortress." 147 Arm in arm they walk out into the warm Indian sunshine, a glowing 148 Calcutta at their feet... 149 !~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!Valinor!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~!~! 150 151 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 152 J Chance: I probably am a figment of your imagination. 153 Bo 154 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 155 <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< *.* >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 156 <<<< T.P.W.E.B. cont. 157 158 Nila awoke when the sky was barely alight, as was her 159 custom. She bathed herself with little hands full of the 160 fountain's pure water. Her skin tingled and the warm 161 wind caressed her, making her feel as light as the clouds. 162 Just then the sun rose over the eastern horizon and 163 washed her with warmth, as the fountain had washed her 164 with coolness. She stretched her arms out to it glorying 165 in its radiance. 166 "Oh No!", she said suddenly, dropping her arms like a rag 167 doll, "I haven't reached the place where East begins after 168 all. The sun still rises in the East and it's rising way 169 over there." 170 She sat down with her chin in hand. "I must reason this 171 out logically", she said to herself. I went as far East 172 as I could see from the palace, so logically I have 173 reached the place where East begins. But East still goes 174 on as far as I can see. Oh, what can be wrong? Just then 175 a flight of bees must have passed her flower rich grove, 176 for she heard their sound in her head. Even fainter than 177 that was something that was almost words or the meaning 178 of words without their sound. It whispered, 179 "Don't look outside yourself for 180 something that lies only within." 181 "I understand", Nila said. "I have not reached the place 182 where East begins. I have only reached the place where 183 my eyesight ended. How strange! And now I am here and 184 there is a new eyesight, and a new East... but when will 185 it ever end? Oh, I just don't know what to think!" 186 "WELL", said a deep voice, so near as to make her start. 187 "If you must think, then think this. The logic of the 188 Palace is not the logic of the Fountain!" 189 Beside the fountain sat a large green frog; rather 190 pleasant looking for a frog. It had been his voice that 191 had startled the princess. 192 "But logic is logic isn't it?", Nila asked. 193 "Not at all.", said the frog. He took an enormous leap 194 over right Nila's head, landing behind her. "You see", 195 he continued complacently, "It all depends on where you 196 hop from doesn't it? And what direction you're facing." 197 "Well that doesn't make any sense.", Nila said, "Are you 198 a handsome prince under a spell?" 199 "Yes, of course.", said the frog. "But if you don't mind 200 miss, could we forget about the kissing thing and all 201 that, please. Frankly in my present condition I rather 202 prefer female frogs to beautiful princesses. Nothing at 203 all personal you understand." 204 "But don't you want to be a handsome prince again?", Nila 205 asked mystified, "They always do in the stories." 206 "Not particularly", said the frog. "The prince's prison 207 is the frog's freedom, if you catch my drift. Anyhow 208 froggin' is not the worst experience I've ever had you know. 209 The work is not demanding and your time is your own." 210 "But what kind of work does a frog do?", Nila asked. 211 "Just Froggin'", said the enchanted prince, "It's the 212 natural course of events when you're a frog. Don't look 213 outside yourself for something that lies only within." 214 "I wish everyone would quit saying that.", Nila said 215 stamping her little foot. 216 "No Doubt!", said the frog, "However..." 217 "However What?", Nila said. 218 "Nothing just however... frogs don't mean anything by 219 however... frogs don't mean anything by anything you know. 220 frogs just mean frogs." 221 "I guess I don't know really very much about frogs.", 222 Nila said humbly. 223 "No, nor logic neither, I fear.", said the frog, "no matter." 224 He took another great leap and landed in the spot he had 225 first been. Nila turned around. "Good Bye.", he said, 226 "Nice talking to you. Thanks... 227 228 <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< to be continued... >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 229 230 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 231 at the inn... 232 and just why are you pointing that silly little TOW missile at my body,young 233 lady? said the gray man,obviously hiding a great deal of fear. 234 "didn't you see the new sign that the innkeeper put up(anything efective over 5 235 feet leave at the door)?" 236 "why yes,I did" the lovely young leathal lady said"I just wanted to get your 237 attention,father" 238 "I am not a preast young lady,I doubt youl find one in a tavern" 239 "I know your not a preast,your my father" 240 as the words the young lady spoke fought past the ale induced haze in his mind 241 the gray man decided to order some raw ethyl alcohol,it was going to be an 242 interesting night. 243 The Man in Gray 244 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 245 ========================================================================= 246 JONATHAN: 247 COULD YOU PROVE THAT YOU ARE NOT A FIGMENT OF MY IMAGINATION. 248 EVAN 249 ======================================================================== 250 ######################################################################## 251 Hey everyone! I'm a figment of your imagination! 252 Duh! Duh! 2 + 2 Be 4 253 Be real people! Oooops I forgot you can't be 254 real, Your FAGments of my imagination! 255 ######################################################################## 256 DEWEY KNEW by Paul Aurandt 257 258 Let's say you are running for president. And you have information which would surely defeat the other fellow. But for you 259 to publicize the information might jeopardize the security of our country. 260 Would you speak out anyway, and win, or keep your mouth shut and lose? 261 At least one presidential candidate we know of was confronted with that dilemma. 262 263 In 1944, Tom Dewey was running for president against Franklin Delano Roosevelt. If he, Dewey, hoped to defeat the popular 264 incumbent, he would need all the help he could get. 265 That summer, help arrived in the form of damaging information against his opponent. A shocked, disbelieving Dewey learned 266 that U.S. Intelligence had cracked the Japanese secret code---in 1941. To him that meant that the United States knew in 267 advance of the attack on Pearl Harbor, but that FDR had done nothing to prevent it. 268 Had the Republican candidate's source been less than reliable, I believe Dewey would have dismissed this information as the 269 wishful thinking of some bitter fellow Republican. Dewey's source, however, was completely credible. He had to believe. 270 though the thought of a U.S. president permitting a Pearl Harbor for any reason was thoroughly distasteful to Tom Dewey. 271 His first reaction was: The people must be told THE REST OF THE STORY---that Franklin Roosevelt, to whet our appetites for 272 war, allowed the Japanese to obliterate our base in the Hawiian islands. 273 Then, somehow, Army Chief-of-Staff George Marshall discovered that Dewey knew about the code. 274 September 26, Tom Dewey was campaigning, was staying briefly at a hotel in Tulsa, Oklahoma. He had not yet used his trump 275 card. 276 Dewey was in his Tulsa hotel room. A knock at the door. Dewey answered. A man introduced himself as Colonel Carter Clarke, 277 an army intelligence officer. He, Clarke, had been instructed to deliver a confidential message from George Marshall. 278 Dewey opened the sealed letter from the army chief-of-staff and read: "You understand the utterly tragic consequences if the 279 present political debates regarding Pearl Harbor disclose to the public any suspicion of the vital sources of information we 280 possess. The conduct of all operations in the Pacific are closely related in conception and timing to the information we 281 secretly obtain through these intercepted codes. 282 Marshall was begging Tom Dewey to keep silent for the sake of national security. Remember, in 1944 we were still at war. 283 But for the moment, at least, Dewey could think only of Roosevelt's role in the secrecy. In the presence of Marshall's 284 messenger , Dewey blurted out, "He knew what was happening before Pearl Harbor! Instead of being reelected, he ought to be 285 impeached!" 286 And so was Tom Dewey confronted with perhaps the most agonizing decision in his lifetime. Disclose the damning information 287 , ruin Roosevelt, win the election, and tip our hand to Japan---or keept quiet, lose the election, and preserve the state of 288 our national defense. 289 You know Tom Dewey lost in 1944. 290 Not only did he keep his mouth shut during the campaign, he NEVER recealed his knowledge of the broken Japanese code. 291 Tom Dewey has been dead for oer a decade. 292 In 1981, a secret document was declassified, a document revealing something Tom Dewey never knew. The Japanese code we 293 cracked back in 1941 was DIPLOMATIC code, not military code. It was only after the Japanese had attacked Pearl Harbor that 294 U.S. intelligence learned how to eavesdrop on Japan's military plans. 295 According to that recently declassified document, FDR had no advance knowledge of the Pearl Harbor attack. Neither, in fact, 296 had Japan's own premier, nor that nation's own minister of war! 297 Tom Dewey may have gone to his grave wondering whether he had done the right thing. 298 You know he did. Because now you know THE REST OF THE STORY. 299 300 -------------------------------------------------- P. V. Jeltz ---------------- 301 STOP 302 /EX 303 /X 304 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 305 Just wondering: what does that message "FILE UNSAFE" mean? 306 Bo 307 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 308 ############################ 309 Who cares 'BO'? We're all just figments 310 of somebody's imagination. 311 Which, for some odd reason brings me to this joke[ 312 *Why can't you go to the bathroom at 313 a Beatles' concert? 314 315 There's no John. 316 *HA HA* 317 318 Well this is 'figment of the imagination' signing off___ 319 320 321 **************************** 322 HEY IF I'M A FIGMENT OF YOUR IMAGINATION WILL YOU PLEASE WAKE UP!!! 323 I AM REALLY CURIOUS WHAT WILL HAPPEN TO ME. IT MAY BE A FLEETING 324 REALIZATION, BUT IT SHOULD BE INTERESTING. I MAY HAVE MISSED SOME OF THE 325 ENTRIES ON TIME TRAVEL BUT IT IS A FASCINATING SUBJECT. IF WE ASSUME 326 THAT TIME TRAVEL IS POSSIBLE, AND THAT IT IS SERIAL. IE. THERE IS ONE TIME TRACK AND CHANGES ARE CUMULATIVE. THEN THAT 327 ENSURES FREE WILL. THE FUTURE WILL ALWAYS BE IN FLUX. ALSO THE PRESENT AND 328 THE PAST OF COURSE. WHERE WILL WE PUT THAT MYTHICAL OBSERVER WHO CAN SEE 329 THE CHANGES WITHOUT BEING AFECTED. 330 IT DOES SEEM TO ME THOUGH THAT IF TIME TRAVEL IS INVENTED. AND THAT THE 331 ABOVE ASSUMPTIONS ARE TRUE. THEN TIME TRAVEL WILL SOONER ARE LATER BE 332 UNINVENTED (WIPED OUT) BY RANDOM CHANGES IN THE TIME STREAM. THEREBY 333 ELIMINATING ANY PARADOXES, LOOPS, OR WHATEVER. 334 HOW CAN ANYONE DETERMINE IN ADVANCE WHAT WILL CHANGE THE FUTURE. 335 336 BY THE WAY HAS ANYONE CONSIDERED THAT IF THERE ARE TIME TRAVELERS. THAT 337 MAY BE THE SOURCE OF ALL THE NEW DISEASES (FLU OUTBREAKS AND OTHER 338 SIMILAR PRIMARILY NON FATAL DISEASES.) I AM ASSUMING THAT TRAVELERS WOULD BE 339 AT LEAST SOMEWHAT SCREENED. CONSIDERING THE INCREASES IN GOVERMENT INTERVENTION 340 IS SCIENCE. TIME TRAVEL MUST BE EXPENSIVE AND BULKY. 341 TO GET BACK TO THE SUBJECT THOUGH. TIME TRAVEL WOULD TEND TO TELESCOPE EVOLUTION 342 ON THE MICRO LEVEL. WELL ANY COMMENTS. 343 344 STEVE 345 ************************************************************************** 346 OFF 347 348 349 350 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 351 The piper roared with laughter as the bard finished his tune. 352 353 "My friend, I certainly would hesitate to offend one whose wit and tounge bite 354 so deeply. And I am certainly glad that the good innkeeper has no such restrictions 355 at the entrance to the inn. 356 At our last meeting, Did you not speak of an orginization called the SCA? I've 357 been aware of the group for quite a while, and it seems to me that they (and you 358 if you are a member) perform a valuable service in our society. 359 Mundane life badly needs a leaven of fantasy and humor to make it bearable. 360 Without good humor and a dash of fantasy, the grey tedium of life would be more 361 than many sensitive souls could withstand. Could you perhaps enlighten some 362 of the other patrons as well as myself with some of the tales of those who 363 participate in these matters? 364 AHH THE ALE!!" 365 The piper grabbed the large jack of ale that the innkeeper proffered. Tilting 366 his head back, the piper poured the contents down his throat in one motion, 367 wiped the foam from his mustaches and returned the jack for a refill. 368 Blowing a mightly breath, he inflated the bag as he slung his pipes to his 369 shoulder, gave the bag a short jerk with his elbow to start the drones and 370 began playing "the drunken piper." 371 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 372 373 <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< ... >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 374 375 It's not so much that reality is in question... 376 It's that there are too many FIGs without imagination!!! 377 378 <<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<<< ... >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> 379 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 380 Jonathan Chance,you are right,our venerable and respected high school was filled 381 to the rafters with less then intelegent people.however you must remember that 382 about 27% of the "patrons" of this in must be from this place of higher 383 learning,but at least you can take your abuse in small individual doses.As for 384 my newly aquired daughter I will probably get creative around 4 a.m.I was not 385 able to show at chs due to some old friends leaving soon,you know which ones. 386 The Man in Gray(accept no substitutes) 387 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 388 MAN IN GRAY:THAT'S PRIEST, NOT PREAST! ALSO, YOU MEANT "YOU ARE" MY FATHER, 389 WHICH IS PROPERLY CONTRACTED "YOU'RE". THE WAY YOU SPELLED IT MAKES IT 390 THE POSSESIVE CASE (YOUR HAT, YOUR COAT), THUS THE SENTENCE MAKES NO SENSE! 391 ::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::: 392 Ah yes, tales of the SCA! If any here present find that I am in error 393 regarding the details of some of these tales, I beg your forgiveness. I recount 394 them from memory, and thus may misremember small details. 395 About 7 years ago, a young lord named "Gillmarond of the Blue Flame" was 396 married. It was a fine ceremony, many of the local Society attended (in proper 397 garb of course, none of these outlandish mundane clothes!). Now Gilmarond looked 398 quite the proper viking. Well muscled (though not bulgingly so), long blond hair 399 (to the middle of his back), etc. He and his bride received many fine gifts. 400 Afterwards, they loaded them all into their dragon (dragon: SCA for "automobile") 401 for the journey home. When they arrived they were quite tired as the revel after 402 the wedding had gone on quite late. They decided that they would unload the 403 dragon in the morning. However, Gilmarond (being a TRUE viking), decided that he 404 would take the new war ax in to the house. This was a fine shoulder axe, 4 feet 405 long with a curved blade. 406 Now the bedroom in their house was at the head of the stairs, and had a window 407 that overlooked the street where the dragon was parked. Since it was a warm June 408 night, they left the window open. 409 At about 2 am, Gilmarond heard a noise. Getting up, he looked out the window. 410 He saw a man attempting to break into the dragon. Not bothering to get dressed 411 (Gilmarond slept in the nude), he grabbed up the ax & ran from the room. 412 Now from the bedroom door it was a straight shot down the stairs and out the 413 door to the car! 414 Picture the would be thief, as a SIX-FOOT NAKED VIKING waving an AX over his 415 head comes charging out the door screaming "ODIN!" 416 Some say the thief is running yet! 417 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 418 Do not get the wrong impression, we of the SCA are quite peaceful. We DO study 419 various war-like arts, but we also study those of peace. I must admit however, 420 that many of us feel that courtesy and politeness must occasionally be backed by 421 readiness to defend oneself and others against those who would mistake that 422 courtesy for weakness. Which brings me to another tale..... 423 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~BARD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ 424 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 425 to:"======================" above 426 I have never been good at spelling or possesives.I am able to learn from 427 CONSTRUCTIVE critisism but "so it makes no sense" is not required for this and 428 only serves to make my immage of you less then nice,by the way...do you have a 429 name?? 430 The Man in Gray 431 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 432 Bard: 433 not too long ago (I can't recall if it was here or elsewhere), it 434 was mentioned that something SCA-related was too occur on the 18th. 435 I've been curious about the SCA for some time, but have had no 436 contact person. Could you enlighten me as to the time, locale, 437 and schedule of events? If I am in error, please correct me. 438 Thanks. 439 000000000000000000000000000voyeur000000000000000000000000000000 440 exit 441 442 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= 443 Voyeur: Someone told me (as best as I can remember) that the SCA has some 444 sort of festival up in washington (either tacoma or Seattle, I can't 445 remember which). 446 Bard: The first tale was great, I'm on the edge of my seat waiting 447 for the next. 448 Bo 449 =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 450 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? 451 BO: FILE UNSAFE MEANS SOMEONE EXITED WITHOUT USEING THE OFF COMMAND, OR 452 THAT THEY WERE THROWN OFF THE SYSTEM BY PERHAPS, CALL WAITING. WHICH 453 HAPPENS TO ME AT TIMES, WHEN I'M ON MY COMPUTER AND SOMEONE CALLS IN. 454 MAN IN GREY: HOW DID YOU COME UPON YOUR NAME? 455 THE REST OF THE STORY BIT WAS QUITE INTERESTING, IN FACT THE WHOLE 456 BOOK IS VERY EYE OPENING. IT'S AMAZING THE LENGTHS GOVERNMENT WILL GO TO 457 FOR A WAR. OR AT LEAST ONE THATS SANCTIONED ANYHOW. THE SPANISH AMERICAN 458 WAR CAME ABOUT BY US BLOWING UP ONE OF OUR OWN SHIPS IN A SPANISH HABOR. 459 OR AT LEAST THAT'S WHAT I READ IN "THE REST OF THE STORY", BUT I'VE HAD 460 LITTLE TIME TO CHECK IT OUT? 461 ROOT: DO YOU ACCESS THIS SYSTEM EVER? 462 ?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!DEBORAH?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? 463 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 464 Deborah,back in the dark ages(befor my computer) I used cbbs on sombody 465 elses system,through this I met somebody with some of my own interests and 466 we decided to meet.the problem was raised as to how we would find each other 467 so I dressed up entirely in gray velour and said"look for the man in gray" 468 it stuck,so when I got the terminal up and found bwms again(aaron gave me 469 the number once) thats what I used. 470 Jonathan Chance,as for chs today I was unable to attend due to a small run 471 in with the local constabulary at 2 in the mourning which cause much sleep 472 loss(ever try to explane why you have blood all over your body and are 473 walking around in the dead of night?) give me a call and i'll fill in the 474 details(have school from 6 to 9). 475 The Man in Gray 476 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 477 ############################################################################ 478 Hey! This is Figment of the imagination. 479 480 Did anyone out there hear about the new 481 charity organization that Micheal Jackson 482 and Richard Pryour are starting? 483 484 485 *It's called: Ignited Negro College Fund* 486 487 *HA HA* 488 489 490 ############################################################################ 491 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 492 DESPITE THE COMMENTS BY M.I.G., I GET THE POINT OF YOUR MESSAGES. 493 I MEARLY WANTED TO SEE IF THERE WOULD BE MORE INTELLEGENT RESPONSES THAN 494 !YOU ARE CRAZY(INSANE, DEMENTED, PERVERTED, ETC.)! 495 LET'S DROP THAT AND MOVE ON TO SOMETHING MORE FULFILLING(???) 496 497 P.V. JELTZ: FACINATING ARTICLES! COULD YOU AGAIN CITE THE SOURCE FOR ME? 498 499 TOPICS ARE ABSENT FROM MY MIND AS OF CURRENT. THE ONLY ONE I CAN THINK 500 OF NOW IS 'HOW ACCURATE ARE TESTS SUCH AS THE SAT AS A MEASURE OF ABILITY'? 501 502 503 I SHALL LEAVE WITH AN INTERESTING QUOTE: 504 BUT WHAT SORT OF CREATURE HAS THE BRAINS TO BUILD A SHIP AND NOT THE 505 SENSE TO CARRY A MEANS OF DEFENSE? 506 THEY WERE AN ESSENTIALLY LOGICAL PEOPLE. 507 THE POOR SAPS! 508 509 510 FROM "DIABOLOGIC" BY ERIC FRANK RUSSEL. 511 512 513 JONATHAN CHANCE 514 &&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&&& 515 -------------------------------------------------------- 516 FRANCISfrom the book 'Destiny,' by Paul Aurandt 517 518 519 Where have the hysterical teenage audiences gone? In the 1960's frantic, grimacing young girls swooned over the Beatles. 520 In the fifties their older sisters went wild at the sight or sound of Elvis Presley. 521 In the forties it was someone else. 522 His name was Francis, although I don't believe anybody ever called him that. 523 Now we are going to call him that. 524 What Francis did to the young women of his generation----their psyches, their souls---was positively astounding. How quickly 525 we forget. 526 During performances they leaped from their seats and rushed toward the stage. They threw bouquets of flowers and jewelry and 527 sometimes articles of clothing. They wept. They screamed. They fainted. They behaved in every bizarre manner imaginable. 528 A stodgy old physician was once asked to describe, in his own terms, the effect of Francis on the feminine listeners. He 529 attended a personal appearance and came away shaking his head, speaking of magnetism and electricity and contagion, of 530 histrionic epilepsh and sexual arousal and even of a phenomenon which had seemed identical to that of tickling! 531 Indeed, no one ever before in the history of show business had held his fans under such a spell. 532 Teenagers and older women clawed and scratched and fought like roller-derby amazons over souvenirs. Anything would do, as 533 he had touched it. Young ladies often dashed toward him with scissors, hoping to abscond with a lock of hair. One woman 534 actually siezed the butt of a cigar she had watched Francis smoke, then carried it in her bosom for years, some say forever 535 after. 536 And there were groupies in the forties, if we ma call them that. The ones who waited for Francis at his hotel. The ones who 537 followed him from town to town on tour, some even disguising themselves as men so they could get unobtrusively closer to him. 538 The profound devotion of his admirers made Francis perhaps the wealthiest performer of his day. And he spent money lavishly. 539 At one time he had no fewer than 60 expensively tailored jackets and 365 ties. 540 Manufacturerss capitalized on his celebrity, flooding their various markets for more than a decade with cloting and jewelry 541 and even candy merchandised under Francis' name. 542 His egomania was staggering. A superstar, he never let anyone forget it. He thrived on adulation and could not bear to lose 543 the spotlight, on- or offstage. In fact, a great conflict existed between his innate love of solitude and his need for a 544 fawning entourage. 545 Bad press, and there was much of it, often droe him into a profane fist-shaking frenzy. Yet it should be noted that Francis 546 vigorously encouraged the gossip regarding his sporadic misbehavior, and sometimes impertinence in the presence of VIP's. 547 Also there were fine qualities, kindness and generosity, which offset his constant pride and occasional irascibility. 548 Music aside, however, the world of entertainment will longest remember Francis' sex appeal. Even as a much older man, he 549 never failed to attract women. 550 So perhaps it was envy, in part, that inspired so many of his colleages to minimize the accomplishments of the dazzling 551 performer with the shoulder-length hair and the outrageous tight-fitting costumes. 552 He was the first one-man show in the history of the concert stage, the mesmerizing pianist-composer of the 1840s who turned a 553 generation upside down. 554 Francis, in Hungarian, "Ferencz." 555 He called himself Franz. 556 Franz Liszt. 557 Now you know THE REST OF THE STORY. 558 559 ---------------------------------------------------- P. V. Jeltz ------------- 560 ############################################################################ 561 Hey! P. V. Jeltz! I don't care for your stupid 562 "REST OF THE STORY". It takes up a lot of 563 room. 564 565 You sound stupid too. I'll bet you don't 566 know how the baby crossed the road do you? 567 568 569 *Stapled to the chicken@ 570 571 *Ha Ha* 572 573 Now YOU know THE REST OF THE STORY! 574 575 Signed: Figment of the imagination 576 577 ############################################################################ 578 The poet gazed through glazed red eyes at his drinking companion. 579 "You, my friend, are as grey as your velour," quoth he. "Did I hear correctly? Did that rather striking young ladystate 580 that she was your daughter? Please, sir, the rest of the story! Or perhaps she was a figment of my imagination?" The poet 581 hoped this was not the case, for he had gained a certain aversion to such figments of late, due to a fig of poor taste he 582 had recently encountered. 583 The Grey One remained silent. 584 "Perhaps if I were to pay for the next round..." Not a twitch. Now the poet was beginning to worry; an offer such as that 585 came but once in a lifetime... 586 && The Mad Actor && 587 588 pppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 589 The piper folded his stand of pipes carefully and placed them on a convenient 590 ledge jutting from the nearby wall. Sitting at the table he grasped the edge 591 as the rickety stool tipped beneath him. 592 He was alright as long as he held onto the tabletop -- through three ales 593 and several storys, but at the conclusion of the bard's exceptionally well-told 594 tale, gales of laughter tipped the abused stool just a little too far... 595 ppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppppp 596 Another disk with space left over and no PAM to do the honer of 597 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 598 finishing it off. I hope she didn't lose her way. Though the 599 Rowan tree outside the Inn is tatered with so many borrowing 600 shoots for their own purposes, it still stands firm against 601 all onslots. It has even managed to survive a deadly mini-war 602 in the Inn with minimal damage to itself. So if you're out there 603 listening PAM, hurry home soon, we miss you. 604 +++++++++++++++++++++ I.S. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ 605 ???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? 606 At the Inn... 607 and tell me good lady,how I have become the benefactor of this office of "father 608 "well if you can remember 19 years ago when you first came to this land.it seems 609 that you and my mother had a little afare and then you were drafted into the war 610 "she said. 611 "and what be your name? and why are you here,the last thing I'd think you would 612 want is to see a man who deserted you?" 613 "well my name is lynn which if you would stop drinking that stuff you would 614 remember naming me!" said lynn with more then a little anger "and as to why i'm 615 here you will not like it,it seems that my present family remembers your past" 616 617 "let me guess,the battle of tabor? and they want me to kill somebody? well,I am 618 no longer the kings hired killer!" 619 "no no,far from it,the king simply wants to find out who is importing high 620 quality weapons into this time frame" said lynn 621 "and what of payment" said Gray,wetting his appatite for battle 622 "ha,for payment my present father said that you may keep your life! but I may 623 put in the good word for you" 624 at that Graymalken noticed that half the Inn was listening to the words 625 being said and stated "perhaps we can talk some other place? there is also a 626 rather demented looking player wxo looks as to want to buy me another drink, 627 which I definatly do not need" 629 The Man in Gray?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????? >